"Hudiki hunenge husingaonekwe" uye mazhinji matambudziko anosangana nevasikana nevakomana haanyatso kuoneka, sezvinoitika kune mamwe marudzi ekushungurudzwa. Iyo kushungurudzwa mupfungwa uye pabonde (ASI) ivo vanowanzo kufuratirwa nechaunga chakanangana nevanhu vakuru. Kana tikataura nezveASIs, inozivikanwa kubva kuzvidzidzo zvakasiyana kuSpain (Félix López / Ministry of Social Affairs 1994), Europe, United States neCanada, izvo zvikamu zvinosvika pakati pe20 / 25% yevasikana uye 10/15 muzana yevakomana, vanogona kutambura nekushungurudzwa pabonde vasati vasvika zera.
Pamusoro peizvi, 80% yematambudziko anoitwa nemunhu ari padyo nemudiki (kana mudiki): hama, vadzidzisi, vavakidzani, vatariri, shamwari dzaamai kana baba, nezvimwe. Nehurombo huwandu hwevakabatwa haushanduke nekufamba kwenguva, kunyangwe isu tese tinosemeswa patinonzwa chinhu chenhau panhau, kana kuverenga icho mupepanhau ratinonyorera. Uye avo vanobatwa vanotambura mhedzisiro yenharaunda inogona kuramba chokwadi, kurerutsa kana kudzikisira kukosha kwavo; uye kubva munharaunda isina kugadzirira kubvuma kuti hongu, baba vanogona kushungurudza mwanasikana wavo, uye hongu, mudzidzisi anogona kushungurudza mudzidzi.
Pasina kutaura nezvekushungurudzwa zvakapetwa katatu kana katatu kuti anotambura (tinotaura nezvazvo pazasi). Uye kwete, vanhu vakuru vese vakakomberedza vasikana nevakomana zvikara, Asi isu tinokanganwa kuti zvinoita (padyo kana kure), uye kana zvikaitika isu tinogona kupa mhosva iko kushanduka kwemanzwiro, izvo zvinoramba kuona uyu kana munhu iyeye, iyo enuresis inoitika pazera regumi ... kune chero chinhu chidiki pane fungidziro inotambudza musoro wedu asi huropi hwedu hunovanda nekuda kwekutya kunobva kudzidzo yakagamuchirwa.
Iye zvino ndiri kuzokuudza nyaya yemusikana ane makore mapfumbamwe chete ekuberekwa uyo anga achitaura kuve nyajambwa wekushungurudzwa kwe9 years, uyo anomushungurudza ari baba vake. Nyanzvi yakamuongorora yakatenda kuti musikana mudiki aifungidzira uye akavhara nyaya. Mushure mekufamba kwenguva, makakatanwa (uye nezvimwe) pakati pevabereki vakaparadzaniswa uye neapo neapo humbowo hwepanyama hwekuti izvo zvakataurwa zvaive zvechokwadi, María (zita rakagadzirwa) aida kuratidza chokwadi chemashoko ake.
Udiki (chaihwo) kuchengetedzwa maringe neKukuvadzwa Kaviri
Kuratidza izvi, tepi rekodhi yakasarudzwa pasokisi, uye yakarekora maawa akati wandei ekukurukura nababa nasekuru nasekuru. Mukutaura, mubereki anoomerera kuti waingova mutambo, sekuru vanoedza kutsausa kufarira, uye mbuya vanodhonza pasuru uye vanopedza nhaurirano. Asi musikana mudiki akasimbirira kuti muviri wake ndewake uye hapana munhu ane mvumo yekuibata. Akaudzawo nyanzvi yezvepfungwa muzuva rake kuti "baba vake vakamubata pasi pebhurukwa rake", uye nyanzvi yakataura kuti nyaya iyi "haina chimiro chine musoro uye ruzivo"; chaizvo? Tinoda here musikana ane makore manomwe ekuberekwa kuti aratidze hunyanzvi hwekutaura paruzhinji kuti titende?
Ruzivo rwunofanirwa kutariswa nderekuti amai, kana vachiongorora vhidhiyo yebvunzo, vanoona zvinokanganisa pakuongorora uye kumanikidza zvakanyanya pamusikana mudiki; kutaura chokwadi, ndinopokana kuti pasi pemamiriro aya mhedziso dzinogona kutorwa dzinokudza mwana. Pazasi ndakaisa vhidhiyo inorondedzera kushungurudzwa kwavanoitirwa, uye mamiriro akafanana neakataurwa naamai.
