Friendships in life can be quite complex, especially in adolescence, when they become more important. Children and adolescents accept the idea that you can have a best friend forever ... Although actually having a friend and keeping him / her forever can be a myth rather than a reality. Having a best friend who will always be by your side is quite complicated.
Consequently, many girls succumb to the pressure of finding a best friend and fall into the trap of trying to be liked by everyone and to please others. This is not only unhealthy, but it can also open the door to toxic relationships. The Cwomen who are more authentic with their friends, even open and honest about their true feelings, they have closer connections.
When a girl's social life goes bad, they blame themselves and think it's the worst thing that can happen to them. This is why talking to daughters about real life friendship is so important. Teach your daughters that friendship is something that happens in life and that it is normal for a friend to be in a bad mood sometimes or that friendships come and go. It is necessary that your daughters (and of course also your sons), learn to understand what it is a healthy friendship and that toxic relationships must be outside the home.
Before waiting for the perfect friendship, it is better to understand what friendship really is and above all, that there are many social beliefs about it, which it is better to deny as soon as possible.
There are no perfect friendships
Although a friendship seems perfect at a certain moment, in reality there are no friendships that are like that. It is important that a friendship is healthy so that feelings can be shared without being afraid that the relationship will end because of it.
In fact, conflicts in friendships will make it become closer and stronger, because if a conflict pushes a friendship away, it is because it never really was. You should not try to "fix" or "change" your friends, you should accept them as they are just as you should wait for them to accept us. In this way a friendship becomes something strong, although that does not mean that it is perfect.
Sometimes they'll exclude you and that's okay
Exclusion is a common thing that happens but when it happens it should not be seen as a bad thing. Sometimes it may be a mistake, other times a preference. Although it is normal to feel sad about it, it is something that can happen and should not affect you more than necessary. It is important to make sure your daughter knows that if they exclude her, it is the others who lose, and not her.
Friends also part
Sometimes friends also separate ... it is like a romantic relationship, sometimes it is important to break up with a person because he does not give us anything or because he hurts us. It is also possible that other people cut us off, and that's not a bad thing. It is an opportunity for learning and growth, and if a person leaves life, it is better to stay with what they have taught us, without grudges.
When a friendship ends, it is usually a sign that something is broken. Encourage your daughter not to think about what could have been, but to see it as an opportunity to let in the next good friend. Acknowledge that your daughter may be saddened by the experience, but remind her that her heart is strong… if she doesn't close her heart, she may find a worthwhile friend soon.
Spending all your time with friends is unrealistic
It is normal for friendships to flow and expecting something different is not healthy. Remind your daughter that there will be times when her friend is too busy with activities and commitments to spend time together.
Or, there may be times when she is too busy. Either way, it can hurt not to spend time together, but it is rarely personal and should be accepted. Making it personal often makes things worse and leads to conflict. Your daughter needs to understand that being too clingy or demanding can push a friend away. Help him recognize that a break with a friend is not a bad thing. Instead, it allows you enough space to discover other friends you can connect with.
Couples shouldn't steal all the time either
Many girls make the mistake of leaving their friends aside when they start dating a person, they think that it is normal and that it is the right thing to do. Nothing is further from reality. As with your friends, your relationship with your partner is healthier when you don't spend all your time with that person.
It is especially unhealthy if your boyfriend demands all of your time. Monopolizing and controlling your daughter's schedule is a warning sign of abuse. You want to make sure your daughter knows that healthier relationships are balanced by spending time with friends and time with her boyfriend. Also, make sure who knows how to detect an abusive or abusive boyfriend before he becomes dangerous.
You may have fake friends
False friendships exist and are common ... in fact, there are many people who are false and who seem one thing but then are another. Friendships sometimes seem one-sided, and when that happens it's because they weren't friends at all.
When this happens your daughter may feel some emotional pain, but it will also make her stronger and help her realize what a real friendship means… and healthier. Toxic friendships should have no place in your life. The more time she spends with unhealthy people, the greater the emotional cost to her. The sooner you realize you need to move on, the better.
Although we have mentioned these tips "for girls", in reality, it works for both boys and girls, since friendship does not understand sexes or ages.