Surely this picture sounds familiar to you. You are shopping or having a drink outside the home and your child decides to throw a tantrum in the middle of the street. You try to talk to him but it seems that nothing works and you end up putting your mobile or tablet on him to calm him down. It seems miraculous how they gawk at their favorite cartoon series. But unfortunately it is not all as wonderful as it seems. Calm a tantrum with a tablet or mobile can bring long-term risks that it is good that you know.
New technologies are good without abusing
New technologies have come to help us and make our lives easier. They are great as a learning tool and for developing certain skills. But If we make an indiscriminate use of them or using them when it is not convenient, they can have consequences in the education of your children.
We already speak to you in we speak in this other article of the consequences of electronic devices on the eyes of children, which is very worrying. But there are not only risks for vision of our children. If we use smartphones or tablets to get your child to shift their attention to them and shut up, we will be doing our job as educators very poorly.
Consequences of calming a tantrum with a tablet or mobile
Children's tantrums are the most stressful. They can go out anytime and anywhere, usually in public. In a restaurant, in a shopping center, our patience reaches its limits and we get frustrated, and we choose the easy way: to calm the children with a tablet or mobile. It seems harmless, the children seem to calm down by distracting their attention and we finally get that long-awaited silence. But let's see what negative consequences making this indiscriminate use of new technologies can bring.
- Emotional difficulties. Yes, you read it right. Long-term use of electronic devices to appease children can cause emotional difficulties. All we can do is sedate them, but the problem is not solved. They don't know why they feel that way, much less how to fix it.
- Low tolerance for frustration. In this way they do not learn that things do not always go the way they want, and in the future they will not know how to face a frustration in their life. It will be very difficult for you to properly manage your emotions if you do not deal with them.
- They don't learn to behave. By giving them the device, children see it as a reward for their behavior, which is why their bad behavior is being encouraged. You will know what to do when you want to have the tablet or mobile again.
- Loss of concentration. After the excessive stimuli such as sounds, colors and movements that are on the screens, real life seems stimulating and they will lose their attention and motivation.
- It prevents the development of their self-control. They become impatient children, who want everything right now. You will learn to avoid your emotions and to look elsewhere.
- They lose social contact. Being glued to a screen does not develop their social skills.
Use new technologies sparingly
Ultimately, using new technologies as emotional pacifiers is not a good idea. They accentuate emotional problems and we are not giving our children the necessary tools to properly manage their emotions.
Tantrums are a great time to connect with your child and teach him to manage his emotions. To explain the name of that emotion you have and why you have it. Children do not ride tantrums to annoy parents, they are emotional expressions that they cannot control. That is what parents are for, to help them on the path of emotional intelligence and coping with problems without looking for shortcuts.
In this link you have an article about how to respectfully handle tantrums from love. No shortcuts, no yelling, no fear or threats. A healthy way to relate to your child in his worst moments.
Because remember ... there is no greater investment than working on your child's emotional health.