Thina bantu badala sixelela ngendlela ye-anecdote loo mbuzo ukuba unyana okanye intombi yethu ibuze kuthi kwaye yasenza saziva singonwabanga. Kodwa kunqabile ukuba sikuthathele ingqalelo oko Siphosa imibuzo engathandekiyo ebantwaneni, Kwaye le micimbi inokubenza bazive bengalunganga.
Ngamanye amaxesha ukunxibelelana nabantwana akukho lula. Amaxesha amaninzi baphendula ngo-ewe okanye ngo-hayi, kwaye ukuba andazi, kungenxa yokuba abazi nyani. Kodwa thina bantu badala silindele ukuba bachaze yonke into, bayilawule, bacacelwe zizinto, kwaye silibale ukuba ngabantwana. Sikunika imikhondo yokwazi ukuba yeyiphi imibuzo abantwana abanokuyifumana ingonwabanga kunye nendlela yokulawula iimvakalelo zokuziva ungaqhelekanga ngombuzo.
Imibuzo engathandekiyo malunga nokuziphatha kwakho
Sonke sikhe sayiphosa loo nto: Yiza, uthi molo, ncamisa ku… Abantwana bakufumanisa kunzima ukuzithemba nabantu abangasondelelananga nabo. Thina bantu badala sifunda ukubulisa ngembeko, kodwa abanalo olu lwazi lwangaphakathi. Inkqubo ye- Ukubulisa okuvela kwinkwenkwe okanye kwintombazana kubaluleke kakhulu kwaye kunyanisekile. Akufunekanga sinyanzele abantwana bethu ukuba babulise, kungasathethwa ke ngokubabuza ukuba kutheni ungabulisi? Kwimpendulo yakho, sinokuzifumana sikwimeko engathandekiyo.
Kukho abantwana kubani Ukuqhagamshelana nomzimba kubiza. Abakuthandi ukuphathwa, ukwangana, banokuziva beneentloni zokubulisa. Yiyo loo nto kungcono ukuba ubacacisele ukuba ngubani lo mntu mdala, okanye umntwana esifuna ukuba babulise, kwaye athathe isigqibo sokubulisa okanye hayi.
Usenokuba uqaphele ukuba abantwana bakho abonwabanga xa fumana ukwanga kuxhomekeke ekubeni ngabaphi abantu, ukuba uyabona ukuba ubeke ubuso bakhe, musa ukumcela ukuba amange. Musa ukumenza abe buhlungu, Ukuthandana kubonakala ngezinye iindlela ngaphandle kokumanga. Umntwana wakho unokuthatha isigqibo sokukuxhawula, ukuhlala ethangeni lakho, okanye ukubukela nje. Ungaze ucinge ngokumbuza ukuba ndiyamthanda na umntu lowo okanye andimthandi kwaye ukuba ufuna ukumcela ukuba amange. Kubantwana, ukwanga kubandakanya ukuthatha inyathelo elibaluleke kakhulu, ke sukunyanzela.
Kwaye sele unaye umntu othandana naye?
Kuqhelekile ebantwaneni, ngakumbi ekuqaleni kwenkulisa, ukuthatha iindima ezithile njengabantu abadala. Kuhlala kukho ifayile ye umhlobo ononxibelelwano olukhethekileyo. Kwaye phantse kusoloko kukho umntu omdala osemsebenzini othetha loo nto malunga. Bandixelele ukuba unesoka, intombi. Kwaye kuhlala umntu ongazithembiyo nomntwana.
Cinga ukuba ubuya kuvakalelwa njani xa ubuzwa, nokuba umntwana uziva njani. Khumbula ukuba abantwana abaziqondi i-irony kangako, okanye umntu ohlekisayo. Kubo kwaye phantse bahlala bethetha ishishini.
Kananjalo ukuba ucinga ngayo ngumbuzo ongenantsingiseloNgaphandle kokungonwabi. Andinampendulo. Amakhwenkwe namantombazana afuna ukudlala, simisela olu hlobo lobudlelwane ukusuka ebudaleni. Kwaye bayasungula imidlalo kwaye bathiya amagama abo badlala nabo kwezi ndima, kodwa ukusuka apho ukuya kuthi xa sibabuza ngazo, kuhamba indlela ende.
Ufuna ukuba yintoni xa sele ukhulile?
Omnye wemibuzo engathandekiyo esiye siyibuze ngaphandle kokucinga yile yokuba ufuna ukuba yintoni xa ukhulile? Njengokuba amakhwenkwe namantombazana ekhula bakha impendulo kuloo nto, kuba sele besazi ukuba kungekudala okanye kamva baya kubuza. Kodwa abayikhathalelanga, abayicingi kwaye abayazi ukuba kuthetha ntoni ukuba mdala okanye ukuba nomsebenzi.
Ngapha koko, thina bantu badala asibabuzi nje ukuba bafuna ukuba yintoni? Ngaphandle koko kutheni, kwaye ke kuya kufuneka ufunde kakhulu? Okanye siphoxekile kwiimpendulo zakho. Ngayo yonke le mibuzo mitsha ingathandekiyo, umntwana uya kuziva ngathi basilele.
Masibe nobubele kuthi, kunokwenzeka ukuba sibuze oonyana bethu neentombi imibuzo engathandekiyo, kwaye baya kuziva kakubi ngayo. Ukuthintela oku masingabaphathi njengabantu abadala kwaye masihle siye kwinqanaba labo lobukrelekrele.