Lo bekungeke kube ngumbuzo kuphela okufanele sizibuze wona, kepha kufanele sihlanganise iminyaka abakulungele ngayo ukushiywa ngaphandle kokugadwa ngabantu abadala. the I-BBC ibike kuleli sonto ngabazali ababeboshwe ngo-2014 nango-2015 eWales naseNgilandi, ngoba iziphathimandla zase zithole izingane zabo ekhaya zodwa, futhi zanganakwa. Ngicabanga ukuthi ukungenelela kwenzeka ngoba kwenzeka ingozi kumntwana, noma kunesidingo esithile; noma mhlawumbe ngoba bayizingane ezincane kakhulu, futhi abantu abadala abavela ngaphandle komndeni (omakhelwane, abangane ...) bafinyelela esiphethweni sokuthi akufanelekile ukuhlala ngaphandle kwabazali babo ekhaya.
Kimina kubalulekile ukuthi sigxile kulokhu "ukunganakwa" (okufanele noma okungokoqobo, kuya ngeminyaka yabancane), kepha futhi nangobudala, okuthi uma buphansi kakhulu, buzosiholela ngqo kowokuqala. Ngisho ngalokhu, lokho Iminyaka engu-7 ayifani neminyaka eyi-12; ngaphandle kokuziba ukuthi kuzoba nentsha eneminyaka engu-13 ekwaziyo ukuzinakekela isikhashana, kepha ingakwazi - nayo - ukunakekela izingane zakwabo. Angifuni ukukubandakanya kakhulu, ngakho-ke ngizogxila kwezinye izici zemithetho yaseSpain, futhi iseluleko i-NSPCC yaseBrithani, unikeza ngakho.
I-NSPCC yinhlangano ezinikele ekuvikeleni isihluku ezinganeni, okususelwa kuso lokho "Bonke abantwana kufanele bakulwele". Njengakwamanye amazwe aseYurophu, i-United Kingdom ayinayo imithethonqubo ecacile neqondile ngokuthi izingane zingashiywa zodwa noma cha; kodwa kuthathwa njengobudedengu (ukweqiwa, noma ukunganaki ngokungazihlanganisi) njengejeziso; ngakho-ke, kunoma yisiphi isimo kuzoncika kakhulu ekulinganisweni, noma ekutheni imithetho ekhona isetshenziswa kanjani. Usoseshini weluleka bonke omama nobaba ungashiyi izingane noma izingane ezincane zodwa, hhayi nokuthi "uye phansi umzuzwana ngesinkwa"
Izinto eziningi zingenzeka ngemizuzu eyi-10: ukusha lapho ushaya i-toast isinkwa, ukuwa kusuka ekuphakameni okukhulu noma okuncane kakhulu ukuminyanisa emzimbeni wangaphandle, kanti ubhuti omncane akazi enze njani. Futhi akufanele bashiywe bodwa ngisho noma belele, ake ucabange umzuzwana wokuvuka futhi ubone ukuthi umama noma ubaba abekho, nakanjani kubakhathaza kakhulu: umbono wabo wesikhathi uhluke kakhulu kowethu, futhi imizuzu embalwa ingabonakala njengehora.
Futhi eSpain, izingane zingasala zodwa emakhaya?
Okokuqala, izincomo zokusebenzisa ukuqonda zisebenza kunoma yimuphi umongo, kepha futhi ...
I-Civil Code yethu ibalula esihlokweni ukuthi “Isimo sokungabi nalusizo sithathwa njengaleso esenzeka empeleni ngenxa yokungathobeli umthetho, noma ukusetshenziswa okungenakwenzeka noma okunganele kwemisebenzi yokuvikela esungulwe yimithetho yokunakekelwa kwabancane, lapho ancishwa usizo oludingekayo lokuziphatha noma lwezinto ezibonakalayo. ”Ngakho-ke, lapho bebhekene nokungabi namandla okuzisiza, abazali bangabhekana nokujeziswa, futhi esimweni esibi kakhulu ukulahlekelwa ukugadwa.
