Ungathini kum xa ndikuxelela ukuba kwilizwe lethu umama Amnyanzele ukuba ahlukane nosana lwakhe lweenyanga ezili-15 kuphela, anyhasha amalungelo abo bobabini, kodwa ingakumbi incinci esafuna iingalo zonina nobisi? Ungathini kum xa ndiqhubeka nokubala kwaye ndicacisa ukuba uNerea (umama) ungene entolongweni? Ndithetha ngomntu owayekhe walixhoba lobundlobongela obuphathelele kwezesini, kodwa ngoku ukhonza izigwebo ezibini zokubetha iqabane lakhe langaphambili kunye nokwaphula umthetho othintelayo.
Phambi kokuba ndiqhubeke, ndiza kukuxelela ukuba ndizifundile ezinye zezimvo ezikhuthazweyo zezi ndaba kwaye bendididekile: "ukuba usejele, inokuba wenze into egwenxa", "usana luza kuba nomntu wokukhathalela. ngaye, akunjalo? ”. Ngelishwa uluntu lwethu luqwalasele umbono wokungabikho kokusesikweni ngendlela echaphazela thina ukuba bakude kakhulu okanye ukuba umntu othile okusingqongileyo uyasokola; Yiyo loo nto siba nohanahaniso kwaye singakhathali (singasathethi ke ngokunyamezelana nolwaphulo-mthetho kunye nokuchasana kwimeko yolwaphulo-mthetho oluncinci). Kodwa ukuba uhlalutya ityala likaNerea, uyayiqonda loo nto Kuyinyani ukuba uBulungisa abuboni, becinga ukuba bukhona.
Andifuni kuphoswa lithuba lokubonisa inkxaso yam kulo mama: UNerea unonyana oneenyanga ezili-15 ubudala, isiphumo sobudlelwane bakhe neqabane lakhe langoku, unenkwenkwe eneminyaka eli-13 ubudala: ukuba ndifunde nawe unayo ulutsha ekhayaUyazi kakuhle ukuba kwinqanaba lokufikisa lixesha apho amakhwenkwe namantombazana bafuna abazali babo kwakhona, kodwa ndiza kuyishiya apha. Kodwa ngoku akasayiboni ifamily yakhe, ngaphandle kwaoko unikezwe iv.
UNerea: ugwetyelwe ukwahlukana nosana lwakhe
Ukuba ulibhinqa olixhoba lobundlobongela obuphathelele kwezesini, uku kumaphephandaba: kulungile kuba ubethiwe (okanye nokuba mandundu), kulungile kuba uziva ungafuni ukurhoxa, kwaye umelane nobunzima, UNerea ungoweqela lesibini. Sele kuyiminyaka emihlanu okoko kwathiwa makuthotyelwe umyalelo kuye (kunye neqabane lakhe): yayibuhlobo obunobungozi obunobundlobongela. I-protagonist yethu yayingalunganga, kodwa inyani kukuba azikho iindlela ezifihlakeleyo ezingenakuhoywa: ingxoxo enobundlobongela kunye nobundlobongela xa aba babini badibana esitratweni baphela benetyala, eyokuqala kwezi zibini azalisekisayo.
Into exakayo kukuba ubundlobongela awayebuva ngaphambili babungathathelwa ngqalelo ngokusemthethweni "njengobuni", kodwa lusapho
Ngexesha elidlulileyo, uNerea kuye kwafuneka abhenele kunyango lwengqondo kuba kukho ubudlelwane obathi, nangona busenza umonakalo, babangela ukuxhomekeka okuthile, wenza nomsebenzi woluntu. Ixesha elidlulele usapho olutsha ixhaswe kukhuseleko iqabane lakho lwangoku elikwazi ukukunika lona.
Kwaye apha ayikuko ukukhuthaza inceba, imalunga noBulungisa (ngoonobumba abakhulu) kwaye amanyathelo anokuvumela umama nonyana ukuba bahlale kunye ayichazwanga ixesha lesigwebo. Ngenxa yokuba iinyanga ezili-17 zokuhluthwa inkululeko eza kuzalisekiswa nguNerea, ngenxa yomntwana omncinci onjalo, ingunaphakade, nangaphezulu, akukho ndlela yokuba asiqonde isizathu okanye indlela yokuhlengahlengisa imeko. Ngale nto siyaziyo namhlanje malunga nokukhula komntwana, kunye neziphumo zokwahlukana nomama, isidingo sokuba bahlale kunye singaphezulu kokuthethelelwa.
