Akandamkeli umntwana weqabane lam, ndingenza ntoni?

Kunzima ukuba nobudlelwane nomntu kwaye ubone ukuba oyena mntu umthanda kakhulu kweli lizwe akakwamkeli. Isenokuba kungenxa yokuba uqhawulo-mtshato lwalubuhlungu kuye. Mhlawumbi unamathele kakhulu kumzali wakho kwaye awufuni mntu uza kuphazamisa. Nangeyiphi ndlela, yimeko enzima ukujongana nayo.

Kunzima ukuba imeko enjalo ingachaphazeli isibini, Mhlawumbi kuya kukunceda uhlalutye imeko kakuhle. Ekupheleni kosuku, sisiqalo apho nasiphi na isisombululo sinokuqala khona.

Vavanya iimeko zomntwana neqabane lakho

Kuyacetyiswa ukuba ucinge kakuhle kakhulu malunga neemeko apho ukwahlukana kwenzeke khona. Ayifani into yokuba kube luqhawulo-mtshato ngoxolo, ukuba lo mntwana kuye kwafuneka ukuba asokole okanye ade abone ukungavisisani, nokuba kungempahla yesibini okanye kukhuseleko lwabo. Kubalulekile ukuba uqonde indlela ekunzima ngayo kuye.

Ukuba ibilolu qhawulo-mtshato ngoxolo, kusenokwenzeka ukuba umntwana lowo unethemba loxolelwaniso. Kuqhelekile kuwe ukwala nakuphi na ukwenzeka oku. Ke ngoko, kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukuba ekuqaleni, uyakugatya. Kodwa oko akuthethi ukuba kuya kuyenza ngonaphakade.

Ulwahlulo olunzima

Ukuba loo mntwana kuye kwafuneka ukuba abone iingxabano, izinto ziba nzima. Apho kukho ungquzulwano kungakho ukubakho kokunyanzelwa okanye impembelelo embi lelinye iqela. Oko kunokuthetha ukwaliwa komntu wakho, kuba iqabane lakho langaphambili liyamnyanzela.

Isenokuba ngenxa yokuba iqabane lakho lingenzi izinto ngendlela efanelekileyo. Kuwo omabini la mathuba wenzakalisiwe, ke into ebambekayo kukuba usabele kwezi meko zimbini ngendlela ezolileyo neyomonde. Ukukhawuleza ngokwakho kunokubangela iingxaki ngakumbi kunezibonelelo.

Ukuba iqabane lakho khange lenze izinto kakuhle, thetha ngalo kwaye ubeke zonke iindlela zokulungisa umonakalo. Kuya kufuneka uqonde ukuba yenzelwe umntwana wakho, hayi eyakho kuphela. Ukuba uza kuqala ubudlelane, kubalulekile ukuba nivane. Ayizukukwazi ukuba nobudlelwane obulungileyo ukuba isimo sakho sengqondo singekho mthethweni okanye sinemveliso.

Ukuba iqabane lakho langaphambili liyamnyanzela umntwana, zama ukumbonisa, ngezenzo zakho, ukuba loo mntu akalunganga. Kuya kuba nzima kakhulu kwaye kuya kufuneka ube nomonde ongapheliyo, kodwa abantwana abazizo izidenge, musa ukumjongela phantsi. Ngothando nokuzingisa, yonke into iyenziwa. Kwimeko yecala elibi, unganqikazi ukuxela.

Umoya wobukhwele

Ukuba umntwana unomona yinto enokwenzeka xa kukho ukunamathela okwaneleyo kumzali ngoku eliqabane lakho. Inokwenzeka ngakumbi ukuba iqabane lakho ligcinwe ngokupheleleyo ngumntwana. Kwimeko apho loo mntwana engamazi omnye utata okanye umama, ukuba ayinguye unyana wosapho olunomzali omnye, kunokwenzeka ukuba umona ukhona.

Bazodlula, yinto yomonde. Kukubonisa imihla ngemihla, ukuba awubi uthando lomntuUkuba akunjalo, uya kunika neyakho.

Ubudala obunzima

Kukho iminyaka ethile enzima kuba sele, umntwana, okanye akunjalo, wenza utshintsho oluninzi. Ukwamkela iqabane likayise okanye lonina, kunokuba kuye, umququ ophula iglasi yakhe. Ke kufuneka umqonde kwaye ube nomonde ngakumbi kuye.

Khumbula ukuba ayiyondima yakho ukuba ngumama wakhe, ngakumbi ukuba sele enayo. Kwimeko apho engenayo, nguye ekufuneka akhethe ukuba akunike okanye angakunika loo ndima. Ukuba mncinci, iqabane lakho linoxanduva lomntu wakhe kwaye ligqibe malunga nabantu abamkhathaleleyo. Nokuba ku Ukunyanzelwa liqabane lakho kunokuzenza mandundu izinto kwaye kubangele ukwaliwa ngakumbi njengesenzo semvukelo.

Yintoni ongayenza ngayo?

Eyona nto onokuyenza mhlonele kangangoko. Thatha ingqalelo iimvakalelo zakhe zokwaliwa kuwe kwaye uzame ukunqanda ukumcaphukisa kangangoko kunokwenzeka. Le yindlela oya kuyifumana ngayo intlonipho kunye nothando.

Yiba neenkcukacha naye ezibonisa yonke imihla ukuba uyamxabisa njengomntu kwaye uyamxabisa. Kufuneka eyazi ukuba niyintsapho kwaye usapho luyakhathala kwaye luyathandana, menze aqonde ngomzekelo wakho. Awungekhe uyifumane ngosuku lokuqala, kodwa ezona zinto zibalaseleyo ebomini zezona zisetyenzelwe nzima.