Inyaniso yeyokuba xa sithetha ngexesha elifanelekileyo lokuba nomntwana wokuqala, kule mihla yinto ezalanayo kakhulu kuba kuxhomekeke kwizinto ezininzi ukuba isigqibo, nokuba ufuna ngokwenene ukuba ngumama okokuqala. Amabhinqa amaninzi afuna ukuba ngoomama aziva ephantsi komsebenzi, ngexesha elincinane analo, ngoloyiko lokuphelelwa ngumsebenzi ngenxa yokukhulelwa, luxinezeleko olunokubangelwa kukuba nomntwana, ukuba kubiza kangakanani ukuba ngumama nokuba ngumama. uncedo oluncinci olufunyanwa ngoomama kwilizwe lethu.
Kwelinye icala, kukho abafazi abathi, nangona besenokuba ngoomama Bagqiba kwelokuba bangabi njalo ukuze babe nobomi obuzolileyo, ukuba ungadibanisi naliphi na iqabane, ukuba ungahambi naluphi na unyango lokuzala, ukuba ungachithi imali, ukwazi ukunyuka kwinqanaba lomsebenzi kunye nokunye okuninzi okunobuntu kakhulu ngokobomi bomntu ngamnye.
Ngokwam, kwafika ixesha lokuba ndibe ngumama xa unyana wam wagqiba ekubeni angene emhlabeni. Hayi phambi nasemva. Ngokuba Kukho amaxesha apho umfazi uyazi xa ixesha lilungile., ngenxa yokuba nangona kungena uloyiko oluthile nokungaqiniseki, entliziyweni yakho, uyazi ukuba ixesha lifikile.
Kodwa, ngokweminyaka, liliphi ixesha elifanelekileyo lokuba nomntwana wakho wokuqala? Yeyiphi iminyaka echanekileyo kwimeko nganye?
Iminyaka engcono kakhulu yokuba nomntwana wokuqala
Kukho abantu abacinga ukuba Ubudala obugqibeleleyo bokuba nomntwana wokuqala buphakathi kweminyaka engama-25 nama-29 ubudala.. Eli xesha linento yokwenza nentlalontle ekubeni kule minyaka ngokwemigaqo kunye nokulandela imilinganiselo yentlalo yoluntu lwethu, abantu ngeli xesha lobomi babo baya kuba sele benomsebenzi kunye nokhuseleko lwezoqoqosho.
Kodwa namhlanje ezi datha zinokuzalana kakhulu kuba kule minyaka kukho amagqiyazana amaninzi asahlala kwikhaya labazali babo ngenxa yokungakwazi ukuzikhulula ngenxa yokungakhuseleki komsebenzi okukhoyo kuluntu lwethu, into engathandabuzekiyo eya kwenza ukuba ukuzalwa. umlinganiselo uyancipha phakathi kwamabhinqa namadoda amaninzi afuna ukuba ngabazali kodwa abanemali yentsapho engabavumeli oko.
20, 25, 30 okanye 0 iminyaka?
Baninzi abantu abakholelwa ukuba elona xesha lilungileyo lokuqalisa ukuba nabantwana yiminyaka engama-25 ngenxa yezizathu endizikhankanyileyo apha ngasentla, kodwa kukho nabo bacinga ukuba eyona minyaka ingcono yi-20 yeminyaka kuba unamandla amakhulu kunye neminyaka emininzi ngaphambili. .
Kodwa kule mihla, ukuba mdala kuma-20 kusenokungafiki engqondweni kubantu abaninzi. Bangaphi abantu abatsha kule minyaka engekakhuli kakhulu ukuba bangakwazi ukuzinyamekela? Ngaba bekuya kufaneleka ukuba bayenzele usana? Kwezi meko, njengakuninzi Ukukhulelwa kolutsha kuya kuba ngabazali abagqibela ngokunyamekela abazukulwana kwaye oku akuyi kuba licebo elihle kumntwana ofuna abazali bakhe.