UNerea González ungene kwintolongo yaseVillanubla, kwaye uya kuzibuza "kodwa ingaba abantwana abangaphantsi kweminyaka emi-3 ubudala abanakubakho noonina abasentolongweni?"; Ewe kunjalo: uMmiselo weNtolongo ubeka ilungelo elinjalo, okwenzekayo kukuba intolongo apho akhonza khona isigwebo ayinayo imodyuli eyenziweyo. Oko kukuthi, siyaya (kwaye kuya kufuneka nditsho ngokungakhathali, ngaphandle kwamaqela kunye neenkcazo zenkxaso kwiRRSS kunye nebhlogosphere) ekwaphuleni umthetho kungekuphela nje kwamalungelo abantu, kodwa nakwisiqhelo ngokwawo.
Usana olungenamalungelo
Kulo Isibheno esidlangalaleni esifakwe nguMonica F. kwiAvaaz, kuxeliwe ukuba kule meko, lo mama nolu sana abaxhamli kumalungelo ekufuneka eqinisekiswe ngabasemagunyeni "ukuqinisekisa" inkqubela phambili yengqondo yomntwana osemncinci ", ngaphandle kokubala 'ekugwetyweni' kokwahlukana uqobo, kwaye ukuncancisa kuphazamisekile. Ukuncancisa, lona lilungelo elaziwayo leentsana, ekufuneka (kufanelekile) lifumane ubuncinci ukuya kuthi ga kwiinyanga ezingama-24, kudityaniswe nokondla okuncedisayo; kodwa ikwabonelela ngezinye izibonelelo ngaphandle kokutya, njengokugcina ibhondi, okanye ukuhlangabezana neemfuno ezithile zeemvakalelo.
Xa kukho ezinye iindlela, kuya kufuneka uzikhangele
Okanye ngaba sihlala ngokwenkqubo esisekela yona? Kuthekani ukuba amaziko oluntu aphosakele kwizigqibo zawo? Yiyo loo nto kuceliwe uxolelo, oluye lwaliwe, yiyo ke loo nto ngoku iBhodi yoNyango lwamaTyala isiGanga sesithathu (senkululeko-yenkululeko); Kungenxa yokuba akukho ntolongo asebenza kuyo isigwebo sakhe, okanye esona sisondeleyo (esi kuba sasivalwe ngenxa yokusikwa), sinemodyuli yokubeleka.
Eli nqanaba lesithathu liyakwenza ukuba uNerea enze isigwebo sakhe sonke kwiZiko lokuDityaniswa kwezeNtlalontle, kwaye oko bekungayi kuthetha ukwahlulwa kosana, ukongeza kwinto yokuba ukubuyisela kwimeko yesiqhelo kuya kuba sengqiqweni, kuba umsebenzi wentlalontle uvumelekile. Kwaye irekhodi, ngelixesha ndibhale isivakalisi sokugqibela bendicinga ukuba emva kweminyaka emihlanu emva kweziganeko ezichazwe ekuqaleni, kunye nosapho olutsha, kungathathelwa ingqalelo ukuba uNerea ubuyiselwe kwimeko yesiqhelo, kwaye waphinda wafakwa; kodwa nangayiphi na imeko, Ukuba ukuhambisa isigwebo kunokuxolelaniswa nokukhathalela umntwana, kutheni ungenzi njalo?
Andifuni ukuhlawula ukuba ukusetyenziswa komthetho kungalingani kangako kumatyala ahlukeneyo, kwaye andifuni ukujonga kude kukungabikho kokusesikweni kukaNerea nosana lwakhe; Y Andifuni ukuyenza kuba ndizibeka ezihlangwini zabo kwaye ndiyahlupheka, kuba ndikwanabo abantwana xa babeneenyanga ezili-15 ubudala kwaye ndiyazi kakuhle ukuba bafuna kangakanani umama wabo. Andifuni kufuna iinkcazo okanye ukulungiswa, kuba ndikwicala lomfazi ofuna ezinye iindlela (kunye nokusetyenziswa komthetho ngokusekwe kwimeko ekhethekileyo); Kwaye kuba ndiyakholelwa ukuba usapho lwangoku sele lonakele ngokwaneleyo ngokwahlukana ukwenza imeko ibe mbi nangakumbi.
Ukuba unomdla, unokulandela ukuvela kweli tyala kwi-hashtag #YoSoyNerea, okanye kwiprofayile e Iqonga leNkxaso kuFacebook.
Via - Funda kwisibeleko
Umfanekiso - EPEN