"Uziphathe kakuhle". Kwiveki ephelileyo kuye kwafuneka mna nosana lwam sohlukane, emva koko ndibuze ukuba unjani kwaye impendulo ithi, "Ulungile." Xa ndisiva elo binzana, ubuso bam bufana necookie yebhanana. "Intoni?". Ngaba umntu angandixelela ukuba yintoni "ukuziphatha kakuhle"? Kuba, mna, ine intsingiselo engenanto kubuzali nakwimfundo.
Yintoni isimilo esihle?
Ngaba ndiza kuthabatha indawo, ukusuka kuluntu endihlala kulo, kunye nolungelelwaniso lwayo lwentlalo nolungelelwaniso, ukuba siziphathe kakuhle kukwenza oko kulindeleke ukuba sikwenze? Ugh, luloyiko. Ayizukuba kukuziphatha kakuhle kukuhlala ekhaya phambi komabonwakude njengemishini, ngaphandle kokucinga, ngaphandle kokucaphuka kakhulu, ngaphandle kokugxeka, ngaphandle kokukhusela amalungelo ethu, ngaphandle kokungxolisa okungekho sikweni.
Kwaye umntwana, yintoni eqhuba kakuhle? Usana luziphatha kakuhle nini? Xa ungazichazi, xa ungalili, xa usitya ukutya ukutya umntu omdala agqiba ukuba kulungile kuye…? Ngaba kukuziphatha kakuhle oko? Umntwana ulandela ithuku lakhe ukuze anelise iimfuno ezithile. Yonke into malunga naye iphambili (kwaye iyamangalisa): Uyakhala kuba eziva elusizi, ephosa into emhlabeni kuba efuna ukwazi ukuba kwenzeka ntoni, uyacaphuka kuba engakufezekisi oko akufunayo, njl. Abantu abadala baxhotyiswe yimfundo yezentlalo apho kunokuba yimfuneko ukubonakalisa, kwaye siqhele ukuphazamisa nokuqhuba iimvakalelo, ukubathulisa ...
Yintoni ukungaziphathi kakuhle?
Ngokwahlukileyo koko, yintoni ukungaziphathi kakuhle? Ngaba uziva unomsindo, usizi, uloyiko ..., ngaba uyalila, uyakhala ...? Ngaba umntwana akaziphathi kakuhle xa ene "tantrum" (Ndiza kubhala enye iposti ngeli gama lincinci), Ukuba awufuni ukwahlulwa kunyoko, ukuba uphosa into, ukuba awuziboni ngathi ulele okanye uyatya ...? Okanye ngaba uhlala uhambelana nesiqu sakho, unyanisekile kwinto oziva ngayo kunye nezinto ozifunayo, ngaphandle kwemeko yokuhlala?
Impazamo kunye nokuzithoba kwidichotomy
Le dichotomy ayilunganga ngokwendalo, okokuqala, ngohlobo lwayo: Ngaba zimbini kuphela iindlela zokwenza okanye iimodeli zokuziphatha? Kwiikholamu ezimbini zinokuhlelwa zonke iintshukumo ezinokwenziwa ngumntu, zonke iimvakalelo zakhe, iimvakalelo ...? Okwesibini, kukuxhomekeka: Yintoni "elungileyo" okanye "embi" kuwe? Kwaye mna? Kwaye kuye?
Umxholo wentetho "uziphathe kakuhle" kwaye "uziphathe kakubi" iyahambelana a Isiko lenkcubeko elibonisa indlela yokuziphatha engqongqo, yakudala kunye neyakudala, ethintela inkululeko yomntu, kwaye apho umthetho ulawula ubukrelekrele bemvakalelo.
Umbutho kunye neenqobo ezisemgangathweni
Kodwa sihlala kuluntu, apho abanye abantu bahlala khona. Ndifuna fundisa Unyana wam uqinisekisa iimvakalelo zakhe, kodwa kananjalo kumaxabiso nakwabanye. Kwaye kulawulwa njani konke oku emva koko? Isindululo sam zezi zilandelayo: inkululeko yokuthetha, unxibelelwano kunye nemida yezokhuseleko.
1. Inkululeko yokuthetha
Iimvakalelo zaseprayimari zinomsebenzi: ukusishukumisela kwisenzo. Iintsana zenza kwaye zisabele ngokweemvakalelo zazo, kunye neminqweno yazo, kwimfuno yokwanelisa iimfuno. Oko kukuthi, ukuba andifuni ukohlukaniswa noMama, ndiyalila; ukuba andilambanga, andityi; Ukuba andikwazi ukwenza le nto ndiyifunayo kwaye ndikhathazekile, ndiziphosa emhlabeni ndikhabe kakhulu.
Awuva buhlungu xa kufuneka wohlukene nomntu omthandayo? Okanye ngaba awuva buhlungu ngenxa yokungabikho kobulungisa, xa amalungelo ethu ephulwa? Ngaba uziva ukhululekile xa uveza iimvakalelo zakho ngokukhululekileyo?
2. NoNxibelelwano
Caba ndiye ndadikwa lusana lwam amaxesha aliwaka kuba ndiyathetha naye kwaye ndiyathetha naye, ndicacisa yonke into eyenzekayo kwaye iyintoni intsingiselo yayo. Sobabini sinxibelelana ngokugqibeleleyo nezixhobo esinazo. Ukufundisa nokukhulisa ngelizwi lelona libalaseleyo; Unxibelelwano, ingxoxo, ihlala sisiqalo esihle kunye nezixhobo ezigqwesileyo zokusombulula ungquzulwano
3. Ixabiso nemilinganiselo yokhuseleko
Imida? Nangona ndibhale "inkululeko" apha ngasentla, ndicinga ukuba kukho inani imida, imigaqo okanye imigaqo oomama nootata inoxanduva lokumisela; Yiyo leyo inento yokwenza nokhuselo lwakho kunye nokhuseleko lwabanye. Oko kukuthi, usana alunakuchukumisa iplagi yokhuseleko okanye ukuphosa isanti emehlweni omnye umntwana kuba abafuni ukukubolekisa ngento yabo yokudlala ukuze bakhusele le yokugqibela. Icacile kwaye ilula.
Ke ngoku? Ngaba unesibindi sokugxotha la magama kwisigama sakho kwaye uwatshintshe abe ngamabinzana afanelekileyo neentsana zakho kwaye azele ngumxholo kunye neemvakalelo?