Being a partner of a man with children does not have to be a problem, as long as you understand that his children should always come first for him. In the same way that they would be for you, in the event that you are the one who brings children to the relationship. Maybe at some point you may think that it is too complicated, even many women refuse to go out with men who have children.
However, being a couple with a man with children can be a wonderful opportunity to find a responsible man, something that in many cases fatherhood brings. What's more, you can become an important figure in the lives of those children, without you having to be their mother. Now, from the first moment you need to be realistic with this type of relationship.
What is it like to be a couple with a man with children?
If he is a responsible man, the normal thing is that he spends as much time as possible with his children and that he misses them at all times. Namely, you have to assume that your partner will not be able to make plans spontaneously because you will always have to keep in mind your time schedule with your children. But instead of seeing this as something negative, remember that spending time with children means making fun and different plans, and that together you can enjoy things as simple as a picnic in the country or a day at an amusement park.
The most important thing is the well-being of the children
That they are not your children does not mean that you do not have to look out for the welfare of those little ones. That is, it is normal for you to demand attention from your partner, however, children should come first. In no case should you interfere in that man's relationship with his children, unless it is in a positive way. You will not become a mother, but you can be a friend and an ally for those little ones who will undoubtedly have difficulties with their parents, as we all do at some point in life.
Are you going to meet their children?
Children of separated parents already carry their little cross on them, it is normal that they have gone through moments of tension and that they are suffering because they do not have a united family. That is why it is very important to be responsible with these children. If your partner offers to introduce you to their children, before accepting you must consider yourself very seriously if you really want to have a future with your partner.
You cannot break into children's lives if after a few months the relationship is going to end. That will add suffering to the lives of those children, who may have become fond of you. Therefore, think very well if the relationship is on the right track and if you need to wait a while, speak honestly with your partner and postpone the time of the introductions.
Never speak ill of his mother
It is possible that your partner has had problems with the mother of his children, since in most cases relationships go through very painful phases before they finally break down. If your partner ventures to you and talks about the mother of his children, make sure it is in private and that these children do not find out about these things. But more importantly, you never make bad comments about his mother.
It does not matter if you think they are a better or worse person, or you empathize with your partner and their problems with her in the past. For those children, his mother is one of the two most important people in his life and therefore everyone must respect it above all things. Avoid adding suffering to the lives of these children, who are the least to blame for the situation they are experiencing.
Be patient with those kids
It will not be easy for them to accept that their parents are no longer together, and seeing other people enter their life will be a bit difficult at first. Do not force them, let them get to know you little by little and soon they will get used to it to this new reality. Being a couple with a man with children can be wonderful, you can have a very positive influence on those people and together form a beautiful family.