Igama "ukufunwa okuphezulu kosana" lisenokukumangalisa ngaphezulu kwesihlandlo esinye. Nangona kunjalo, siya kukuqonda kwangoko ukuba Sizichaza njengezidalwa ezifuna ingqalelo engakumbi kuthi kunabanye, abalila kakhulu kwaye ngendlela enzulu kakhulu, ebiza kakhulu ukubazolisa kwaye, ngokubanzi, abasivumeli ukuba siphumle.
Kuya kufuneka siqonde ukuba ayizizo zonke iintsana ezifanayo, nanjengoko kungekho mntu unendlela efanayo yokuziphatha. Umntwana ngamnye unokwahluka kakhulu komnye nomnye, kangangokuba iyakothusa nawe ngokwakho. Nangona kunjalo, abantwana abaneemfuno eziphezulu bahlala bedala inqanaba eliphezulu loxinzelelo koomama. No sabemos qué quieren, qué les pasa… Y ello, puede llegar a ser agotador. En «Madres Hoy» queremos darte unas pautas para que no "Uyasilela kumzamo"
Iimpawu zabantwana abakwimfuno ephezulu
Njengoko besesitshilo ekuqaleni, into yokuqala ekufuneka siyiqonde kukuba usana ngalunye luya kuba neemfuno. Into yesibini ekufuneka uyigcinile engqondweni yile Iintsana ziyalila ngesizathu esithile Into yokugqibela ekufuneka siyenzile kukungabakhathaleli. Yimpazamo enokuba neziphumo ezibi.
Ukuba umntwana wakho uyakhala kakhulu, ungathandabuzi ukuya kugqirha wabantwana ukuze afumane isifo kwaye akhokele. Kuyimfuneko ukukhupha nayiphi na ingxaki yomzimba. Nje ukuba kucaciswe ukuba umntwana wethu akasokoli nasiphi na isifo, ofumana ukutya okufanelekileyo kwaye okhulayo njengoko kufanelekile, kubalulekile ukuba wazi iimpawu ezichaza iintsana ezinemfuno ephezulu:
- Ubunzulu: yonke into eyenziwa ngumntwana wethu yenziwa "ngamandla" amakhulu. Izikhalo zabo azithambanga, kodwa ziphakama njenge "siren" zokwenyani ezikoyikisayo, ezithi ngamanye amaxesha zikophule intliziyo uzibuze ukuba kuzakwenzeka ntoni kubo. Xa benomsindo bayenza ngendlela efanayo: kakhulu, ukwaphula izinto, ukuphosa izinto ...
- Uxinzelelo: ukungazinzi kwakhe luphawu kakhulu. Banqabile ukuba bayeke ngxi, kwaye oku kunokubonwa kubunzima babo bokulala, ngokungafuni ukuthatha i-naps, ekufuneni ukuchukumisa yonke into, ekufezekiseni izinto ezininzi ezibangqongileyo ...
- Imfuno yoqhakamshelwano: umntwana oneemfuno eziphezulu uya kukufuna ngamaxesha onke. Unokufumana ukukhululeka xa esezandleni zakho, kodwa kukumbuyisela ebhedini kwaye uqale ukukhala ngokungathandekiyo. Unoluvo lokuba awunako ukwahlukana naye. Kwaye oko kudala uxinzelelo, ixhala ...
- Zincanca rhoqo: Ngaba ufumana umbono wokuba abaze babonakale benelisekile? Zintsana eziwuxabisayo loo mzuzu, ezihlaziya ngokukhulu kwaye zihlala zisiza ngalamzuzu xa ubancancisayo okanye ubabhotile.
- Bavuka mzuzu ngamnye: unokuphinda ugcine umkhondo wenani lamaxesha avuka ngalo ebusuku. Kwaye leyo yinto oyiqaphelayo oko wayevela esibhedlele, oko wazalwa. Bangabantwana abalala ngamakhefu kwaye abaze "baxakeke"
- Andonelisekanga kwaye andinakulindelwa: Nantoni na oyenzayo ukuphazamisa okanye ukubaphumlisa ibonakala ngathi ayinampembelelo. Bayadika phantse ngephanyazo kwaye ngekhe wazi ukuba baya kusabela njani. Kunzima kakhulu ukuba uphume uhambe nabo, bathambekele ekutsaleni ingqalelo eninzi ngeenyembezi zabo, ngequbuliso ...
- Uvakalelo: Ngamanye amaxesha ufumanisa ukuba ukubanjwa nje kweempahla kubenza balile. Ingxolo ibavuse kwangoko kwaye bakwanobunzima bokwamkela incasa entsha kwisidlo. Bano "hypersensitivity" equka uninzi lweendawo zobomi bemihla ngemihla.
- Ebuthathaka ekwahlukaneni: le nto ixhaphake kakhulu kwaye iyinto edla ngokuhlupheka oomama Abayiqwalaseli kuphela kwaye bayasabela ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokubashiya kwindawo yokugcina abantwana, okanye nabanye abantu. Inyaniso elula yokubabeka ebhedini ebusuku nokucima isibane kuthetha ukuba bafuna ubukho bakho kwakhona.
Iindlela zokuba ngumzali kuBantwana abaPhezulu beMfuno
Into yokuqala ekufuneka siyicacisile kukuba asinakubekwa tyala ngayo nantoni na. Oomama abaninzi baye bakholelwe ekubeni ukuba abantwana babo bafuna okuninzi kubo kungenxa yokuba kukho into abangayenzi kakuhle. Kwaye ayisiyonto enjalo, kubalulekile ukuba sikususe oku kungazinzi ezingqondweni zethu, okanye uxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo esinalo luya kuba lukhulu.
