If you have a teenage son, you will surely have come across a problem like this on several occasions.. At certain times they shut down and there is no way to make them understand that this behavior will not serve them. But it is also something complicated for ourselves because we don't know which way to go.
So the time comes when you need a series of tips to put into practice. Remember that we should not take it personally, that is, a behavior towards us because on many occasions it is caused by what happens to them inside and around them.
Try not to do the same thing as your teenager
Dealing with them is not always a bed of roses, and we know it. But they are our children and we need to listen to them as well as understand them, just as they need to understand us. When they shut down and stop talking to us, it can be for various reasons. After a discussion, for example, it is one of the most recurrent as we well know. But remember that although certain things that have been pronounced in it have hurt you you should not maintain the same attitude as your children and you should speak when everything calms down or when you consider that the time has come. Communication is always one of the main resources that we must put into practice every day.
Listen to it and make a joint decision
What a teenage son usually asks loudly is that we take them into account, that we support his decisions even if they are somewhat crazy and that we treat them more like adults than children. Hence, in order to get out of that dumb situation, it is best that you listen to everything he has to say. Because sooner or later he will release it. After that, there will always be a good decision to make and this can be done together so that it has a happier outcome. Let him express what he considers and you finish shaping it so that it can be carried out.
don't judge them
When the youngest in the house stop talking to us, it is true that we tend to get angry or scream more than necessary because it really is an uncomfortable situation. But try to change this, even if it is not really easy. The best thing is that you listen to them and that they finish their arguments but without judging them beforehand.. Because this can make them feel insecure and ultimately they don't want to share with you what is happening to them or the plans that are going through their heads.
Let them know that everything has a consequence
They have to know that we are in control and they have to have respect for it. But that does not mean that things can be done together as a family. Hence, despite getting a little closer to them, letting them make their own judgments without us judging them, it is true that they must always be clear that there is something more. Because we are still their parents and certain moments they will know that facts like this could imply a consequence. It is not necessary to threaten, far from it, but it is necessary to explain to them that no matter how angry they get or stop talking to us, that attitude is not going to suit them and that they will be making the situation worse. We give you the advice, now you apply it in the way you prefer.
Give the confidence that your teenager is looking for
Although at this stage it is difficult for the vast majority to see us as 'friends', yes we can always earn their trust so that they know that they have us there when it comes to asking questions or letting off steam. Gaining the trust of a teenager is not always easy and we know it. But try to make him trust by putting all of the above into practice, in addition to the fact that when they tell us something we must keep it secret as they ask us. In this way they will see the loyalty that is always sorely lacking. And you, what do you do if your teenager stops talking?