There are children who in certain cases become great manipulators, in some cases we find that a daughter is totally manipulative with both parents and friends. In these cases we speak of a childhood stage where children are like sponges, but with a behavior and attitude assimilated from someone around him.
These moments of manipulation usually happen at times when your daughter does not want to go somewhere, when she pretends not to go to school or has a big tantrum when she wants to go to play in the park and cannot leave. They are even great manipulators with certain people, with the father or mother, depending on who has more weakness.
When can a daughter become manipulative?
The moment children begin to have small responsibilities is when they start looking for answers not to be able to execute what they have to do. It is from 4 years when they have the knowledge to observe that older people have desires and intentions. They know that thanks to their thinking they achieve goals and that too They apply it to their day to day.
Manipulation inside the home
Girls, like boys, begin to manipulate their parents' lives little by little, they will include small ways or acts to get your way. There are manipulative girls with the desire to punish their parents by acting nasty.
Maybe the girl wants you to buy her something or wants to do something at a specific time. Given the refusal of one of the parents for not giving in, this is when manipulation begins and is quite aware. The girl can blackmail by not wanting to go somewhere, not doing homework ... and to avoid that suffering the parents they give in to his whims.
In other cases the girl can be a self punishingIf you do not get away with it, you can hurt yourself by hitting or picking up a toy or precious item and breaking it. This time there is a feeling of guilt and capture the attention of parents In its whole.
There are girls who use its manipulation to such an extreme that can involve parents in lies. In this case the girls use their thoughts and imagination to get what they want. They can come to relate events that have happened to us, as if they have been beaten, mistreated or cruelly punished if they do not do what they were ordered.
Manipulation with friends
Here the girls observe that they get away with it at home, and in the same way they know that they can also do it with friends, especially with friends of the same age. Girls use a lot cooperative or social strategies to solve the stumbling blocks with their friends.
In order to get away with it, children use the verbal form or even physical threats. Girls use strategies more along with acts and speech. Here they are using tangles in relationships, arguments, they misuse phrases with deception, they omit or ignore a friend or friend, such as not inviting them to an event.
How can we help our manipulative daughter?
Manipulative children are objects of imitation of parents. They know that parents use the same manipulative tool with them to achieve certain goals, so they adopt it too.
Try not to use the same game manipulating them, use discipline instead of manipulation, but this time with love and a big smile. Our little manipulative gestures are: “if you give me a kiss, I'll give you a candy”, “put on your pajamas or I won't read you a story”, “stop crying, everyone is going to look at you”, and so on.
This way of acting is totally unconscious on the part of the parents, but you have to know how calibrate the words so that they do not give way. You can ask for things or use discipline without trying to manipulate. Putting a smile or having something done, but with love, will make them pay much more attention to your requests.
When you observe that your daughter is manipulating do not give in to their requests and blackmails. You have to stay in control and calm, don't get carried away by their crying and their attempts to blame you. You have to make him understand that he has to weigh what has been ruled and that he will get what he wants with better manners and when he behaves differently.
As a conclusion it is better use the act of conciliation, you have to stand firm and be able to teach the best way with a lot of patience. If the behavior begins to have an effect and is positive, its reward should not be lacking. It must be made clear that it is not always necessary to achieve what you want on a whim and so he can deal with a lot Better with frustration.