Indibaniselwano phakathi kootatomkhulu noomakhulu kunye nabazukulwana idlula kwilifa lemfuza. Yakha ulwalamano olupheleleyo lweemvakalelo oluya kunceda umntwana ukuba akhule eziva edityanisiwe, ethandwayo, kwaye emanyene nesizukulwana apho afunda khona amaxabiso nothando.
Si bien es cierto que todos aceptamos la importancia de los abuelos en la vida de nuestros hijos, es común que en ocasiones nos surjan dudas. ¿Tienen nuestros padres y madres el deber de educar al igual que lo hacemos nosotros? ¿Dónde están los límites entre unos y otros? En «Madres hoy» te invitamos a conocer unos datos de interés con los cuales definir y obtener una visión más amplia sobre el tema.
Ngaba ootatomkhulu noomakhulu banoxanduva lokufundisa?
Siza kuqala ngomboniso olula oya kuthi wabelane nawo nathi: kubomi bomntwana, Sonke sisebenza njengabameli bezemfundo. Ukuqala nosapho, ngokuya esikolweni kunye noluntu ngokwalo ngokwamajelo eendaba afana nomabonwakude okanye i-Intanethi.
Yiyo loo nto, naluphi na ukhuthazo olufunyanwa ngabantwana bethu kufuneka luhlale lusenza ukuba sisityebi, sifundise kwaye sibe namaxabiso awaneleyo ukubaphembelela ngendlela elungileyo. Ngoku, ngaphakathi komxholo osondeleyo emntwaneni, thina kunye nootatomkhulu noomakhulu sisalathiso sakhe sokuqala.
Kananjalo asinakuyihoya indima yangoku yabasetyhini. Uxanduva lwethu ludlula ngaphaya kokukhulisa nokunakekela ikhaya: sigcina ubomi obusebenzayo oko kusinyanzela ukuba sichithe inani elithile leeyure kude nekhaya.
Ngeli xesha xa thina okanye amaqabane ethu singenakho ukuthatha uxanduva lwabantwana, phantse kuhlala kunjalo ootatomkhulu noomakhulu abafumana indima yokhathalelo kunye nengqwalaselo. Into ethi, ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo, sonke siyayixabisa.
Ngoku ... kufanele ukuba yintoni indima yakho?
- Kumbuzo wokuba ingaba ootatomkhulu noomakhulu bayafundisa na, impendulo nguewe. Nangona kunjalo, ezinye iinkalo kufuneka zifaneleke. Umzuzu wabo wokufunda njengootata noomama sele uyenzile injongo yawo. Ngoku indima yabo kukuba "oogogo nomkhulu."
- Olona xanduva lokumisela imigangatho, imithetho, ukuya, ukhathalelo, ukugcina kunye nokufundisa, yeyethu. Umsebenzi woomakhulu nootatomkhulu wahlukile. Bazimase, banike inkathalo kunye nothando, kodwa kwakhona, kubalulekile ukuba bacace malunga "Imithetho" thina, njengabazali, esinayo kwindawo yabantwana.
- Ukuba ekhaya sinomthetho wokuba singabukeli umabonwakude ngelixa sisitya ukukhuthaza incoko yosapho, kufuneka iqhubeke nokuzaliseka. Ukuba sinomthetho wokuba singaphumi siye kudlala esitalatweni emva kwesidlo sangokuhlwa, kufanele kuqatshelwe nakwizindlu zootatomkhulu.
- Kuyimfuneko ukuba akukho "ukungangqinelani" kwezemfundo xa useta izikhokelo zemihla ngemihla nabantwana. Yinto ekufuneka siyichaze ngaphambili nootatomkhulu.
Ubudlelwane beemvakalelo kunye nemfundo phakathi kootatomkhulu noomakhulu kunye nabazukulwana
Kungenzeka ukuba namhlanje, ugcina inkumbulo entle notatomkhulu nomakhulu wakho. Ilifa abasinike lona lisondele kakhulu kwaye liyakha.. Lilifa eligcweleyo livumba kunye neemvakalelo, zamabali asimanyanisayo kumthi wosapho.
Yinkumbulo eyakhiwe ngeCawa emva kwemini, ngezo ntsuku xa babesilanda xa sibuya esikolweni.. Iindawo eninqwenela ukuba abantwana bakho bazigcine kubazali bakho.
Masibone ngoku ukuba yakhiwe njani imfundo phakathi kootatomkhulu noomakhulu kunye nabazukulwana
1. Abantwana bafunda ukukhula, ootatomkhulu noomakhulu bakhumbula ubuntwana babo
Olu luhlobo lweemvakalelo kunye nokuzivelela kwezinto olusinyanzela ukuba sibonise. Njengoko besikhe satsho ekuqaleni, ootatomkhulu noomakhulu abanalo uxanduva "olusesikweni" lokufundisa. Sele benze njengabazali ngaphambili, ngcono okanye okubi, iimpazamo zabo okanye impumelelo sele yenziwe. Ngoku, ngootatomkhulu noomakhulu.
