Into yokuba ulutsha luyatshintsha kwaye aluguquki ayonto intsha. Amahomoni abo kunye nembono yabo egocentric kwihlabathi zihlala zibangela ukuba ubudlelwane babo nabazali babo buphawulwe ngamanye amaxesha ngonxibelelwano olubi okanye ukuqonda okungalunganga. Ulutsha lunokuba nomsindo ofanayo nolweminyaka emibini ubudala, kodwa lisiwe kwinqanaba eliphezulu: kunzima kakhulu ukulawula.
Ulutsha luba nemisindo engalindelekanga yomsindo. Le yinxalenye yokuba kwishumi elivisayo kwaye ingqondo yakho iqhutywa ziimvakalelo. Incoko enenjongo entle evela kumzali inokukhokelela kwiingcinga nakwindlela yokuziphatha engalindelekanga kulutsha ... Ingakhokelela ekwehleni ukuya enzonzobileni yeemvakalelo ezingalawulekiyo, ukubetha iingcango, okanye iinyembezi eziza kuphazamisa nawuphi na umzali.
Zeziphi izinto ezinokubangela ulutsha
Njengomzali kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba ungalibali umbono wokuba kutheni ulutsha lukhawuleze ukucaphuka, Oko kukuthi, zeziphi izinto ezinokubangela umsindo wakho ngaphandle kokuba uqaphele. Ngale nto, asithethi ukuba kufuneka uzithintele zonke ezi zinto ukunqanda ukuba babenomsindo, kude lee ... sebenza nomntwana wakho okwishumi elivisayo iimvakalelo.
Kubalulekile ukuba abakwishumi elivisayo bazive beqondwa kwaye beviwa ngalo lonke ixesha ukuphucula unxibelelwano phakathi kwabazali nabantwana. Ukuphulukana nokuphola kwakho ayisosidlo sinambitha, kodwa bafuna ukuqonda kwakho kunye nesikhokelo kunye nesikhokelo sakho sokufunda ukuphatha iimvakalelo 'eziphambili' zibonakala ngathi azilawuleki kwaphela.
Xa besiva ukuba awubaqondi
'Akukho mntu undiqondayo', isenokuba lelinye lawona mabinzana owevayo kakhulu kunyana / kwintombi yakho ekwishumi elivisayo. Ngokucacileyo akufuneki ibeyinto yokwenene… Kodwa ulutsha luyakhathazeka xa luziva ngathi abazali balo abaluqondi. Imvakalelo yokungaqondani inokubenza bazive becaphuke kakhulu.
Banokuba nomsindo xa besiva ukuba abazali babo abayiqondi into eqhubekayo ebomini babo. Bacinga ukuba abazali babo baya kubasola kuphela ngokwenzekayo kwaye ke, bazive bengaqondwa ngakumbi.
Xa bekhathalele ngawe
Yikholwe okanye ungakholelwa, ulutsha luyakucaphukisa xa lukhathazekile ngawe. Kubonakala ngathi kuyadlala kodwa akunjalo. Okwangoku abayazi indlela yokuchaza zonke iimvakalelo zabo, ke abayazi indlela yokubonisa inkxalabo yabo ngawe kwaye ngokungagqibekanga, umsindo uyakuvela ...
Xa baziva behlazekile
Oku akumangalisi kuba kwenzeka nakubantu abadala ngamanye amaxesha, akunjalo? Xa umntu ofikisayo eneentloni okanye eneentloni ngayo nayiphi na into, uyakucaphuka. Abakwishumi elivisayo baneentloni xa abazali babo bezama ukwenza njengomntu ofikisayo, bafuna ukunxiba njengabo, okanye ukusebenzisa ulwimi lolutsha. Abazali akufuneki babe ngabahlobo nabantwana babo abafikisayo, ayilunganga ukukhula kwabo kwaye ke, nokuba abayazi indlela yokukucacisela yona, basenokuziva benomsindo ngawe.
Xa bezithoba
Unokumangaliswa yile, kodwa ulutsha luyakwazi ukuba nomsindo ngokwalo xa ludanile ngento abayenzileyo okanye abayenzileyo. Baziva benomsindo kwaye umsindo ongaqondakaliyo ungagxila kuwe, kuba ungoyena mntu bamthandayo emhlabeni. Abafuni ukuphoxeka Yiyo loo nto kubalulekile ukuba ubafundise ukuba iimpazamo ziyinxalenye yokufunda, kunye nobomi.
