Caunar da ba ta da ƙa'ida ita ce ɗayan shahararrun ra'ayoyi a halin yanzu, akwai nau'ikan almara da ke kewaye da shi. Da alama cewa ƙaunataccen ƙaunatacce, ko abubuwan da ake tunani game da shi, shine kawai inganci, kuma duk sauran karkacewa ne daga wannan kyakkyawan tsarin.
A al'adance Motheraunar uwa, daga ɗa zuwa uwa, da kuma uwa ga hera ,anta, an ɗauke shi da wani sharaɗi kuma sanya misali. Wannan shine dalilin da ya sa muke son bayyana abin da wannan ra'ayi ya ƙunsa, a hankali.
Tunani da ma'anar kauna mara misaltuwa
Cauna mara dalili, a cikin tunaninta, ita ce hanyar ƙauna da ake aiwatarwa ba tare da yanayi ba. Duk ɓangarorin biyu suna motsa shi ba tare da samun fa'ida ta ƙwarai ba, bayan ƙwarewar ƙauna kanta. Idan kawai mun tsaya a cikin wannan ma'anar, wannan hanyar ta nuna ƙauna, tunda ba a sake ramawa ba, kuma ba a buƙaci hakan a cikin ƙaunataccen ƙauna, yana da yiwuwar haifar da wahala.
Hakanan zamu iya bayyana ma'anar soyayya mara misaltuwa kamar ji da aikin son kyautatawa ɗayan don sama da komai. Ba tare da la’akari da sakamakon ba. Hakanan an bayyana wannan ƙaunar ta hanyar tunanin Girka na agape.
Amma bayan labari da ka'idar dole ne mu zama masu sani, a matsayinmu na iyaye mata, hakan soyayyar uwa shine koya. Yana da m yi kuma zamu iya la'akari da shi azaman ƙaunatacciyar soyayya, kodayake saboda wannan dole ne muyi la'akari da sake tsara wasu ra'ayoyi game da soyayya.
Wasu jagororin da ra'ayoyi game da ƙaunataccen ƙauna
Bari soyayyar ta zama mara tsari, idan muna son kiranta haka baya nufin cewa makauniyar soyayya ce. Aiki ne na dogon lokaci saboda haka soyayya ce tare da buɗe idanu. A wannan ma'anar, yanayin rashin sharadi yana nuna a mataki Fiye da ji. Don neman kyautatawa ƙaunataccen ƙaunatacce, a wannan yanayin ɗanmu ko 'yarmu. shi ne cewa muna aiwatar da jerin ayyuka. Waɗannan ayyukan na iya haifar da sakamako mai kyau ko mara kyau, amma asalinsu ƙauna ne.
ido! saboda kasan wannan tambarin na soyayya mara misaltuwa zai iya boye a kariya da sarrafa kuzari irin wannan game da yara cewa ya zama ƙaramin zalunci. Iyaye maza da mata suna kula da 'ya'yansu ba tare da la'akari da ko sun yaba ko a'a ba.
Wani lokaci a karkashin ƙaunatacciyar soyayya suna ɓoyewa halayen halayyar dan adam da yanayin mu'amala da suke da lahani a lokuta da dama. Sanin yadda ake samun daidaito tsakanin kulawa da ƙaunatacce da kiyaye mutuncin mutum shine mabuɗin kiyaye lafiyar iyali, da kuma dangantakar iyaye da yara. Muna so mu baku shawarar gargajiya a cikin wannan ma'anar, littafin Theaunar ichauna ta Erich Fromm.
Motheraunar uwa, ƙaunatacciyar soyayya
Mun sanya muku sunan littafin Daga Fasaha na vingauna, domin a cikin sa ya ɗauki ƙaunar uwa, a matsayin ƙaunatacciyar ƙauna ta yanayinta. Masanin falsafar yayi hujja da cewa uwaye suna son jarirai don zama 'ya'yansu, ba wai don jaririn ya haɗu da wata takamaiman buƙata ba, ko haɗuwa da wani fata na musamman ba. Har ila yau marubucin ya fayyace cewa yana nufin kaunar nau'ikan nau'ikan nau'ikan, wanda hakan ba ya nufin cewa dukkan uwaye suna kauna ta wannan hanyar.
Daga gefen yaron, ƙauna mara iyaka shine dogon buri na kowane mutum. Ba lallai bane kuyi kowane irin cancanta don cancanci ƙaunar iyaye. Koyaya, wannan dogon buri ne, tunda yara da samari da yawa suna jin rashin kwanciyar hankali game da amincin ƙaunar mahaifiya. Suna tsoron cewa wannan ƙaunar za ta shuɗe idan ba a cim ma burinsu ba.
Dagam yayi jayayya cewa wannan shine dalilin da yasa muka jingina soyayyar mahaifiya, tun tana yarinta harma da ta manya. Aunar uwa tana haifar da jin daɗi da rashi na rashin yanke ƙauna da watsi. Uwa tana son yaranta ba wai don suna da kyau ko biyayya ba, kuma ba don sun sadu da abin da take tsammani ba, sai don kawai su 'ya'yanta ne.