Umhlahlandlela ongcono kakhulu wokuthatha isinqumo ukuphendukela kwimininingwane evumayo, futhi uyihlole ngokususelwa ekukhuleni kwengane (okubandakanya ikhono labo lokuphendula noma lokuzibophezela), kanye nokwethemba esinakho (noma esikwazi ukuba nakho enganeni yethu). Futhi uma ngikhuluma ngemininingwane evumayo, ngingabhekisa eminyakeni lapho ochwepheshe abaningi be-psychology, wezifo zezingane, ... bekhombisa njengobuncane ukuze inzalo ikwazi ukuhlala yodwa ekhaya. Kuphakathi kweminyaka eyi-9 nengu-12 ubudala, kepha kuxhumene, njengoba ngishilo, nezinye izinto (isibopho, ukuvuthwa, ikhono lokuzimisela, ... mhlawumbe kunezinto eziningi kakhulu ongazicela enganeni, noma cha?).
Futhi-ke, ngicabanga ngaso sonke isikhathi ngokungabikho okufishane, ngoba kunjalo ... ukushiya ingane engaphansi kuka-11 kuphela phakathi nosuku lokusebenza lwabazali bakho, Ngikuthola kungafanele ngokuphelele, futhi ngazi izindlu ezingaphezu kweyodwa lapho kwenzeka khona.
Ngakho-ke ngingawashiya amadodakazi namadodana ami ekhaya ngedwa ngenkathi ngiya ezitolo?
Futhi ubani othi ukuthengwa, kusho ukwenza abaphathi, kodwa engingakwazi ukukwamukela ukuthi indodana / indodakazi ivunyelwe ukuchitha ihora noma ngaphezulu ngaphandle kokuba khona komuntu omdala, ngoba abazali bafuna ukuphuza ikhofi, noma bayophuza.
Unayo impendulo
Ingane yedwa (mdala ngokwanele) ekhaya okwaziyo ukuvikela izingoziAkusona isimo sokungabi namandla okuzisiza, kepha zihlupha ngokuhlela, ukuhlela, nokuqondisa leyo ntombazane noma lowo mfana ozohlala ngaphandle kwabantu abadala isikhashana. Uma kunesidingo, yenza ukuhlolwa kwangaphambili.
Futhi, cabanga ngalokhu okulandelayo:
- Ngabe ukhulumile nezingane mayelana "babezokwenzenjani uma" (ukube bashiye umpompi usebenza kuze kuphele amanzi kusinki, uma othile abangamazi ashaye ucingo, njll.)? Ukucabanga "njengokungathi" kungumsebenzi wezemfundo osiza kakhulu ukucabanga kokungabonakali.
- Ingabe umfana noma intombazane banomthwalo wemfanelo?
- Ngabe uyakwazi ukulungisa isidlo esilula?
- Ingabe ukhululekile ukucabanga ngokuba wedwa?
- Unayo indlu ephephile?
Isikhundla se-NSPCC
- Hhayi ukuhamba angalokothi abe ingane noma ingane encane eyedwa ekhaya
- Ungazishiyi izingane ezingaphansi kweminyaka eyi-12 isikhathi eside ekhaya kungekho muntu omdala.
- Cabanga ngaso sonke isikhathi izidingo ezithile zengane ezishiywe ukunakekelwa ingane yakini endala (imithi, ukungabekezelelani, ...).
- Ake ucabange ukuthi ingane eneminyaka engu-4 ubudala ihlala nomfowabo oneminyaka engu-15, ingabe uyethemba ukuthi endala ngeke imlahle futhi izobe ibhekile?
- Setha imithetho ecacile, isibonelo: lapho bebona lokho kufona kukamama noma ubaba, njalo thatha ifoni, ungavuli into ethile yokusebenza, ungaphumi, izinombolo ongazishayela uma kunesimo esiphuthumayo.
- Batshele isikhathi ozobuya ngaso, futhi ugcine isithembiso sakho.
