When children are young and between 1 and 4 years old, you may feel that you cannot handle them because tantrums are common, especially from the age of two. But this doesn't have to make you frustrated when it comes to disciplining your children. You must think that it is a natural and evolutionary process in their development, it is necessary for them to learn and for you to teach them which is the correct path, without shouting or bad manners.
Young children up to the age of four will need your guidance and understanding over and over again, because you may give them a command and soon they will have forgotten. But remember that it is very important to treat them through positive discipline, a good reinforcement is very important to ensure that an appropriate behavior is repeated. But once we know this, how should 5-7 year olds be disciplined?
When children pass the threshold of 4 years they are evolving rapidly and they are increasingly aware of what is happening around them, so it is important to know what forms are the most appropriate to be able to discipline them without falling into punishment, threats or fear.
Short and simple commands
If you reason with your child the first time he breaks the rules and offer detailed explanations about what he has done wrong and angrily threaten him about the privileges he will lose if he does not stop misbehaving ... you should know that as a discipline strategy it is quite ineffective and can also affect children emotionally because they feel the threat too much.
An 18-month-old child does not have enough cognitive ability to understand complex sentences, a 2 or 3-year-old child does not have enough attention span to understand what you are saying, but you must warn him and guide him in understanding, and When they pass the 4-year threshold, they will be able to understand those things that you explain to them in short sentences and that you repeat a few times, incorporating vocal inflections and facial expressions.
Find a pause time
If at a certain moment there have been too many reprimands, you have redirected them too many times or even the loss of privileges is being used excessively, then the children have not learned that this behavior is not correct and they think they can continue to do it. To give them time to think it is necessary that you leave him in waiting time (one minute for each year of age), but that in this type of pause you do not leave him alone.
It is very important that you reflect together on what is happening and that you convey to him exactly what you expect from him at any given moment. A) Yes, Perhaps by motivating him with some positive reinforcement, you can get him to understand that his good behavior also has positive consequences.
Pause time example
This way the children will be able to feel you close and will realize that not everything must be bad. But before using the pause time (or waiting time) it will be necessary that with a smile but with a firm voice you say something like: "I count to three and if you don't stop we'll have to wait time."
If after counting to three your child has not listened, you should take him to a quiet and safe place with a timer to think and reflect. At the end, you will need to invite him to apologize and give him a big hug so that he feels that you are not angry. After a while of practicing this strategy you will notice how their negative behavior will begin to decrease.
You must have a positive attitude
It is very important that you have a positive attitude about everything that happens even if your child has negative behavior. No matter how frustrated you feel towards your child's behavior, never get angry in front of him. It is also very important that you never judge him as a person: "you are a bad boy" and if you accuse the behavior: "Does not stick to your sister". If you speak to your children in a desperate or negative way, it will make the same impression on them as if you saw your office boss lose control of the companyThey will not have a good image of you and will repeat the behavior that you have been doing until now because they will not trust your leadership ability.
But I must also tell you, that mothers and fathers are people who get tired, that we can have bad nights, that we can feel bad and even have a bad day ... it is totally normal that you feel exasperated from time to time. When you feel like this, you can go to your pediatrician, talk to your partner or a trusted friend (who is also a parent) to ask for support or advice. What cannot happen is that you lose control every day or you are not able to control your emotions, in this case you should analyze what is happening to you. Remember that to discipline a child you must be emotionally balanced in order to transmit security and affection.
Keep calm
It is true that sometimes it can be difficult to stay calm, especially when your child is trying to break something, hitting the dog, does not want to brush his teeth, it seems that bedtime does not interest him or is having a tantrum on the floor. But if you yell in anger, you are sending the wrong message and you are also reinforcing their behavior in a negative way: "if I misbehave my parents listen to me." The best thing in this case is to take a deep breath, count to three or ten, go down to the level of the child's eyes and speak with him in a firm, serious and severe way ... but without screaming, or nerves, or bad manners.
If you follow all these tips, you will realize that your children between 5 and 7 years old will begin to have better behavior, but remember that it is essential that you be a good example of behavior and emotional balance.