Perhaps you know a calm baby, one of those who eat and sleep peacefully, who are calm in their stroller and who look at everything with joy and serenity. That's not the type of baby in high demand. A high demand baby wakes up early, is unpredictable, You never know exactly what time he will wake up, he cries a lot to be cared for by his parents, he wants to be held in their arms to calm down, they are sensitive ...
They look like babies with a lot of personality and some parents or people without children think that they are pampered and pampered babies by their parents, but nothing could be further from the truth. From a few weeks high demand babies present characteristics such as: restlessness, are absorbent, restless, sleep little or wake up early, etc.
They do not fall asleep easily and seem to want to fight sleep to stay awake longer. They have an intense personality and it seems that they are fussy babies, but in reality they only tell you more intensely what they want and what they need at all times ... It is important to know what they are saying to be able to serve them correctly.
A high demand baby will need to suckle more, he will need to be held, to be rocked, he will need direct contact with his parents. These needs are related to the individual temperament of the baby. Each child is born with a set of temperament traits that determine how he responds to different experiences, whether or not he can calm himself down, eating and sleeping patterns ... etc.
It can be disconcerting for parents to discover that their baby is a high demand baby. New parents may blame themselves thinking they have done something wrong, mothers may feel that when they were pregnant they did something wrong, perhaps having anxiety or working too much. But no one has done anything wrong. Your baby is not 'bad' nor are you failing in his upbringing. About 15% of babies are in high demand and there are 40% of babies who are 'easier'.
But as you get to know your baby (you will need time and your child will also have to understand his needs and develop skills) life will get easier and what was previously unpredictable there will be times when they are more predictable. But how can you deal with a high demand baby so you can live without stressing yourself too much? Do not miss these tips.
Tips for dealing with a high demand baby
Balance your needs
Even if your baby is in high demand, you should not put yourself aside. You need to take care of yourself because in order to take good care of your baby you must feel rested (where possible) and lively. You also have your own needs. You experience intense parenting and even if you have more challenges than other parents, you should also appreciate the moments that you can make for yourself.
Don't have unrealistic expectations
Try to put unrealistic expectations aside because they will only lead to frustration. Do not compare with other calmer babies or think about the expectations you had of how you wanted your baby to be before he came into the world. Accept that your baby is intense, passionate and persistent ... Because in reality these are positive qualities that will make him succeed in life. They are virtues and in no case should you see them as defects.
Learn to read your baby's signals
You need to learn to read your baby's body signals and what he wants to tell you at all times. A high demand baby can tell you without words what he needs at all times, in a way much easier to understand than any other baby, you just have to pay attention to how he tells you. He may tell you that he wants you to hold him to be calmer. Maybe he is telling you that he does not like the touch of the sheet ... You will have to be patient in the process of understanding your baby, but when you do, everything will become much easier.
Meets your needs
Satisfying their needs will not make them spoiled, they will simply feel security and protection by your side, something essential so that babies in high demand can find a bit of calm in this uncertain world. Don't be afraid to take care of what your baby needs. Don't listen to people's advice unless they really know your situation and have high demand babies too. What works for other babies doesn't have to work for yours.
Ask for help when you need it
You also need to rest and it is very difficult when you have a high demand baby and you also have other responsibilities in your life (such as work, home ...). You need to find someone you trust to help you take care of your baby and that you have a moment of respite, even if only to take a hot bath. Your baby will likely cry while you leave, but if you are sure that that trusted person can comfort him and handle the situation well, then take advantage of the break. You can also hire a babysitter at night so you can sleep through the night, even once a week.
Go out for a walk often
It is necessary to leave the home with a high demand baby for him to feel sufficiently stimulated. In addition, going out and having experiences also helps to strengthen the emotional bond between parents and children. If possible it is a good idea to find other parents with high demand babies for children to play And by the way, know that you are not the only one in the world with a baby of these characteristics.
Here are some tips that you cannot ignore if you have a high demand baby. Although at first it may seem difficult, you need to know that it is temporary and that as you get to know your baby little by little everything will normalize and you will know what your baby needs at all times, you can organize routines at home and that the environment be more predictable and organized for everyone.