One of the fears of parents when their children get older is start smoking. Sometimes it is not easy to influence the children's final decision, but we have in our hands tools that can help us to prevent it from happening.
Teenagers can feel pressure to smoke, but we can be a good example for them and show them that this pressure does not really exist. In order to make them understand this, we must be very clear about what leads a teenager to smoke.
Why do teens smoke?
Teens often start "playing" with tobacco for a number of reasons:
They want to fit in with friends
Many teenagers have other friends in their circle of friends who smoke and offer them cigarettes on a daily basis. Young people can give in to this vice for the mere fact of be one of the group, so as not to feel displaced and even, sometimes, to be accepted in the group of friends.
If, in addition, in that group, the person they admire or idealize is one of those who smokes, since they are impressed with the person, they will want to imitate him. They mistakenly assume that smoking is cool too.
they are stressed
Teenagers they have to deal with many changesyes Their bodies change rapidly and they have new sensations in terms of emotions and hormones.
As they get older, adults expect more of them, and we encourage them to be more independent and get good grades in school. In these stages it is very important for them to have friends and make friends, and even more so now with social networks, that if you don't publish how cool you are and the friends you have, it seems that you are nobody.
For relieve stress From everything we've discussed, some teens start smoking because they associate smoking with calming those nerves. This happens because adults usually give this type of signals, which are mistaken, but very present in society. It is very common for an adult, when nervous, to smoke or drink. And this thought marks many teenagers who stick with this idea.
They want to look older
Many first-time smokers view tobacco as part of growing up and they think it makes them look more mature, confident and 'cool'. As in principle only people of legal age smoke, since if they are going to buy tobacco they will only give it to them if they are of legal age, it seems that if they smoke they feel older.
All those things that can only be done after a certain age (drinking, smoking, driving, watching risque movies, etc) gives them this feeling of "power" and "greatness".
They are curious about cigarettes
Teenagers are curious about new things. Teenagers often see people smoking, whether in real life, on television, online, or in magazines and books. It is not surprising that they want to know what a cigarette tastes like, and even more so if it is usually associated (wrongly) with a moment of pleasure and well-being.
When Parents Cause Teens to Smoke…
Many adult smokers started smoking as teenagers. Teens stick with what their parents do, not what they say. We already know that most of the time, and more so in adolescence, words are carried away by the wind. So it's not surprising that teens who start smoking often come from families in which at least one parent smokes.
If your child has already started smoking and you are one of the parents who also smokes, it would be a good example and help for the adolescent if you do the step of quitting smoking. And encourage your child to leave it with you.
You can talk to your child about your decision to quit smoking and seek their help to support you on this path. In this way you will encourage him to want to quit with you and you will face the difficulties that you may face to quit smoking. It is good that you also explain why you have decided to do the step and why you would like him / her to do the same as you.
Talk to your child openly and you will be able to influence it with the values you believe in.
Practical tips to prevent your teenagers from smoking
Once we know what makes them want to smoke we can try to prevent it from happening. I leave you some tips so that your children do not want to smoke:
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Educate them about the harmful effects of smoking
- Explain to your child harmful effects of smoking, such as respiratory problems, the effect on the skin and wrinkles, stains on the teeth, bad breath (they will associate it with kissing, another attractive point in these ages) and how it affects the physical condition and the resistance to do anything thing like sport.
- Talk to them about electronic cigarettes and smokeless tobacco. Many adolescents have the mistaken impression that these alternatives to tobacco are not harmful at all, they must be made to understand that they are.
- if you know someone close to you who suffers or has died from smoking-related illnesses (eg, lung cancer), talk to your teen about it. Make him understand how sad it is that someone close to him suffers or dies from smoking-related illnesses, when it could have been prevented if he had listened and heeded about quitting.
- If you are watching a movie and you see actors and actresses who smoke, take the opportunity to talk about how the media falsely praises smoking.
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Open up to him / her and spend more time with him / her
- Talking with the adolescent on a regular basis about everything that happens in the world helps to address these types of problems and to be able to speak openly. Building a good relationship with them encourages them to share their problems with you. You have to let them have an opinion and not want to lower them if you do not explain to them where they are wrong, why and what they can do.
- Leaves let your friends come home and they stay there playing, talking… so you can meet them and see where the shots go.
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Be a good role model
- Don't you smoke then share your decision why you chose not to smoke.
- If you are a smoker, is the best time to quit smoking. If you can't do it alone, seek help and smoking cessation programs.
Do you suspect that your child has begun to experiment with tobacco?
don't judge him
- Find out why has it started to grope with tobacco and try not to ask him questions that sound like you're interrogating him. Paraphrasing them into an observation or making a comment like "Hey, I notice you've started smoking" sounds less accusatory.
- Listen to their point of view with an open mind and buy yours openly but without accusation. Telling each other about problems and solutions helps each other understand things and want to change the situation.
Be patient
- Pay attention when he wants to share his thoughts with you. Try not to interrupt or rush to comment on what you are talking about. Let him speak and express himself. Then offer suggestions rather than criticism. They are most effective in the long term.
- Is better don't be sarcastic with responses like "You're too young to understand" or "I don't care what your friends say."
- Nagging, yelling, threatening or using emotional blackmail just keeps him doing what he wants and on top of that he gets mad at you. What's more, it can hurt his feelings and make him want to smoke more, just to make you angry as you have made him angry.
- If he feels frustrated and angry while you're talking about it, don't go away or ignore it. Give him time to calm down.
be there for them
- pay attention to him when he complains about the pressure he feels on his peers to smoke. For you it may be easy and obvious that you do not have to play along, but for a teenager it may mean losing friendships (and they, at that moment, feel like losing their life). Try to make him see that real friends would not force him to do anything, nor would they discriminate against him for having a different decision in life.
- Suggest ways for her to decline cigarette offers without offending her friends. look at his personality. If your child is shy, he can say "No thanks, I don't like the taste" or make an excuse to leave. If your child is outgoing, he may laugh and say "I'm not doing it! It's not my style!"
- Remind him that can find and hang out with friends who don't smoke.
Helping your child quit smoking takes time, effort, and understanding.