Are you already mom and are you pregnant? The safest thing is that you consider that you will not be able to do it, even that you are afraid of "ceasing to love" your other child. Nothing is further from reality. Now you have more experience, and you can plan some things in advance.
The first question that may arise is how your child is going to take the arrival of a brother or sister, when should you tell them, how to organize afterwards. We give you some tips that can guide you.
Can children feel that their mother is pregnant?
There are pregnant moms who say that their children asked them, even before telling them anything, if they had a baby inside. We do not know if they can sense it or not, but the truth is that if you are very attached to your son or daughter and you start to feel worried, nervous or with some annoyances it is certain that you will notice. Although you may not know why.
Most of us wait for the first quarter to report, when the belly begins to notice. A little boy does not have the notion of time So it does not matter if you tell him that the brother will be born in 6 months than in 9.
Let your child touch the tummy or talk to the baby. You can take him to your prenatal appointments, see the ultrasounds and listen to the heartbeat of the brother. Rest assured that the child will not be aware of how his life will change after the baby is born, so do not try. Focus on creating a loving bond between siblings.
While I'm his pregnant mom how I treat him
For as long as you are his pregnant mom make him a participant in important decisions, the brother's crib, if they are going to share a room or are going to have their own, the name. You can take advantage of this period to fully enjoy your relationship with him. You can show him videos and photos of when he was inside your belly, when he was born, and how you prepared everything (like for the brother) for him or her, only you didn't have his help!
It is also a good time to detect how he is getting along with the people who are going to take care of him in the delivery and the birth of the brother. Let spend more time with your grandparents, uncles, aunts or friends who are going to help you.
Each boy and girl is a universe. But experts say that older siblings (even if they are also babies) experience a wide range of emotions. They go from delusion to jealousy, or resentment for the newcomer. Children under the age of three cannot verbalize their feelings, so their behaviors may change. They may go back to thumb sucking, wanting to take a nipple or bottle, or communicate using babies' own speech. She is claiming your attention, do not get angry or lose your patience with her or him. If it occurs, it is an absolutely normal reaction.
How do I organize myself during the birth?
You'll need family and friends They are willing to help you, so have their phone numbers handy and teach them whether or not they want to be told that their brother was born or just that he is on the way. There are couples who decide to share the moment of delivery with the other child. There are also men, parents who prefer to stay in the care of the other children, because it is a moment of authentic connection.
The first six to eight weeks are going to be especially demanding and exhausting. Share with your partner, and do not be proud when asking for help. You don't have to prove anything. You are still an excellent mother, lower your own expectations.
You can make your oldest child participate in this help, so he will feel like a participant in everything that is happening. You can check the temperature of the water, bring you a diaper, choose the pajamas or the clothes that the baby will be wearing. You can even ask him to sing to you to calm him down!