Ubomi buhlala bunemiqobo kwaye abantwana kufuneka bafunde ukuba yinxalenye yobomi ukujongana nezi ngxaki. Usabela njani umntwana wakho xa esenza impazamo okanye efumana ingxaki? Mhlawumbi xa uphulukana nomdlalo webhodi okanye usilele uviwo, awazi ukuba ungalunyamezela njani unxunguphalo.
Kuxhomekeka kwimeko kunye neemeko, abanye abazali banokuthi basabele kubumva babantwana babo ngokubathuthuzela okanye ukukhathazeka kakhulu kwaye bazame ukulungisa okubachaphazelayo. Kodwa oku akunamkhethe. Kuyenzeka ukuba abazali nabo babe nomsindo ebantwaneni babo okanye babek 'ityala kwabanye ngokusilela kwabantwana, into engengombono ulungileyo nayo.
Indlela abasabela ngayo ichaphazela abantwana bakho
Impendulo yakho kwiimpazamo zabantwana bakho iya kuba nefuthe elihle nelingapheliyo kwindlela abayenza ngayo impazamo. Abantwana bakho baya kuncipha okanye baya kuncipha kwaye baya kuba nokuzithemba okungakumbi kunye nokuzithemba kuxhomekeke kwindlela osabela ngayo kwiimpazamo zabo. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba kwanombono wobukrelekrele bomntwana unokumiselwa.
Abaphandi kwiYunivesithi yaseStanford bafumanise ukuba umzali xa ejonga ukusilela kunye neempazamo zomntwana njengezintle okanye ezimbi zinokubumba iinkolelo zomntwana malunga nobukrelekrele kwaye, zichaphazele ikamva labo. Iinkolelo zabantwana malunga nobukrelekrele zinempembelelo enkulu kwindlela abaqhuba ngayo.
Abaphandi babuze i-73 yomzali nomntwana ngababini uthotho lwemibuzo enxulumene nokusilela kunye nobukrelekrele; abantwana ibingabafundi abaphakathi kweminyaka eli-9 neli-11 ubudala. Ngelixa iziphumo zingakhange zibonise unxibelelwano phakathi kweenkolelo zabazali malunga nobukrelekrele kunye noko bacinga ngabantwana babo malunga nobukrelekrele, bekukho unxibelelwano phakathi kweembono zabazali kubukrelekrele neenkolelo zabantwana malunga nobukrelekrele.
Kutheni lento isenzeka? Abaphandi bakholelwa ukuba inento yokwenza nomyalezo othunyelwa ngabazali kubantwana ngolwimi olungathethi nto. Umzekelo, abazali abaphendule ngoxinzelelo kunye nexhala ngenqaku lovavanyo olusezantsi banokudlulisela umyalezo ebantwaneni babo ukuba abayi kuba bhetele kuba abanangqondo ngokwaneleyo kwaye umgudu awufanelekanga. Kodwa abazali abagxile koko kunokufundwa ngumntwana kumanqaku ovavanyo angalunganga banokunika abantwana babo umyalezo wokuba ubukrelekrele abuzinzanga, kwaye banokuphucula amanqaku abo ngokufunda kunye nokuzama.
Yintoni ongayenza ukuze abantwana bakho bafunde kwiimpazamo
Kufuneka uthathele ingqalelo into onokuyenza ukuze uqiniseke ukuba abantwana bakho banomyalezo ofanelekileyo ovela kuwe kwaye bafunda kwiimpazamo. Ukusilela ayilophawu lokuba awunakho ukusebenza okanye ukuba awukrelekrele kangako, ukude kuyo. Impazamo ihlala sisixhobo esomeleleyo sokufunda ekufuneka sisetyenziswe ngobulumko. Ngexesha elizayo umntwana wakho xa esenza impazamo, Kuya kufuneka uthathe ingqalelo kwezi mpendulo.
Jonga indlela asabela ngayo umntwana wakho
Landela umzekelo wokuphendula komntwana wakho kwaye ucinge ukuba kuthetha ntoni kanye kanye. Ukuba unomsindo ngokusilela okanye ukuba wonwabile kuba nokuba awuphumelelanga, wenze konke onako kunye nezinto onazo ezandleni zakho. Ukuba unomsindo, kuya kufuneka umncede athumele loo mvakalelo ukuze iyijike ikhuthaze ukwenza izinto ngcono kwixesha elizayo.
Gxila kwikamva
Endaweni yokuthetha ngento oyenzileyo engalunganga, kuya kufuneka ujonge kwindlela onokwenza ngcono ngayo kwixa elizayo. Khumbuza umntwana wakho malunga nento engahambanga kakuhle kwaye umbone ukuba sisixhobo esihle sokufumanisa ukuba makenze ntoni okanye angenzi ntoni kwikamva kwaye ufumane iziphumo ezingcono
Yiba ngumqwalaseli wakho
Yiba nomfanekiso ngqondweni wakho ungumntu obukeleyo, ubona indlela osabela ngayo kwimpazamo eyenziwe ngumntwana wakho. Ngaba ucinga ukuba lo mntu unobubele kwaye unike umntwana wakho ingcebiso eluncedo? Ngaba ucinga ukuba lo mntu uthetha ngendlela efudumeleyo kwaye ekhululekile? Okanye ngaba iyavakala irhabaxa, igxeka okanye imbi? Khawufane ucinge ukukhuthaza endaweni yokudimazeka ...
Amandla umzamo kwaye hayi kangako umphumo
Thetha nabantwana bakho malunga nento abayenzileyo kwaye ukuba kukho nantoni na abangayithandiyo okanye abacinga ukuba banokwenza ngcono kwixesha elizayo. Nceda umntwana wakho ajonge amandla akhe ukuze kwixesha elizayo ajolise kwinkqubo nakwizame. Ukonwabela le nkqubo kubalulekile ukuze ube nakho ukwaneliseka okukhulu kwimfundo yemihla ngemihla.
Ungabi nosizi ngayo
Xa uzama ukuthuthuzela umntwana wakho, musa ukuba buhlungu kuba uya kucinga ukuba akanako ukuzenzela izinto kwaye unenceba nabanye. Uya kucinga ukuba kuya kufuneka uzisole ngokufumana izinto kwaye lo myalezo uyingozi kwikamva lakho kunye nokuzithemba kwakho. Kuya kufuneka ujonge kwisisombululo.
Sukulungisa impazamo yakhe
Awufuni ukulungisa impazamo yabo okanye uya kuba yihelikopta kunye nomzali okhuselekileyo (kunye neziphumo ezibi ezibandakanya oku). Bonisa umntwana wakho indlela yokufumana isisombululo kodwa ungazisombululi izinto ngokwakho.
Mncede abone ngombono
Nceda umntwana wakho ukuba abone izinto ngokwembono, ukuze akwazi ukubona impazamo efanayo kwiindlela ezahlukeneyo. Mxelele, xa enengxaki, beka isitulo esicinga ngenyanga kwaye uhlale kuso. Ke uyakuyibona le ngxaki incinci kakhulu kunokuba ibonakala kuwe.
Khumbula ukuba uthando lwakho alunasiphelo
Umntwana wakho kufuneka azi ukuba uya kuhlala usecaleni kwakhe ukumnika inkxaso ayifunayo nanini na eyifuna. Kuya kufuneka uyazi ukuba ngonxibelelwano oluhle ungasoloko uthetha ngeemvakalelo zakho, iingcinga kunye naziphi na iimpazamo ozenzileyo ukufumana esona sisombululo. Menze aqonde ukuba uthando lwakho alunakulinganiswa, nokuba iimeko zithini na.