Xa kuthelekiswa nabantakwabo
Abakwishumi elivisayo bakuthiyile ukuthelekiswa nabantakwabo ... Phantse kwafana xa bekuthelekisa nomnye umntu. Zama ukuba ungaze uthelekise abantwana bakho, bahlukile, ke baxabise ukuba ngoobani ngokwahlukeneyo.
Xa uthetha ngabahlobo bakho ngendlela ethoba isidima
Ukuthetha ngabahlobo babantwana bakho abakwishumi elivisayo kunokuba yindawo yokugcotywa kwam ... Kakhulu ukuba uyenza ngendlela engeyiyo. Abantwana bakho baya kuba nomsindo kakhulu xa ugxeka izihlobo zabo. Abafikisayo bachonga ngokuthe ngqo kubahlobo babo kwaye ukuba uthetha into engalunganga bayitolika ngokuthe ngqo ngokungathi kukugxeka ngokuthe ngqo kubo.
Xa bengamelani kakuhle neengxaki
Nokuba abantwana bakho babonakala bekhulile kakhulu, ungaze (kwaye ndiyaphinda: ungaze) ubasebenzise njengezifihlakeleyo kwiimvakalelo zakho okanye iimvakalelo zakho. Ulutsha alukulungelanga ukukunceda ukusombulula iingxaki zakho. Khumbula ukuba bangabantwana kwaye kusenendlela ende ekusafuneka beyihambile ukuze babe ngabantu abaqolileyo kwaye nokuba sele bekhulile: uya kuhlala ungutata okanye umama wabo, ke ngoko, ireferensi yakho ephezulu kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi.
Xa beziva belusizi okanye bedandathekile
Kulutsha oluninzi, luziva lusizi okanye ukuxinezeleka Akunyanzelekanga ukuba ifane nokuba phantsi ... Kodwa ukuqala ukubonisa umsindo kunye nokuziphatha komsindo. Olunye ulutsha olunemvakalelo yoxinzelelo alwazi ukuba lwenze njani xa lusizi. Ukuba uyabona ukuba umntwana wakho unomsindo iintsuku ezininzi kakhulu zilandelelana kwaye ayisiyotshintsho nje kwindlela aziphethe ngayo, ke… Kuyakufuneka kuvavanywe ukuba loluphi na uncedo afuna ukulufumana.
Xa zingaqwalaselwa
Kubalulekile ukuba abazali bangabizi ootitshala babo, abaqeqeshi, njl. Ngaphandle kokuba bathethile nabantwana babo kuqala malunga nokuba bayintoni na. Ulutsha lunokuba nomsindo kuba lungafuni ukuba uphazamisane nobomi balo ngaphandle kokuba oko kunyanzelekile… Bafuna ukubonisa ubunikazi babo kunye nezakhono zabo zokusombulula ungquzulwano (nangona bafuna isikhokelo sakho ngaxeshanye).
Ukongeza kuyo yonke le nto, abakwishumi elivisayo banokuziva benomsindo ngenxa yezinye izizathu ezinje ngokungaziphathi kakuhle kwabazali babo, ukuhleba, kuba xa abazali babo besasaza iimfihlo zabo bethetha nezihlobo ezithembekileyo, xa abazali babo bengakwazi ukuqonda ulwimi olungathethi ngomlomo ... Zininzi izizathu kwaye kuyakuxhomekeka kwishumi elivisayo elinomsindo malunga nenye into okanye enye. Zeziphi izizathu ezenza ukuba umntwana wakho afikise equmbe ngakumbi Bafuna isikhokelo sakho sokuqonda ngokweemvakalelo.
Molo, intombi yam ayithethi nam ngenxa yengxoxo ebiqhubeka phakathi kwesithandwa sam nabazali bam, uyimamele ineminyaka eli-14 ubudala kwaye ikwisigaba esintsokothileyo, ndaphinda ndamxelela ukuba ukhulelwe inye into wayeka nokuthetha nam ngelishwa ndilahlekile kwaye emva kwethutyana waphinda wathetha nam, kuzofuneka ndimnike ixesha lokuba andixolele okanye ndenzeni ???