Los Amaxabiso ayimfuneko ukukhokela indlela oziphatha ngayo kunye nokujonga indlela yakho. Yimigaqo esivumela ukuba sibe ngumntu ongcono. Bavumela umahluko phakathi kokulungileyo nokubi. Siyabulela kubo siza kufundisa abantu abanovelwano, abanonamathele kunye nabanembeko. Ziyimfuneko ukunxibelelana ngokufanelekileyo.
Ukucela ukuxolelwa ayisiyambeko nje, yenye ye Ezona zinto zibalulekileyo sinokuzidlulisela kubantwana bethu. Kwaye ezi zinto azifundwa esikolweni, kodwa ekhaya. Kwaye kubalulekile ukukukhokela kwinqanaba lakho lokuphila kwabantu abadala.
Kuthetha ukuthini ukucela uxolo?
Abantwana abaninzi abayazi indlela yokucela uxolo, kuba inxulumene nokwamkela impazamo, kwaye abayithandi loo nto. Kubangela ukuba bangonwabi kwaye bahlazeke. Kuya kufuneka bafundiswe ukuba ukucela uxolelo kunokuba yindlela yokuzama ukulungisa umonakalo owenziweyo kwaye ufunde kuwo.
Ukucela ukuxolelwa ngendlela ethobekileyo kuthetha ukuba singabantu kwaye asilunganga, nangona sifuna ukuphucula kwaye ngenxa yoko siyazamkela iimpazamo zethu. Siyayiqonda loo nto siyazixabisa iimvakalelo zabanye, phambi kwekratshi lethu eligqithisileyo. Sibeka ecaleni, kuba iyasithintela ekukhuleni nasekuphuculeni. Isusa kude nabanye. Isinika ikhaka lokhuselo elisebenza kuphela ukugcina ukuzigcina sikhuselekile.
Kutheni le nto kubalulekile ukuba ufundise abantwana ukuba bacele uxolelo?
ukuba bafundise ukuba noxanduva oluchanekileyo, kufuneka sifundise abantwana bethu ukuba bacele uxolelo kwaye yenzelwe ntoni. Ngamaxesha athile banokuyisebenzisa ngendlela enganyanisekanga yokubaleka isohlwayo, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha angakwazi ukuyithetha.
Kukho imigaqo-siseko embalwa ekufuneka ifundisiwe ekhaya ngemfundo. Sinika ukubaluleka kakhulu kumabanga, kodwa kuncinci kwimfundo yeemvakalelo. Kungumsebenzi wethu ukubethelela kubantwana bethu amaxabiso ahoywa kangaka namhlanje.
Ekuqaleni kuya kufuneka umkhokele xa esenza into engalunganga. Ngokukodwa ngabancinci (abangaphantsi kweminyaka emi-5 ubudala) abakufumanisa kunzima ukufumanisa ukuba benze into engalunganga kwaye abanasidingo sokuxolelwa. Kuya kufuneka ubeke imida kwinto onokuyenza kwaye ungabinakho ukuyenza. Ukususela kwiminyaka emi-2 sinokubafundisa ukuba bacele uxolelo.
Zeziphi iinqobo ezisemgangathweni eziphuhliswayo ngokufunda ukucela uxolelo?
Ixabiso esilihambisa ebantwaneni bethu ngokucela uxolelo zezi zilandelayo:
- umthwaloxa ucela uxolo sithatha iziphumo zezenzo zethu kwaye sithatha uxanduva. Abantwana banzima kule nxalenye.
- Intlonipho: Oko akuthethi ukubeka abanye phambili, kodwa ukuzixabisa wena kunye nabanye (uvelwano). Ngokucela uxolelo sibonisa imbeko kwiimvakalelo zomnye umntu, kananjalo nakuthi njengomntu owenza impazamo kwaye ngubani onokuyilungisa okanye abonise ukuzisola.
- Ukuqwalaselwa: sinoluqwalaselo kunye nomdla komnye. Khuthaza ukuhlala kunye kwaye uthanda ukuphuhliswa kobudlelwane bobuhlobo.
- Ukuthobeka: ngokwazi uku vuma impazamo.
Amanyathelo ekufuneka elandelwe ukuze bafunde ukucela uxolelo
Siphakamisa ukuba Isikhokelo esilula:
- Chaza ngokucacileyo ukuba yintoni abayenzileyo ephosakeleyo nokuba kutheni.
- Gxila kwiimvakalelo. Ukumenza ukuba azi ngakumbi ngomonakalo awenzileyo "wenze ukuba umntwana akhale." Menze azibeke endaweni yakhe kunye nendlela anokuziva ngayo.
- Mfundise iindlela zokucela uxolo. Ukongeza ku "uxolo", ungamanga, ubange ... ubakhuthaze ukuba balungise iimpazamo zabo. Ukuba ukhale umntwana ngokwaphula into yakhe yokudlala, mnike eyakho umzekelo. Mbonise izisombululo ezinokubakho.
- Musa ukumnyanzela. Ukuba akafuni ukucela uxolo, musa ukumnyanzela. Ungabanikezela kancinci, umzekelo "Ndiyamxelela ukuba uyaxolisa kwaye uyamwola, ucinga ntoni?" Ngale ndlela awuyi kuziva ulilolo.
- Makusuke entliziyweni. Ungayisebenzisi ngomatshini ukulahla isohlwayo okanye njengesiqendu esilula. Bakhuthaze ukuba bazifumanele impazamo kwaye banyaniseke.
- Mkhuthaze xa egqibile. Oku kuyakukhuthaza isimilo sabo ngendlela elungileyo.
- Yiba ngumzekelo wabo. Cela uxolo phambi komntwana xa usenza enye into. Uya kubona indlela ozibona ngayo iimpazamo zakho kwaye ufuna ukuphucula. Sisona sikhokelo sakho silungileyo, kwaye kufuneka siqale sizenzele. Ukuba umngxolisa ngokungafanelekanga okanye ngokugqithileyo, kuyakufuneka futhi uxolise kuye, mxelele ukuba uyazithathela ingqalelo iimvakalelo zakhe kwaye uza kuzama ukuqinisekisa ukuba ayiphindi yenzeke.
Izibonelelo ezininzi
Ukongeza kuzo zonke izibonelelo esele sizichazile ukuba ukucela uxolelo, ikwanayo isiphumo esihle kubo bobabini lowo ubanikayo kunye nalowo ubamkelayo. Lowo ubanikayo uziva ethe xibilili ngenxa yeentloni zento ayenzileyo kwaye lowo ubamkelayo uziva ethe xibilili xa iimvakalelo zabo zithathelwa ingqalelo.
Zonke ziluncedo, sonke siyakholelwa kuluntu ekuxabiseni ikhaya.
Kutheni ukhumbula ... Uxolelo lubonisa uthando. Fundisa ngokusuka entliziyweni.
Incwadi ekhuthaziweyo:
- Ibali elifutshane "Umthetho wehlathi elikhanyayo"