Ukuzoba intombazana enomlomo ogqunywe amehlo, uxelele umama wentombazana eneminyaka eli-14 ubudala. Intsingiselo ityhilwe ngumntwana omncinci ngokwakhe: kangangeminyaka emi-3, umhlobo omdala wosapho wamhlukumeza amatyeli aliqela, wayeneminyaka eli-8 ukuya kweli-11 ubudala. Kwenzekile ePamplona, xa umhlaseli wayehlala kwikhaya lale ntombazana, kuba wayengumhlobo wabazali bayo kwaye bayithatha kuba babengenamsebenzi.
Andikwazi nokucinga ukuba woyike kangakanani le ntombazana incinci, ukuba uya kubanjiswa nangoloyiko, ukuziva enetyala kunye nokuziva ephantsi ngokubhekisele kumntu omdala. Ihlala isenzeka: amantombazana kunye namakhwenkwe abayichazi, ngokuyinxenye ngenxa yokuba iinkolelo zentlalo ziyabathintela (bakhula beziva benyanzelekile ukuba bakholise kwaye bahlakulele uloyiko olwahlukeneyo esiludlulisela kubo); kodwa ngenxa yokuba Abaxhaphazi banobuchule ngokungathi ukubenza bagcine le mfihlo yoyikekayo.
Indoda yamdlwengula isebenzisa imizuzu engama-20 apho utata wayethatha khona umama esiya emsebenzini, wamenza gadalala ngokwesondo ngaphandle kokufikelela emzimbeni, kuba ngaphambi kodlwengulo wamnyanzela ukuba abukele iphonografi. Kwaye nangona, besesichazile apha Ukuxhatshazwa kwabantwana ngokwesondo (ASI), ngezantsi ndiza kunika iinkcukacha ngeendlela ezinokuthi zisetyenziswe ngayo. Kodwa kuqala bendifuna ukubonisa ngokufutshane ukuba zeziphi iimpawu ezichaza ii-ASIs:
- Umahluko kumandla (ngokweemvakalelo okanye ngokwasemzimbeni), ngenxa yobume besikhundla somxhaphazi, onokuba sisizalwane, utitshala, ummelwane, okanye umhlobo wabazali (njengoko kwenzekile kwimeko endisandul 'ukuyibalisa.
- Umahluko ekwanelisekeni kweemfuno: iya ngaphandle kokuthetha ukuba kuphela kwesifiso sokwanelisa kwezi meko sesomntu omdala.
- Umahluko wolwazi: obavumela ukuba balawule abantwana, kwaye bakhuthaze "ukugcinwa" kweemfihlo eziyingozi ezinjalo.
Ukuziphatha gwenxa ngokwesondo kunye namantombazana kunye namantombazana.
Ngokwento esiyifundileyo, le ndoda yathatha intombazana encinci yaya nayo kwigumbi ebeligcinelwe yena, yamtshixela kwaye yamnyanzela ukuba abukele iphonografi, ngaphambi kokuba ayidlwengule. Xa, kwiminyaka emi-3 emva kokuba iziganeko ziphelile, umama wayifumanisa, intombazana yavula: "Yonke imihla mama, yonke imihla." Khawufane ucinge ... zininzi iintlungu, ukukhathazeka okukhulu, ubuninzi bezinto, ukufihla kakhulu ...
En eli phepha leRANA Foundation, Sifumanisa ukuba iASI yiyo "Naluphi na uhlobo lokudibana ngokwasemzimbeni kunye okanye ngaphandle kokufikelela ngokwasenyameni, olumiselwe umntwana, ezenziwa ngaphandle kogonyamelo okanye ukoyikisa kwaye ngaphandle kwemvume Inokubandakanya iindlela ezininzi zokuziphatha »:
Ngokunxibelelana ngqo.
- Ukuchukumisa umntwana omncinci kumalungu esini, ukuze ufumane ukonwaba ngokwesondo.
- Umntwana makathinte amalungu esini omntu omdala oxhatshazwayo.
- Ukuphulula okanye ukuphuza iinjongo zesondo, uhlala ufumana ulonwabo, okanye unyanzela umntwana ukuba aphathe.
- Yazisa ngezinto okanye amalungu omzimba (umnwe, incanca…) kwilungu lobufazi, emlonyeni okanye ezimpundu zexhoba.
Akukho nxibelelwano ngqo.
- Fundisa umntwana izinto ezingamanyala.
- Bonisa amalungu akho obuni phambi kwakhe.
- Ukucela umntwana ukuba abelane ngesondo nomnye umntwana.
- Ukulukulela abantwana ngeenjongo zesondo, nakwi-intanethi.
- Thatha imifanekiso yabantu abaxhatshaziweyo kwizikhundla zesondo.
- Ukunyanzela ukubonakaliswa komntu omncinci kwizenzo zesondo (ukubanyanzela ukuba babone ukwabelana ngesondo phakathi kwabantu abadala).
- Qaphela ubuze bentombazana / inkwenkwe ukuze ifumane uyolo.
Khangela ii-ASI ngemizobo.
Apha sanxibelelanisa izikhombisi ezithile kunye nezingacacanga, kwaye ndisebenzisa eli thuba, ndiye ndakhangela ulwazi malunga nentsingiselo yemizobo. Ndiyithanda kakhulu le ncwadi "Imizobo yokuxhatshazwa kwabantwana ngokwesondo"Ngu-María Cecilia López kunye noMaría Beatriz Muller.
Bathi “xa kufunyaniswa isifo se-ASI, Ulandelelwano olupheleleyo lwemizobo olwenziwe ngokuhamba kwexesha luya kuhlala luthathelwa ingqalelo, ngaphandle kokulahleka kwezinye izalathi ezifunyenwe zezinye iindlela ”. Into eqhelekileyo kukugxila ekukhangeleni kwizalathi ezichazayo kunye nomxholo, nangona kufanelekile ukuthathela ingqalelo amagqabantshintshi (kubonakala ngathi ahleliwe) athi umntwana awenze xa ethatha umzobo. Kubalulekile ukuthathela ingqalelo "kungekuphela nje oko umntwana anyanzelayo ukuba akwenze, kodwa (kwaye nangaphezulu kwayo) kwinto azama ukuyiphepha ukuzoba, okanye iinxalenye zomzobo awela kuwo ze uphinde uphinde uphinde uziphindaphinde."
Fundisa ukuzithemba ukuthintela i-ASI.
Ndazisa okokugqibela, umxholo "wokufundisa ukuthembela" njengento yothintelo, kwaye ngenxa yoku, ndibeke ividiyo yeTEDx engezantsi kwesi siqendu, apho uVicky Bernadet (osindileyo we-ASI kunye nomongameli weSiseko enegama lakhe), echaza ukuba singayenza njani: thetha ngeemfihlo nomntwana, amandla kunye uxhobise abancinci, kwaye ubabonelele ngeendawo ezivulekileyo zonxibelelwano.
Ukuthintela, kubalulekile ukwandisa ulwazi loluntu, kwaye ukuza kuthi ga ngoku kufanelekile ukwazi ukuba nangona Azikho iiprofayili ezithile zabaxhaphazi, malunga neepesenti ezingama-80 zamaxhoba axhatshazwe ngabantu kwindawo abahlala kuyo.
Via - Owesithandathu