Ukwenza oku, kuya kufuneka uthathe ezi ngcebiso.
- Unyana wakho akanangxaki: uxinzelelo lweemvakalelo lusebenza kwenye ingoma.
- Abantwana abakwimfuno ephezulu bafuna yonke into, kwaye yonke into itsala umdla wabo. Babone umhlaba ngendlela ebukhali ngakumbi kuba benovakalelo. Kwaye ayonto imbi, ukulawulwa ngokufanelekileyo kunokuzisa izibonelelo ezilungileyo.
- Umntwana oneemvakalelo ezingakumbi ngumntwana onomdla ngakumbi kwindawo yakhe. Imfuno ephezulu ngamanye amaxesha inxulunyaniswa nobuchule obuphezulu.
- Into abayifunayo kukuba siyazi ukuba siwaqonde njani kwaye singazomeleli ngakumbi kwiimvakalelo zabo ezingalunganga.. Ukuba uyakhala, ungaze umngxolise okanye uza kuliguqula elo bango lomntwana ukuze ubambe uloyiko, kwaye woyike ungamthembi.
- Mnike ukhuseleko kwaye uqonde ukuba umntwana wakho uziva ngolu suku ngokwahlukileyo. Unoloyiko lokuba uyakumshiya, uziva izibane, ingxolo imbi ngakumbi ... Uloyiko kunye neemvakalelo ziyadibana kuye ngendlela efanayo.
Nika ukuzola kwaye ulawule iimvakalelo ezingalunganga
Ukuba umntwana akaphumli, ukuba uhlala ekhala rhoqo, ukuba uneempendulo ezingalindelekanga, Into yokugqibela ekufuneka siyenzile kukuhambisa uxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo kubo. Bantwana, kholwani okanye anikholelwa, banomdla kwiimvakalelo zethu.
- Ubuso obunomsindo, amagama owomileyo kunye namazwi aphakanyisiweyo avelisa kubo uxinzelelo olufanayo, kwanoloyiko kunye nokungazithembi. Eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu kukusoloko uzolile, ukuzola kunye nothando olwaziyo ukusibekela imida.
- Ujongene nempendulo engafanelekanga, enjengokuphosa into okanye ukutsala iinwele zakho, uthi into ayenzileyo ayilunganga. Kuya kufuneka uyiqonde, kwaye ebusweni bokusabela okungalunganga akukho kulalanisa. Sukuhleka okanye ukulibale, kungenjalo banokusebenzisa iimpendulo ezingalunganga kwixesha elizayo ukuze baqwalasele.
Abantwana abaneemfuno eziphezulu bafuna ukhuthazo oluninzi
Ukufunwa okuphezulu kosana kugutyungelwe ziimvakalelo, kwaye enye indlela yokuzihambisa kukuphuhlisa umdla wakho wokufuna ukwazi. Nawuphi na umsebenzi omtsha unokuba sisicwangciso sokulawula inkxalabo yakho, ibango lakho leemvakalelo ...
- Ke gcinani engqondweni ukuba kunokwenzeka ukuba badikwe yinto ethile ngexesha elincinci, endaweni yoko "bathenge iithoyi ezininzi" Sebenzisa izinto ezenziwa ngesandla ezithatha ingqalelo yabo kwaye zikhuselekile.
- Mnike amathuba amatsha okufunda, makakubukele upheka kwindawo ekhuselekileyo, umvumele ukuba ankcenkceshele izityalo, atyale imbewu, umenze azive njengekhaya, kwaye ngokhuseleko nangokumvumela makaphonononge.
Abantwana abaneemfuno eziphezulu bafuna ukhuthazo kunye nesandla sakho njengesikhokelo sokujonga umhlaba.
Khathalela iimfuno zabo kodwa ngaphandle kokutyeshela ezakho
Usana oluneemfuno eziphezulu ludinga ixesha lethu elininzi, kwaye ngenxa yoko, kufuneka sazi ukuba sizicwangcisa njani izinto eziphambili ngokubaluleka. Ngoku, ungaze uzityeshele, kuba kungenjalo, ukuba awuphilanga, ngekhe ukwazi ukubonelela ngolonwabo nokhuseleko olufunwa ngabantwana.
- Yabelana ngoxanduva neqabane lakho.
- Evita abo bantu abathi ngandlel 'ithile bathumele uxinzelelo ngakumbi kuthi mihla le. Kuqhelekile, umzekelo, ukuba abanye oomama abayichazi loo nto "Kodwa yintoni le ililize unyana wakho, ngaba akasayenzi le naleya? Ayikho into ongayenzi kakuhle?" ... Ezi ntlobo zamagqabaza ziyingozi kwaye zonyusa uxinzelelo, ke thintela olu lwalamano kangangoko.
Nandipha ixesha lakho lobuqu, sukubeka bucala izinto ozithandayo, kwaye uqonde, ukuba umntwana wakho uya kukhula kwaye loo mini ngemini uya kuzimela ngakumbi. Ukuba umnika ukhuseleko, ingqalelo kunye nenkuthazo, uya kuba ngumntwana onomdla omkhulu oya kuziva kamnandi kunye nokuzithemba okuhle ekufumaneni ilizwe.