Ngaphezu koko, abantu abaselula abaninzi abakule minyaka abakayifumani imisebenzi, ngoko abanakukwazi ukondla usana ukuze balunike zonke iimfuno ezisisiseko ezifunwa ngumntwana.
Kodwa ngokobuqu Ndicinga ukuba le minyaka yokuba ngumama okokuqala iyahluka ngokuxhomekeke kwinqanaba lemfundo yabantu okanye inkcubeko abakuyo.. Kukho abantu abakhula becinga ukuba bamele balinde iminyaka engaphezu kwama-25 ukuze babe nabantwana, abanye bafanele bachithe iminyaka engama-30 okanye kwanama-35 ukuze bakwazi “ukuphila ubomi ngaphambi kokuba babe ngabazali.”
Kodwa kwakhona kufuneka siqaphele ukuba kusekho iinkcubeko ezikholelwa ukuba abafazi kufuneka babe ngoomama ngokukhawuleza ngaphandle kokucinga ngeemfuno zabo njengabasetyhini, kodwa bacinge kuphela ngabo ngenjongo yokuzala. Into engenamathandabuzo, ndinethemba lokuba ngenye imini le ndlela yokucinga iya kutshintsha ekubeni kukho amabhinqa amaninzi ehlabathini amele aphile ngokukhululekileyo aze akwazi ukuzenzela izigqibo.
Nangona kunjalo Iminyaka efanelekileyo yokuba nomntwana wokuqala isazalana kakhulu., kuba kuya kuxhomekeka kwimeko yentlalo kunye nenkcubeko ukuba ngaba umntu ukhetha ubudala okanye enye.
Izinto ekufuneka uzigcine engqondweni
Kukwabalulekile ukuqaphela ukuba kukho abasetyhini abafuna ukuba ngoomama besebancinane kakhulu kodwa ngenxa yeziphi na izizathu baye bathintelwa ukuba bakwazi ukwenza oko besebancinane, kwaye bengakwazi ukukhetha, iminyaka iyahamba kwaye abanakuba ngoomama. Uninzi lwaba bafazi Baphela besiya kwiiklinikhi zokuzala ukuze bakwazi ukubanceda babe ngoomama, into engazuzwa ngokuphazima kweso. Ngenxa yesi sizathu, kukho abasetyhini abathi, nokuba bafuna ukuba ngoomama, kufuneka balinde ixesha elide kwaye banokuba ngoomama abangaphezu kweminyaka engama-35 kwaye basondele okanye badlule okanye badlule kuma-40.
Kuyinyani ukuba ukuba nabantwana kwiminyaka engama-20 namhlanje akunaxanduva ngokupheleleyo ukuba awunazo iindlela ezifanelekileyo, kodwa ngokwasemzimbeni bubudala obufanelekileyo kuba unamandla ayimfuneko ukuhlala nabo ngalo lonke ixesha ngaphandle kokuziva udiniwe kakhulu.
Ukongeza, nokuba unobudlelwane obuzinzileyo okanye awunabo na kubaluleke kakhulu. Kukho amabhinqa akhaliphileyo agqiba ekubeni abe ngoomama abangenamaqabane, yaye nangona kuyinyani ukuba kuntsonkothe ngakumbi ngokwezoqoqosho nangokweemvakalelo, ngakumbi nangakumbi abafazi bagqiba kwelokuba bangene kwihlabathi lobumama ngaphandle koyise okanye iqabane elizinzileyo.
Kwaye wena, ucinga ntoni ngayo? ¿Ucinga ukuba kubhetele ukuba nabantwana abaselula? Okanye ukuba kungcono ukuphila ubomi kwaye uyonwabele ngelixa unako kwaye ube ngabazali ukusuka kuma-30 okanye angama-35? Ucinga ukuba namhlanje izinto zixakile kuluntu lwethu ukuba sikwazi ukuba ngabazali? Abantu abanokukhetha ngokwenene banethamsanqa, kuba kukho abafazi abaninzi kunye nezibini ezininzi ezingakhethiyo, balinda nje iindaba ezilinde ixesha elide ukuba zifike ekugqibeleni ukuba umntwana usendleleni.