-Ungayichukumisi loo nto! ("Oko" yiplagi)
"Ayilumi."
"Kodwa awukwazi ukuhamba ezitalatweni wedwa."
"Sukuqala umatshini wokuhlamba."
"Aaaghh!" Ungayichukumisi loo nto! ("Oko" luhlobo olunzima)
Owu, onjani umthwalo. "Hayi hayi hayi hayi". Kwaye usazibuza ukuba kutheni umntwana wakho ethanda ukuthi "Hayi" amaxesha amaninzi? Akunzima ukuphendula. Kodwa makhe sibone Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuba uphile ngaphandle kuka "Hayi", oko kukuthi, ngaphandle kokubeka imida? Ngokuqinisekileyo akunjalo.
Ukubeka imida ngumntu: Zonke iiseti zeminqweno azihambelani. Ngelixa "ukuseta imida" kunokungavakali kuhle, imalunga nokwenza into osele uyenzile: ukungamvumeli umntwana wakho enze izinto eziyingozi okanye ezingafanelekanga kuye okanye kwabanye. Ukuseta imida esengqiqweni kuyindalo, ukuseta imida kwinto yokuba unguthetheli
Andifuni kuxolisa ngogonyamelo konke konke. Ndifuna ukunxibelelana neli nqaku ukuba ayenzi ngqondo kakhulu ukukhathazeka malunga nendlela endibekela ngayo imida, zingaphi, ziluhlobo luni, njl. kuba imalunga nento ethile ithuku. Kufuneka ucace gca malunga noko wethu siseko kunye Imilinganiselo esikholelwa kuyo kwimfundo yabantwana bethu.
Kodwa ndibeka ezingaphi?
Zininzi okanye zimbalwa njengoko indalo yomntwana wakho ifuna. Ukuba umntwana wakho unomdla kakhulu, kuya kufuneka uthethe amaxesha amaninzi kunokuthi "hayi" ... kuba ufuna ukusela isepha, chukumisa i-oveni eshushu okanye ufikelele kuloo mela imenyezelayo. Kodwa ngaba zikhona iintsana ezingenamdla wokufuna ukwazi?
«Ngamanye amaxesha umntwana uya kwenza le nto uyifunayo, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha uyakwenza le nto ifunwa ngumntwana, kwaye nokuba enye okanye enye ixhomekeke kuyo ixhomekeke kwiminyaka kwaye ixhomekeke kwiimeko. […] Abantwana banemida yendalo ngokupheleleyo, kwaye banemida ekufuneka ubanyanzele kuyo ngenxa yokhuseleko lomntu.UCarlos González
Iindidi zemida
Kukho okuninzi typologies yemida esekwe. Okwam - ngokusekwe kumava am njengomama omtsha nosana oluneenyanga ezingama-20- yile:
- Imida yokhuseleko
Yiyo leyo Zisebenza ukukhusela ingqibelelo yosana lwethu okanye eyabantu abakufutshane naye. Le mida ayinakuthethathethana. Awunakuze uvumele usana lwakho lubambe i-oveni eshushu okanye usele imveliso yokucoca, kwaye awuyi kumvumela agibisele amatye ukuba kukho abanye abantwana.
- Imida kubundlobongela
Kucacile, akunjalo? Abayifuni nenkcazo. Azinakuthethathethana nazo. Nakuphi na ukubonakaliswa kobundlobongela nangaluphi na uhlobo kugwetyelwe. Xa beziintsana kunokwenzeka ukuba babonakalise umsindo wabo ngokuluma okanye ukubetha, kufuneka sinxibelelane nokwala kwethu.
- Imida yezempilo
Ziyafana nezokuqala, kodwa ukuba Iziphumo yezo zikhawuleza, ezo zezi elifutshane, eliphakathi okanye elide. Ngaba ungaphuma ngaphandle kwengubo ebusika kuba ungafuni kuyinxiba? Ngaba unayo iilekese enye kunye nezintlanu? Ndiyathetha, ngaba ziyaxoxisana? Uyagqiba. Ngendlela: izigqibo ekuvunyelwene ngazo ngawo onke amalungu osapho ukunqanda ukungangqinelani. Kuya kufuneka uvavanye umonakalo (ukubanda, ukubola kwamazinyo, imikhwa emibi yokutya, njl.) Xa uthetha-thethana nabo.
- Imida ngamaxabiso
Zibalulekile. Nangona kunokubonakala ngathi yinto ephambili ukuba abanako ukuyiqonda xa beziintsana, kunyanzelekile banxibelelane ngolwimi olucacileyo kuba bayaziqonda, bayazibona kwizenzo zethu, bayabaxelisa ... bakhokela indlela abaziphethe ngayo. Kancinci kancinci baya kuhamba ukwenziwa kunye nokubanjwa kwabo. Zezo zinento yokwenza nayo ubumbano, ukunyamezelana, ukwala ukucalulwa, ukuhlonipha indalo, njl.
Kwaye ndenza njani?
Ndiyathemba ukuba uphinde waqinisekisa ngokufunda eli nqaku ukuba sele wenze kakuhle, kakuhle kakhulu. Kungenxa yokuba uyifundile le mihlathi mhlawumbi ngenjongo yokucinga ukuba uqhuba kakuhle na. Njani? Ngeekhrayitheriya, unyamezelo, ukhuseleko nothando. Kwaye umonde ngamanye amaxesha, ewe.
Ukubeka imida kukukhusela nokufundisa abantwana bethu. Kukukhusela ukuthembeka kwakho nokwabanye ngokusebenzisa amanyathelo okhuseleko, ukhathalele impilo yakho, ukwala ubundlobongela, ukufundisa ngexabiso.