Ungamnceda njani umntwana akwazi ukulawula umsindo

Bonke abantwana, njengabo bonke abantu, bayacaphuka. Xa siziva sisongelwa, sihamba sisilwa, sibaleka okanye sihlala singakwazi ukuhamba. Umsindo yimpendulo yomzimba wethu. Kodwa abantu abapheleli nje ngokuba nomsindo xa bephendula kwizisongelo zangaphandle, nathi siyacaphuka siphendule ezethu iimvakalelo. Ke xa uloyiko lwethu, iintlungu, ukuphoxeka, okanye ezinye iimvakalelo zikhathazekile, siyazihlasela size sigcine iintlungu. Oku kwenzeka emntwaneni xa enomsindo.

Xa abantu beneemvakalelo ezisikhathazayo, sidibana nxamnye nesoyikiso esibonwayo kunye nohlaselo. Oku kuyenzeka nakubantwana. Abantwana abanayo i-cortex engaphambili ephucukileyo ukubanceda bakwazi ukuzilawula, kwaye kunokwenzeka ukuba babe nomsindo ngakumbi nangakumbi xa benomsindo.

Ngamanye amaxesha le mvakalelo isishukumisela ukuba sihlasele iyavakala, kodwa kuphela xa isisongelo, nangona oku kunqabile ngokwenyani. Xa uninzi lwabantwana lucaphuka, lufuna ukuhlasela umntakwabo -kuba wophule into-, abazali babo -kuba 'bebengenabulungisa' kuye, utitshala wabo -kuba wayemhlazisile phambi komntu wonke, umxhaphazi ipatio -kuba iyamoyikisa-, njl. Xa abantwana behlala kwikhaya apho umsindo ulawulwa ngendlela esempilweni, bahlala befunda ukulawula umsindo ngendlela eyakhayo.

Wula umsindo ngendlela eyakhayo

Ukulawula umsindo ngendlela eyakhayo, kukho amanqaku athile ekufuneka uwagcine engqondweni:

Ukulawula iimpembelelo ezinobundlongondlongo

Ngexesha abantwana bekwisikolo sabantwana abancinci, kufuneka babe bekwazi ukunyamezela ukungxama kwe-adrenaline kunye nezinye iikhemikhali zobuchopho ezibabeka kwimeko 'yokulwa' kodwa ngaphandle kokwenza okanye ukuhlasela elinye iqabane. Ngokwamkela umsindo wabantwana kunye nokuhlala uzolile, ukuseka iindlela ezifanelekileyo ukuze bafunde izakhono eziyimfuneko zeemvakalelo, abantwana baya kufunda ukuzola ngaphandle kokwenza / ukuzenzakalisa. Kodwa Khumbula ukuba abantwana banomdla kuba abakakhuli ngokupheleleyo kwaye kuyinto eqhelekileyo ngamanye amaxesha ukuba bangazilawuli kakuhle.

Qaphela iimvakalelo ezisongelayo

Nje ukuba umntwana ayeke ukuziva iintlungu nangasiphi na isizathu, kulapho iimvakalelo zinokusebenza khona kwaye baya kuqala ukuphola. Kufana nomlingo xa abantwana beqonda ukuba abayidingi ingqumbo ukuzikhusela kwezona mvakalelo zisemngciphekweni, kwaye loo msindo uya kusuka nje ube ngumphunga ngonaphakade.

Kwelinye icala, ukuba asibancedi abantwana ukuba basebenze kwezi mvakalelo kwaye baziva bengakhuselekanga ngokwaneleyo ukuba bangaziva, baya kuphelela ekuphelelweni ngumsindo, kuba abasayi kuba nayo enye indlela yokujongana noxinzelelo lwangaphakathi.

Izisombululo ezakhayo

Ixesha elingaphezulu, injongo kukuba umntwana asebenzise umsindo njengesixhobo sokutshintsha izinto ukuba kukho imfuneko ukuze imeko ingaziphindi. Oku kunokubandakanya izisombululo ezinje ngokucela uncedo kubazali ngamaxesha engxabano. Ingabandakanya ukwamkela igalelo lakho kule ngxaki, ukuze ukwazi ukusombulula ingxaki ngokulandela iingcebiso zabazali bakho kwaye uzilungiselele ngakumbi kwixesha elizayo.