- Ulwalamano lwakho nabazukulwana bakho ubamema ukuba nabo bakhumbule ubuntwana babo kumzuzu wokuzivelela apho ukukhula kubanyanzela ukuba "bathathe isitokhwe". Yiyo loo nto ngamanye amaxesha sibona ukubavumela njani abantwana bethu ukuba basivumele, ubudlelwane babo nabo buya kwamkeleka, buthathaka kwaye busondele.
- Ngelixa ootatomkhulu noomakhulu bekhumbula ubuntwana babo, abazukulwana benza olo nxibelelwano lokuqala ukuya kubudala obuphakathi kwaye phambili. Abazali bethu luqhakamshelwano lwabo lokuqala nobuso apho iinwele ezingwevu zikanywa, apho imibimbi ivela kuncumo ngalunye nalapho ixesha liphawulwe kuwo onke loo mabali abaxelela wona ngaphambi kokuba balale.
- Ukuba ubudlelwane buhle kwaye bunomvuzo phakathi kootatomkhulu noomakhulu kunye nabazukulwana, abantwana bethu baya kubona ukukhula ngendlela esempilweni. Ndinqwenela mhlawumbi jonga njengotatomkhulu nomakhulu wakho xa ikubudala bakho.
Ngandlela-thile, kukho utshintsho olunobuncwane phakathi kwabo ekufuneka sibathandile.
2. Ilifa lobulumko
Siyacaca ukuba xa kufikwa kumba wokuguga, asenzi sonke ngendlela efanayo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba yenziwe ngokupheleleyo, ngendlela esempilweni kwaye uhlala ugcina umoya oqinisekileyo, ngekhe kubekho nto inomvuzo kwinqanaba losapho.
Ngale nto sithetha ukuba "Bakhona ootatomkhulu noomakhulu", kwaye ayinguye wonke umntu onokuzisa abantwana bethu elo lifa leemvakalelo, lisondele kwaye likhethekileyo esingalithanda. Ke, kufanelekile, kufuneka uzame soloko uphucula amaxesha amnandi.
- Ukuba ukhona ootatomkhulu ootatomkhulu oqhankqalazayo okanye ongqongqo ngandlela ithile, khokela umntwana ukuze azi indlela yokubaphatha kwaye angaziva esoyikiswa ngumntu ongqwabalala. Kufuneka siqinisekise, kangangoko sinako, ukuba abantwana bagcina iinkumbulo ezintle zoomawokhulu babo.
- Nangona uninzi lwethu lunotatomkhulu okanye umakhulu kusapho, esingavani ncam nabo, kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukuba ubudlelwane buvisisane kwaye bunomvuzo. Kuyimfuneko ke ngoko ukukhuthaza unxibelelwano phakathi kootatomkhulu noomakhulu kunye nabazukulwana, ubunzima obunokudalwa phakathi kwabo iya kubonelela ngexabiso elinamandla kakhulu emntwaneni.
- Abantwana abahlali nje kuphela ngabo bonke abo banokuthi baxelelwe. Ngaphandle koko, baya kudibanisa isenzo ngasinye kwimemori yabo, lonke igama abalibonayo ekhaya, iinkqubo zoomakhulu nootatomkhulu, iinkcukacha zabo ezincinci, amavumba aloo maqebengwana, okoku kutya. Kananjalo baya kukhumbula ukucofa kunye nokuncuma.
Ubudlelwane phakathi kotatomkhulu nomakhulu kunye nabazukulwana busekwe kubudlelwane beemvakalelo obuza kuhamba nabo kubo bonke ubomi babo.
Oomakhulu nootatomkhulu bafuna indawo yabo yobuqu
Oomakhulu noomakhulu banamhlanje bayasebenza "abasebatsha." Ukuba sithathela ingqalelo ukuba ixesha lokuphila liyanda, kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukuba banesidingo sokonwabela ixesha labo lokuzonwabisa, ubuhlobo babo, uhambo lwabo kunye nokukhula kwabo buqu ngemisebenzi abayikhethayo.
Siyazi ukuba uyabathanda abazukulwana bakho, kwaye uya kubakhumbula yonke imihla, kodwa kufuneka sithathele ingqalelo uninzi lwemiba:
- Kuphephe ukuzithwalisa umthwalo ongaphezulu. Abantwana banamandla amaninzi kwaye abazali bethu bafuna umgangatho wobomi owaneleyo apho iinzame zifanelekile.
- Ukukhathalela abantwana nako kubalulekile kubo: kubenza babe luncedo. Ngoku zama oko banendawo yabo yobuqu, Ixesha lakhe lokuhamba, ukudibana nabahlobo. Abazali bethu bakwelinqanaba apho kufuneka bonwabele usuku nosuku ngaphandle kokugqitha kolunye uxanduva.
Ukuqukumbela, njengomama, kubalulekile ukuba ukhuthaze ubudlelwane phakathi kootatomkhulu noomakhulu kunye nabazukulwana. Abaloncedo nje kuphela kwimisebenzi yemihla ngemihla yokhathalelo kunye nengqwalaselo. Abazali bethu baziingcambu zethu kwaye ezinye iintsika zigcwele uthando kunye neenqobo ezisemgangathweni, ezinokuthi zityebise abancinci.