Indlela yokunceda umntwana alahlekelwe yintloni

Phantse sonke ngaxa lithile siye saziva sineentloni. Ngoxa iintloni zisenokubenza bazive bedimazekile abanye bethu, abanye bayayityeshela baze baqhubeke nobomi. Yimvakalelo enzima ukumelana nayo, ingakumbi ebantwaneni.. Iintloni zinokwenza umntwana wakho azive esoyika okanye engonwabanga. Noko ke, ukumfundisa ukuba aphulukane neentloni kunokuba ngamava abalulekileyo okufunda.

iimvakalelo zentloni kunokuthoba ukuzithemba komntwana wakho kwaye kuchaphazele ukuzithemba kwakhe. Njengabazali, kufuneka sifundise abantwana bethu ukulawula ezo mvakalelo ngokufanelekileyo. Kodwa, ngenxa yoku, kukwayimfuneko ukuba siqonde kakuhle ukuba yintoni na ngokwenene ihlazo.

Yintoni shame?

Njengabantu, simisela imigaqo yokuziphatha kwaye senze ngokuhambelana nayo. Kodwa xa singenzi ngokwemigaqo emiselweyo kwaye sitsale ingqalelo yabanye, siziva singakhululekanga kwaye inkxalabo yokuvavanywa kakubi iyanda. 

Le mvakalelo ibizwa ngokuba lihlazo. Abantwana baba neentloni okanye bangakhululeki kwiimeko ezithile xa beyeka ukuba ziintsana. Iimvakalelo kunye neempawu zokuhlazeka ebantwaneni zinokubonakala njengokubila, ukuthintitha, okanye ukuba neentloni.

Ihlazo linokuba nemiphumo emihle

Xa siziva sineentloni, sithumela umyalezo wokuba siyazisola ngesenzo sethu kwaye siya kwenza konke okusemandleni ethu ukuba singaphindi. Ngoko ke, nangona imvakalelo yehlazo yenza umntwana azive ekhululekile, ukuba iphathwe kakuhle inokuvelisa iziphumo ezincumisayo ngokukhuthaza umntwana ukuba:

• Zilungiselele ngcono ukujongana nemingeni kwixesha elizayo.
• Kuphephe ukuziphatha ngendlela enokubenza bangazihloneli.
• Veza uvelwano kwabanye abantu abaziva beneentloni.

Indlela yokunceda umntwana wakho aphulukane neentloni

Abantwana bafuna uncedo lokuhlangabezana namaxesha abangela iintloni. Ukunceda umntwana wakho ukuba ajamelane kakuhle nezi meko kunokomeleza ukuzithemba kwakhe nokuzithemba. Kwakhona inokukunika amandla okuvula amava amatsha. Ngoko ke, kubalulekile ukuba ukhokele umntwana wakho ngendlela yokoyisa kunye lahlekelwa zintloni. Ngoku, makhe sibone iingcebiso ezinokukunceda kulo msebenzi.

• Yiba ngumzekelo omhle. Umntwana ufunda phantse yonke into ngokujonga abazali bakhe, kwanaxa ejamelene neemeko ezinzima neemvakalelo. Ngoko xa uzifumanisa ukwimeko ebangela iintloni, nyaniseka ngoko ujamelene nako uze wenze ngeyona ndlela ifanelekileyo ukuze umntwana wakho abone indlela efanelekileyo yokuhlangabezana nale meko.
• Sukuhlekisa ngaye. Xa umntwana wakho esenza impazamo okanye eye watyhubela kwimeko ebangela iintloni, musa ukwenza iziqhulo ngayo. Kuwe inokuba yimeko ehlekisayo ngaphandle kokubaluleka, kodwa umntwana wakho unokuhlangabezana nayo ngendlela enzulu kakhulu. Ukugculela umntwana wakho kunokumenza akhathazeke ngakumbi, yaye kumenza azive engakhuselekanga. Iimvakalelo ezimenza angakhululeki ziya kunyuswa kakhulu, ngoko ke kungcono ukuphepha ukuhleka phambi kwakhe.
• Qinisekisa iimvakalelo zabo. Xa umntwana wakho efumana ixesha elihlazo kwaye ekuxelela ngalo, okanye elingqina ngokuthe ngqo, qinisekisa iimvakalelo zabo izinto ezingalunganga. Ukuwola ngokunyanisekileyo okanye ukumxelela nje ukuba uyayiqonda indlela amele ukuba uvakalelwa ngayo kunokumenza azive bhetele kakhulu. Oku kuya kukunika amandla okumelana nokoyisa le meko ilihlazo.
• Mxelele amabali ukuba wenze iintloni. Xa umntwana wakho eziva ehlazekile ngento ethile, unokuziva ngathi nguye kuphela umntu ovakalelwa ngaloo ndlela, okanye ukuba uphosakele ngaloo ndlela. Ukuphelisa ezi mvakalelo zobulolo, xelela umntwana wakho ukuba nawe awulunganga. Oku kuya kumenza aqonde ukuba nabani na unokwenza iimpazamo, kwaye sonke sifanele soyise ezo meko zihlazayo ngeyona ndlela ifanelekileyo.
• Yondla ukuzithemba kwakho. Iintloni zixhokonxa iimvakalelo zoloyiko, ukugxeka nokusilela. Oku kunokwenza umntwana wakho afune ukuphepha ukwenza izinto ezintsha okanye ukuphuma kwindawo yakhe yokuthuthuzela. Yiyo loo nto kubalulekile ukulamkela ihlazo njengemvakalelo eqhelekileyo eyinxalenye yobomi. Simele siqhubeke siphila kwaye sisenza izinto ezintsha nangona sisenokungaphumeleli. Ngokukhuthaza ukuzithemba, siya kukuthintela ukuba ungafuni ukuphila amava anokungakhululeki kwixesha elizayo.
• Fundisa iindlela zokubonisa. UCervantes ukhe wathi "Ukulungiselela isiqingatha soloyiso". Ngoko cela umntwana wakho ukuba abe nomfanekiso-ngqondweni wemeko ebangel’ iintloni aze acinge nangendlela yokuhlangabezana nayo. Ukuba kunzima kuye, unokumbeka kwiimeko ezicingelwayo, kwaye umbuze ukuba angenza ntoni ukuze aphume kuloo meko yokucinga. Lo msebenzi uya kulungiselela umntwana wakho ukuba ajongane neemvakalelo zakhe xa ejongene nemeko engathandekiyo, kuba uya kuba sele enamava kulo msebenzi olawulwayo.