Ngoncedo lwakho, umntwana wakho uya kufunda ukuzola xa enomsindo ukuze aveze iimfuno zakhe kunye neminqweno yakhe ngaphandle kokuhlasela omnye umntu, nokuba kungokwasemzimbeni okanye ngamazwi. Uya kufunda ukujonga iimfuno zabanye ngovelwano kwaye afune izisombululo zokuphumelela, endaweni yokucinga ukuba ulungile kanti omnye umntu akalunganga.

Ngokucacileyo, kuthatha iminyaka yesikhokelo sabazali, unyamezelo oluninzi kunye nokunyamezela kwabantwana ukuze bafunde ezi zakhono. Ukuba abazali bayakwazi ukunceda abantwana bazive bekhuselekile ekuvakaliseni umsindo wabo kwaye baphonononge iimvakalelo zangaphakathi, baya kubanakho ukujongana nomsindo wabo ngendlela eyiyo ekusombululeni iingxaki ngexesha lesikolo samabanga aphantsi nakwiminyaka yonke yamabanga aphantsi.

Indlela abaNceda ngayo abazali ukuLawula umsindo wabo

Qala kuwe

Ukuba ungomnye wabantu abangxolayo ebantwaneni, kuya kufuneka uyazi ukuba uyimodeli yokuziphatha komntwana wakho aya kuyikopa kwikamva. Kunokuba nzima ukuyeka ukukhwaza ngequbuliso, ngakumbi ukuba unesiqhelo, kodwa kubalulekile ukuba ukwenze ukusukela ngoku. Ukuba uyangxola okanye uziphathe kakubi, awunakulinda umntwana wakho ukuba afunde ukuzilawula naye. Umntwana wakho ufunda ngokubukela indlela osombulula ngayo ukungavisisani kunye neengxabano kubomi bakho bemihla ngemihla.

Umsebenzi uzolile

Kuyimfuneko ukuba usebenze uzolile ebomini bakho, ngakumbi xa unomsindo, ngale ndlela uya kunceda abantwana bakho bazive bekhuselekile kwaye ubancede baphuhlise iindlela ezifanelekileyo ze-neural kwingqondo yabo ukucima 'umlo okanye inqwelomoya' kwaye uvumele Umphambili wecortex ungaqala ukusebenza ngokuqiqa. Le yindlela abantwana abafunda ngayo ukuzola: ukuzibukela uzolile kuqala. Baza kufunda kulawulo lwakho lomsindo kunye nendlela oziphatha ngayo ezinye iimvakalelo eziphazamisayo, baya kubona ukuba aboyiki ngendlela abonakala ngayo.

Zonke iimvakalelo zivunyelwe

Zizenzo kuphela ekufuneka zinqunyelwe, kodwa iimvakalelo ziya kuhlala zivunyelwe. Xa iimvakalelo okanye iimvakalelo zingekho phantsi kolawulo olululo badinga isikhokelo. Ukuba uvumela abantwana bazive iimvakalelo zabo, baya kubanakho ukuzamkela endaweni yokuzama ukubacinezela. Oku kuya kukunika ulawulo olwaneleyo lokuqonda malunga neemvakalelo ukuze uqale ukubeka iimvakalelo kumagama. endaweni yokuzifaka esitokisini.

Ungathumeli mntwana ukuba azoyise

Xa umntwana enomsindo okanye ecaphukile, injongo yakho njengomzali kukunceda ukubuyisela imeko yokhuseleko, efuna ukuba uzive uzolile. Khumbula ukuba abantwana badinga olona thando xa 'kufanelekile'. Endaweni yokuba babe 'nexesha lokuphumla' bodwa, abantwana bakho baya kufuna ukuziva bengekho bodwa, endaweni yokuziva benesithukuthezi xa befuna kakhulu ukuba kunye nabo.  Uyakumangaliswa yindlela umntwana wakho aza kuqala ngayo ukubonisa ulawulo ngakumbi xa usecaleni kwakhe, kuba uya kuziva ebalulekile kwaye ehamba kunye naye.