Being a mother and a woman today is a job that has no end, that never ends. It is proven that women who work inside and outside the home suffer from very high levels of stress and guilt. As if all the workload on them wasn't enough, they blame themselves for not being able to perform all their functions perfectly. Let's see how he is stress of being a mother and a woman.
The Perfect Woman
Society expects us to take care of our children as if we did not have a job, and to work as if we were not mothers. And that is completely impossible. We cannot work 36 hours a day. We are neither robots nor do we pretend to be. We are people with limited energy that have to be divided to be able to reach everything. And this external demand, together with the internal demand, causes stress to skyrocket.
When you get home from work, work continues unabated. Washing machines, dinners, baths, tantrums ... some juggling that takes the last energy you have left. There is no time left for oneself, we put ourselves in the background and put the automatic. Constant exhaustion leaves a feeling of mental burnout that takes its toll on the body.
The conciliation between work life and motherhood today is still a utopia unfortunately. And many women have to decide between the guilt of leaving their babies very young, or not being able to develop their professional careers.
Being a mother is difficult
If already in the world we are in, it is difficult to be a woman (glass ceilings, sexual discrimination, lower wages), it is even more so if we are also mothers. They send us signals of everything that needs to be done to be a good mother, a seed in your brain that if you don't do that, you are not doing it well. The pressure is constant.
We already know that continued stress affects our body and mind in a brutal way. In addition to affect our sleep, performance, concentration and energy, affects us in our digestions, increases headaches and muscle aches, and creates disease or worsens diseases that already existed.
We are not perfect
That is why it is very important that let's admit our limitations. That we realize that we have limited energies that we must manage. And that in all our obligations we cannot forget ourselves. Those of us who pull the cart, those of us at the foot of the canyon also need time for ourselves. A bubble bath, a good book, a glass of wine, dancing, playing sports. Give yourself moments for yourself, to disconnect, with things you enjoy. To connect with yourself again. To stop being the mother of and go back to being you.
Not all people express stress in the same way. There are people to whom it gives to eat, others on the contrary, to others it takes away the sleep and to others it gives it. We must learn to listen to our body to detect the traffic light of stress. Know how our body responds when we are stressed and at what levels. So we can stop before we get burned and it goes to more. If you cannot alone, do not hesitate to ask for professional help. A psychologist can help you better cope with stress and its symptoms.
Must stop being so self-demanding with ourselves. Stop trying to be the perfect mother, the perfect woman, and the perfect worker. Perfection does not exist. We will have to find a balance where we feel comfortable, distributing responsibilities at home, establishing priorities, distinguishing between urgent and not so urgent things, organizing ourselves well. Be more realistic with our expectations.
Congratulate yourself for everything you have achieved, do not whip yourself and relativize. Life is too short.
Because remember ... to get things to change outside, we must first start to change ourselves.