Kazhinji hapana bvunzo dzepanyama, asi kune zviratidzo, uye nyanzvi dzinoongorora vana vanobatwa vanofanira kutarisa kwavari. Chakaipisisa (kana zvichikwanisika) kuverenga zvirevo panhau dzandiri, sezvo zvichinongedzera mukufungidzirwa kwekubiridzira amai pamusikana, zvichibva paParental Alignment Syndrome, inopokana uye inopokana chirwere, zvekuti nhasi handisi kuzobatanidzwa.. Kune rangu divi, nongedza kuti:
- Mwana anogona kunyepa kana kuva nezvakawanda zvekufungidzira, asi zvinenge zvisati zvamboitika nezvekushungurudzwa kwevana pabonde: havagadziri zvavasati vasangana nazvo. Ngatione kana zvapinda mumusoro medu kuti huropi hwemwana hunoshanda sehwemunhu mukuru.
- Kuti uongorore nyaya yerudzi urwu, munhu anofanirwa kunge akagadzirira uye akadzidziswa, kwete vese vashandi vezvemagariro, vadzidzisi, masayendisiti epfungwa, vatongi, nezvimwe. ziva maitiro ekuona ASI! Ndeapi manejimendi akamirira kuvadzidzisa? Unyanzvi hwakanaka hunogona kutonga kunze kwekushungurudzwa pabonde, ini ndinoomerera: HUNOGONA hunyanzvi. Iyo muzana yemishumo yenhema inofungidzirwa kuve iri pakati pe2 ne8%. Zvinotaridza kwandiri kuti zororo rakakura zvakakwana kuti isu titeerere.
Vasikana, kushungurudzwa pabonde nekushungurudzwa kaviri.
Vane pavashanu voga vanyajambwa vasikana, uye pamusoro pekushungurudzwa kwekushungurudzwa, vanotambura kunyadziswa, kutya uye kuyedza kuvanda nemhondi. Kurasika kwekusava nemhosva, kwakabvutwa pane kudaro, nemumwe munhu uyo musimboti anonzi anosungirwa kuda uye kuchengetedza. Vashoma vashoma vanozvitaura, uye ini handishamiswe, nekuti kunze kwekunzwa kunogadzirwa, vana vanomanikidzwa kuramba vakanyarara mune imwe chibvumirano chekunyarara vakasarudza unilaterally nechero ani akabata, akabata, akamanikidzwa kutarisa porn, nezvimwe.
Kana kushungurudzwa 'kukauya pachena' chikamu chechipiri chehusiku chinotanga: havatendi, hapana kurapwa kwakakodzera nemasangano, vanobatwa sevanhu vakuru, vanofanirwa kudzokorora nyaya iyi kakawanda mumutsara kune vanhu havasi ivo vanogara vane hushamwari, Uye isu tichiri kuda kuti varangarire zvakaitika, vadzikame, uye vasazeze pavanotsanangura!
Ndiani anodzivirira vana?
Zvakajairika kuti muzviitiko umo vabereki vanoparadzaniswa kana kurambana, pane mumwe munhu anopomera rimwe remapati kuti ari kukonzera Parental Alignment Syndrome. Iyi dzidziso yakagadziridzwa nachiremba wepfungwa anonzi Gardner, uye ikazosvika pakureva 'kushambidza pfungwa' mumatare ekukwikwidza kuchengetedza kweiye mudiki. Sezvandambotaura, chirwere ichi chakabvunzwa uye kusahadzika kakawanda, chero zvazvingava zvingave zvakashomeka kana wekupedzisira nyanzvi (mushure maverengeka) anosarudza kuvimba neSAP chete uye kwete kunyatsoongororwa kweakabatwa.
Ndinotenda kuti vasikana nevakomana ndivo chinhu chakakosha kwazvo munzanga ino; mumaonero angu kuti mwana anofanirwa kutora kurekodha kuitira kuti vatende kuti hama iri kuibata zvakanyanya, zvakanyanya. Kupindira kunotsvaga kuchengetedza kwakakosha, kuwedzera kwekushandisa zvisirizvo kwesimba muchimiro chekubvunzurudzwa, kutyisidzira mibvunzo uye pasina rutsigiro kune anenge akuvadzwa, zvinotozivikanwa kuti zvinodzivirira anorwisa kupfuura anenge akuvadzwa. Mumwe nemumwe wenyu anowana mhedzisiro yake.
Via - Cadena Ser
Mufananidzo - Tamra McCauley