Ndinoluvo lokuba ukubhala amanqaku ngootata, oomama, ukuba ngumzali, kunye nezitayile zemfundo ngoku sele kuyinto eqhelekileyo. Kodwa kufike inqaku apho ndibona khona zonke ezi zithuba kunye nazo zonke ezi mbono zigqithileyo. Ndiyayiqonda lonto ootitshala, abahlohli kunye neengcali boyike yinto ebizwa ngokuba yi-hyperpaternity (ukukhusela abantwana ngokugqithileyo) kodwa kukho iimeko ezinokuthi zibexiwe kakhulu.
Umzekelo, singenise umxholo womsebenzi owenzekileyo wesikolo. Ngaba iintsapho zikwiqela le-hyperpaternity ukuba bafuna ukunceda abantwana babo ngomsebenzi wesikolo? Ndicinga ukuba ukufikelela kwesi sigqibo, imeko yosapho ngalunye kunye nomntwana ngamnye kuya kufuneka ihlalutywe. Kodwa andiqwalaseli ukuba bonke abazali abanceda abantwana ngomsebenzi wesikolo kufuneka babhalwe kwelo qela. Kwenzeka ntoni ke?
Lungisa isixa somsebenzi wasekhaya
Xa ndidlula kubamelwane bam abancinci emnyango ndihlala ndithanda ukubabuza ukuba injani imini. Baphantse bahlala bendixelela into enye: «Jo, Mel, sithunyelwe ezininzi umsebenzi wasekhaya. Kwaye ke kufuneka sifunde. Kukho ootata noomama abo Bacele ootitshala ukuba banciphise umsebenzi wasekhaya kodwa khange bafumane nto. Kwaye bafikelele kwinqanaba lokuba bangazi ukuba mabenze ntoni.
Kwaye abayazi ukuba mabenze ntoni kuba bayababona abantwana babo xa bephuma esikolweni kude kube (amaxesha amaninzi) phantse ixesha lesidlo. Ngenxa yoku, abazali abaninzi bagqibe kwelokuba bancede abantwana ngomsebenzi wesikolo ukuze babe nexesha elingakumbi lokwenza oko bakuthandayo. Ngaba yi-hyperpaternity? Andicingi njalo. Ndiyakholelwa ukuba ingxaki esisiseko ayiloncedo lwabazali. Kodwa umsebenzi wesikolo omninzi kakhulu.
Ukunceda abantwana ngomsebenzi wesikolo ayikukhuseli ngokugqithisileyo
Umsebenzi wasekhaya ngowokuba abafundi baphonononge umxholo kwaye bawufundise. Ngokunokwenzeka, eli binzana lithethwa ngabanye ootitshala noonjingalwazi. Kodwa ukugqithisa kwemisebenzi ephindwayo ayincedi abafundi nakwintoni na. Kukho amakhulu emisebenzi yokuphononongwa enokuba luncedo kubafundi (imidlalo ye-neuroeducational, ukukhangela amagama, amagama aphambili, imidlalo kumaqonga ezemfundo kwi-Intanethi ...).
Ndiyathandabuza kakhulu ukuba abazali banceda abantwana babo ngomsebenzi wesikolo ukubakhusela. Ndiyathandabuza kakhulu ukuba bayayenza ukuze bangenzi mgudu kwaye ke banembopheleleko ezimbalwa (Lumka, anditsho ukuba akukho bazali bayenzela loo nto, kodwa andicingi ukuba ngumgaqo jikelele) Kwaye ndiyathandabuza kakhulu ukuba abazali banceda abantwana babo ngabazali kuba ababoni benakho.
Ke ngoko, kum akukho ngxaki xa abazali benceda abantwana ngomsebenzi wesikolo xa bebona ukuba imisebenzi igqithile kwaye abanakuba nalo ixesha labo. Kodwa ukunceda ngomsebenzi wesikolo awuthethi ukuba abazali benze imithambo yabantwana babo. Kuthetha ukuba bakhona ukusombulula amathandabuzo anokuvela.
Kwaye kwenzeka ntoni xa hyperpaternity yenzeka?
Njengoko benditshilo ngaphambili, kunokubakho iimeko zabazali abathintela abantwana babo ekwenzeni iinzame. Ewe bakhona abazali abazikhusela ngokugqithisileyo ngokuphepha naluphi na uhlobo lokusilela okanye unxunguphalo. Kwaye kukwakho nabazali abanokunceda abantwana babo ngomsebenzi wesikolo ngenxa yokoyika iimpazamo, iimpazamo okanye kuba behamba kancinci kakhulu. Kwezo meko, kunokuthiwa i-hyperpaternity iyenzeka.
Kukho abazali abafuna (kwaye banqwenele) ukuba abantwana babo bafezeke. Lo mnqweno uya kude ube nakho ukwenza umsebenzi wasekhaya ukuze ootitshala babone inqanaba lemfundo kunye nobukrelekrele babantwana. Ngamanye amaxesha, kukho abazali abaye bavutha ngumsindo ngootitshala ngokubona iimpazamo kwiziphumo zokuzilolonga abo babekuxelele abantwana babo.
Ngale ndlela, abazali benza abantwana bakholelwe ukuba ukungaphumeleli yinto embi kwaye abanakuze benze iimpazamo. Kwaye xa besenza, unxunguphalo olukhulu lwenziwe kubo olunokwenzeka ukulawula. Ungayichazanga imvakalelo yokungonwabi, ukoyiswa kunye noxinzelelo oluzama ukuba ngogqibeleleyo kungunobangela.
Inzame ikhona ngoncedo lwabazali
Ngamafutshane: andikuthatheli ngqalelo ukunceda abantwana ngomsebenzi wesikolo ukuba bangaphezulu. Ukuba abazali bandixhasa nje, andiboni ukuba ingxaki ikuphi.
Ukubonelela ngomsebenzi wesikolo akuthethi ukuba abantwana akufuneki bazikhathaze.
Ngaphezu koko, abazali abaninzi basebenzisa umsebenzi wesikolo ukuze abantwana bafunde baphande okanye bafune ulwazi bebodwa. Ngale ndlela, bayakhuthaza izakhono zokuhlalutya, ukucinga nzulu kunye nokuyila. Kwaye kubonakala kulungile kum ukuba abazali bancede abantwana babo baphuhlise la magama.