- Mfonele ngezikhathi ezithile uma uchitha isikhathi esingaphezu kwehora ungekho ekhaya.
- Ngeminyaka engaphansi kwengu-16, kungcono ukungabi wedwa ebusuku.
Uma sikhuluma ngokuphepha kwezingane, sihlala sicacisa ukuthi ukuvimbela kuyadingeka ukugwema izingozi; futhi lesi sihloko asihlukile kakhulu
Ekugcineni, ngicabanga ukuthi ezikhathini eziningi imindeni "ayinakho ukukhetha" ngoba ukubuyisana komndeni nomsebenzi akusikho, Vele, ukwenza izinto ngokungalungile nokubeka izingane ezingafuni noma ezingazi ukuthi zizoba zodwa engcupheniKufanelekile ukusebenzisa amalungu omndeni, izinsizakalo zangaphandle, abangani abathembekile, njll., Okungenani ngenkathi besebancane.
Izithombe - (Okwesibili kuye kwesine ngokulandelana) UMorten Liebach, yoshimov, UPhilippe Put
Yeka inkinga enameva Macarena. Izindaba zabazali abashiya izingane zabo zodwa bayofuna iziphuzo zenza izinwele zami zime ... Kuyiqiniso futhi ukuthi kunezikhathi lapho ubashiya khona imizuzu emi-5 lapho benesibopho futhi ungenakukukhetha kepha kungenzeka ungabi yinkinga ...
Sawubona Nati, ngiyabonga ngokuphawula kwakho, kungisizile ukwethula okuncane, ngicabanga ngalezo 'zingozi' zokuziphatha, ezishiya izingane zodwa ukuthi zikwazi ukuzijabulisa. Ngiyakholelwa futhi ukuthi lokhu kungathathwa njengobudedengu.
Ukubingelela
Sawubona, bengizodinga impendulo, angikaphumi noma ngihlobene nanoma ngubani iminyaka engu-7, ngilashwa nge-escitalopran, ngingedwa nginakekela indodakazi yami eneminyaka engu-7 (anginawo umndeni noma izindlela zezimali zabagcini bezingane ), ubaba umbona uma kumfanele noma emkhumbula, futhi unehlazo elincane ukusho ukuthi yiphutha lami ??????. Ngiyakuqonda okuvela kulesi sihloko, ukuthi angikwazi ukushiya indodakazi yami yodwa ilele cishe i-5 amahora, ngoba ngincike ebusini ukubuya (i-ex yami ingishiyile ngingenayo nemoto). Ngiqonde ukuthi, ngiyaqonda ukuthi ngizoba mubi, ngibi ngokuhamba namaqembu obaba, omama abangabodwa njengami, kanye ex angenza impilo yakhe, akunjalo?
Sawubona Isabel María: akufanele sinikeze izimpendulo ngokungabaza okuthile, lokho akuwona umsebenzi webhulogi, kodwa siyethemba ukuthi ukufunda okuqukethwe bekukwakhele.
Abekho yini omama noma obaba ofunda nabo indodakazi yakho ukuhlangana nabo ukuze baxoxe? Ngabe insizakalo yezempilo ayinikezeli ngemithi yokwelapha iqembu ukuxhasa le mithi?
Ukuba ngumzali kukodwa kunzima kakhulu, ngikuqonda kahle, noma kunjalo, manje bengingeke ngigxile ekutheni ubaba angayakha kabusha impilo yakhe noma cha, kodwa "ekwakheni kabusha" okwakho, nokuthi lokho kulungisa akusho ukuthi uyophuma uzijabulise, kodwa ukwenza ngcono ukwazi ukunakekela intombazane. Ngaphezu kwalokho, umzuzu wokuphumula ungatholakala ngezindlela eziningi.
Ngakho-ke maduzane amahora ama-5 eyedwa (nokulala) kubukeka njengokuphakade ngeminyaka yakhe, kepha kungenxa yesimiso sakho somsebenzi? Abekho yini omakhelwane abathembekile abangakusiza? Awukwazi ukukhuluma nosonhlalakahle?
