El Emperor Syndrome, also called the tyrant child or boy king is a conduct disorder that some children with domination and tyranny behavior towards their parents.
As children grow, a process opens where they test the limits of their environmentThey learn what can and cannot be done, and to what extent. They need clear routines, rules and limits for healthy development. But sometimes parents totally lose control and become the slaves of their children. Is it possible to detect in time?
Characteristics of children are Emperor Syndrome
This phenomenon of child abuse to parents is becoming more frequent. They are the "bosses" of the house: they steal, threaten, insult and even hit. They scare the whole family.
It has some common characteristics:
- Low tolerance to frustration: they demand the things they want, and if they don't get them they cause disproportionate tantrums. If they get it, it doesn't satisfy them either and they focus on something else.
- Limited resources for troubleshooting: or to face negative feelings.
- Lack of empathy: They find it difficult to feel guilt or remorse for their actions.
- Challenging and aggressive- They challenge the rules and authority figures. They use the emotional blackmail, the insults and yelling. They carry out a real psychological abuse and in the worst case also physical abuse.
- Egocentric: they believe the center of the world, and find justification for their behavior blaming others.
- Low self-esteem: disguised as tyranny.
- Constant state of sadness, anger and / or anxiety.
Whose responsibility is it?
Parents are always blamed in these circumstances for being too permissive. But this aspect alone does not explain this type of behavior. There's others factors that influence the development of the Emperor Syndrome in addition to the style permissive and overprotective education, such as the predisposition character genetics and influence of a consumerist, individualistic and hedonistic society.
How to detect it in time
As in any disorder, early detection is essential so that the situation can be remedied. To be able to do this, the collaboration of the family is needed for treatment with professionals.
There are certain clues that occur between 6-11 years that can serve as a warning:
- Inability to develop authentic moral emotions (love, empathy, compassion ...). This prevents them from being able to connect and to relate to, putting themselves in the other's shoes, and inability to feel regret or guilt. They are what would be called insensitive.
- Seeks your own benefit. He does not learn from mistakes or punishments.
- Exaggerated sense of belonging. Everything is theirs, they do not share things and if someone touches them they can react violently.
- Defy the rules and they break them frequently.
- Conclusion manipulative experts to turn the situation around and blame others so as not to be punished.
How to stop these behaviors
Educating is not easy, and sometimes children's behavior gets out of hand without knowing how to deal with it. To eradicate these behaviors is individual and family treatment with a professional is necessary.
There are also some guidelines that can help you with these tyrannical behaviors:
- Consensus on educational guidelines at home. Agree on the guidelines to follow so that the child does not take advantage of this disagreement to get his way. You have to look for coherence.
- Create very clear rules at home. This point is critical to a foundation of discipline at home. Very clear rules and regulations must be established within the family structure.
- Create routines. From the time of getting up, eating, responsibilities ...
- Do not threaten. Besides it won't work, it will only aggravate your behavior.
- Involve the child in responsibilities at home according to their age.
- Reward appropriate behaviors, and in turn not rewarding negatives with attention. If he yells or kicks, it is best to ignore him until he calms down.
- Be strong. Do not fall into his blackmails, remind him what the rules are and who is in charge.
Why remember ... an education with limits is necessary to educate healthy adults.