How to prevent my child from going with strangers?

The great fear of a mother is that her son disappears, but also not having been able to avoid it. It is sad to believe that the child must know, from a very young age, that there are people who do not act in a correct or healthy way, strangers who can harm them. However, as parents there is an obligation to show and educate in reality and prevent possible acts that harm the minor.

The confidence of a child

In the society we live in, not just now, if not since the beginning of time, there have been people who can infuse the terror, people who are capable of hurting, even children, or separating them from their parents. It is increasingly common to hear stories of children who have suffered violence, for their parents, for other people, and children who have disappeared because of strangers who have crossed their lives.

Children can be taken by force or leave voluntarily, coerced, with people they have seen before and with those who seem nice to them- Children act like this, thinking that they are not doing anything wrong or that nothing is going to happen to them . This is something that you have to educate and work on every day and from a young age. The values ​​that children are taught, they will make them grow emotionally, mature and lay a strong foundation in the face of future events where they know how to discern and react.

A short report that showed children in a park went viral, where despite the fact that their mothers were nearby and in their point of view, they agreed to go with a stranger who promised them candy and show them puppies that he had in his house. The children disappeared with that "stranger" without asking permission, fearing something and before the stupefied gaze of an incredulous mother, who assumed that her son would not do it.

Children tend to be trusting, even more so, if an adult promises them something appetizing. As parents it is necessary to stop this situation. Mainly young children should not be alone in the street. It's okay to greet strangers, but within a limit. Not everything goes. They must be aware of what can happen to them. They must understand that they can lose their parents forever if they leave their side and with another person they do not know. It is hard to instill fear, perhaps it is a precaution, but it is impossible to cope with a loss like that and action must be taken.

Obviously they cannot mistrust everyone, nor turn their faces to all the people who speak to them. It is important that they identify people who are not strange, unknown, strange to them, let's say that they do impose confidence in them. At certain times if the child needs help and is not with his parents, family or friends, he should ask other people for help. The child must know that there are people in uniform, mothers of other children, elderly people, such as their grandparents, to whom they can turn.

Tips for not trusting just anyone

• The child must know: You must dialogue with the child and explain everything. You may not be able to understand who is or is not trusted, at first, especially if you are in a tense situation, need help, are lost and scared. Children should understand that before talking to or leaving with other people who address them, they should ask permission from trusted people. If you need some kind of help and are in a hurry, it is advisable to first look for the police, the workers of the nearby premises or if it is already in one. Given the latter, it is important when visiting a store, cafeteria ..., that the child knows the name of a worker or security.
• Know your name, surname, that of your parents, telephone and, if possible, the home address, by the time you need help and someone requests that information and find your relatives. However, it must be in advance notice of not give your personal data to anyone who asks you for no apparent reason.
• Explain that they should not take anything that he offers them Someone else they don't know: It's okay to ask first if they can get something. The same to go somewhere that they propose. They must ask their parents for permission, family or friends before acting on your own.
• Do not hide information or keep secrets: If the child is confused by this advice, it can be said that it is okay to keep certain surprises, but not to hide any information from the parents. Parents are there to help in everything, not to judge.
• DThey should know that no adult is going to ask a child for help, and that if it happens, they should be suspicious and warn their parents or people around them and trust. Children believe that people are good and should know that there are exceptions. If they see something strange, if that person seems it, they have to understand that the right thing to do is to escape in search of help and not keep anything for themselves.
• Do not force kiss or say hello to strangers: Whether it is the child who approaches or not. If you are uncomfortable, you should not do something to please others. If the parents or relatives themselves make you have that type of actions unintentionally, surely children will believe that other people have the right to do whatever they want with them and force them to do the same.
• Not responding to someone who smiles, speaks and makes friendly gestures with similar actions or that go further. It is okay for people to be kind to children and vice versa, but the limit must be found, more when they are small. The child must learn to value situations. Surely almost every day you will see or greet the same cashier, however, the most normal thing is that if a man stops you on the street one day to talk to you, you just turn around. The child can see and understand that and it is what he should imitate.

The child should go to other people who do not raise suspicion and in public places or cafeterias or stores in his area and that he knows. For a child to recognize suspicious attitudes of other people, he must pay attention to something more than their appearance. The appearance of a stranger you should not trust is usually normal, however, must flee, ask for help from someone you trust, refuse, shout, if the stranger:

1.  Offers candy or toys.
2.  Offers go see puppies or some pet away from where they are.
3. Offers go for a walk with him in a car.
4.  Offers buy him a gift.
5. Offers to do something without the consent of their parents.
6. He tells him that his parents have asked him to pick him up, without having warned them beforehand.
7.  Le ask a favour or keep a secret for you.
8. Makes you feel uncomfortable or asks for inappropriate things.

Prevent children

As adults and people who protect their children, they should be counseled before insurmountable and dramatic situations occur. It should not worry that children are suspicious at first. They should be warned of places to avoid, especially if frequented by people of dubious status. They should be asked not to move. If they say they will be in the park or at a friend's house, they should not move to another place and if so, let them know first to an adult I know. Being in groups of friends or with the parents of other children is the best, since it will be safer.

It is a fundamental rule to teach children to see possible dangers. The child should know that it is not okay to leave or meet people, via Internet or by whatsapp, who does not know, because they can do something bad. Children should know that they do not have to share personal data on their social networks, in fact a small child does not have to have any profile yet. Likewise, they should not carry their name or their own information in sight, in a backpack, clothing ... Mainly young children should have a limited use and time surfing the net and of course limiting their actions.

As parents you have to be cautious and watch for signs. Certain people are insistent when it comes to wanting to kiss or caress children, this can be a red flag. If the child is uncomfortable, the person should be withdrawn. It is thought that outgoing and very talkative children are the ones who are most likely to go with strangers, however, they are the ones who express their emotions and experiences the most. Thus more attention should be paid to more shy children, who will surely save their fears and may be going through some difficult time.

Children must be able to be themselves. They must be educated in respect and solidarity with others, however also in intuition and caution. The child should receive advice and information from his parents, alerting him to the consequences of going with strangers or people who do not give him good vibes. The minor should know that if they feel in danger they should scream, run, push away that person who scares them and seek help. Faced with a fact that generates suspicion and scares you, you should not be self-conscious, or think that you have to keep your education with an adult, your protection comes first.