Angazi, angisazi ngokuningiliziwe isimo sakho, futhi ngiyaphinda ngiyasho ukuthi akuyona indawo yokuxazulula amacala ngamanye ...
Ngiyethemba yonke into isixazululiwe.
Indwangu engaka !!! Futhi ngaphezulu buza!
Nginombuzo nginendodana ecishe ibe neminyaka eyi-17 ubudala futhi ayifuni ukuphuma ishaywe umoya nathi, noma iphume nabangani bethu, ithi angiyishiye yodwa ekhaya kodwa ngiyayitshela ukuthi kufanele abe neminyaka eyi-18. Ngabe kunjalo noma angahlala amahora ambalwa kuphela.
Sawubona Mildred, usibhalela uvela kuliphi izwe? Ngeminyaka eyi-17 umuntu angahlala ekhaya yedwa, hhayi ebusuku, hhayi amahora amaningi, kepha bangahlala.
Vele, kuzohlala kungcono njalo uma kukhona umuntu omdala endlini, ngoba angadinga okuthile, kepha konke kuzoncika nesikhathi sosuku esikhuluma ngalo ...
Manje, angazi noma endaweni ohlala kuyo kukhona noma yimuphi umthetho ophikisana nalokhu engikutshela khona. Ngikufisela okuhle.
Ngihlala emadrid.
Sawubona futhi Mildred, ngincoma ukuthi uphinde ufunde okuthunyelwe, bese uthatha isinqumo. Ungacela neminye imindeni, ukuthi ihlale izolile…. Ngikufisela okuhle.
Angicabangi ukuthi kuvikela ngokweqile, ngicabanga ukuthi kunengqondo: izingane akufanele zishiywe zodwa ekhaya. Uma umuntu omdala kumele enze inqubo eduze kwasekhaya (athenge umuthi, athenge okuncane,…) kufanele kuthathe isikhathi esincane ngangokunokwenzeka futhi aphathe umakhalekhukhwini ukuze izingane zikwazi ukumshayela uma kwenzeka okuthile. Usabazi ubungozi obuthathayo; ukuthi kwenzeka ingozi nokuthi izingane zinjalo azazi ukuthi kufanele zisabele kanjani. Lapha umthetho ucacile futhi ufushane (izindatshana 229, 230 no-231 zePenal Code) futhi kuzothathwa njengokulahlwa nayo yonke imiphumela yezomthetho uma kuba nesikhalazo.
Ukuvikela ngokweqile? Angicaciswanga ngakho. Izimpikiswano zokuthi ngaphambi kwezingane zesizukulwane sethu sishiywe sodwa umzuzwana azisebenzi. Siphinde sahamba singenawo amabhande ezimotweni futhi akukho okwenzekile kithina esingatholakalanga engozini, kepha lokho akubunciphisanga ubungozi. Futhi asizikhumbuli izingozi zasekhaya ezenzekile nemiphumela yokungabi namuntu omdala onakekela abancane kulezi zimo.
Ngikhetha ikakhulukazi ukungashiyi izingane zami zodwa futhi uma kufanele ngihambe ngisebenzise "omakhelwane" ukungisiza.
Sawubona Sadro, ngivumelana nawe, njalo kuye ngeminyaka yezingane esikhuluma ngazo (iminyaka eyi-6 ayifani ne-16). Uma ukhuluma ngokuvikelwa ngokweqile akucaci kimi ukuthi ngikushilo yini eposini, noma ini. Ngiyakholelwa futhi ukuthi ukuvikelwa ngokweqile kungenye into, nokungabagadi ukuze bangabi nengozi.
Ngiyabonga kakhulu ngokuphawula. Ngikufisela okuhle.
Sawubona, igama lami nginguSusana. Ngingumama wezingane ezimbili, oneminyaka engu-15 no-18. Ukugcinwa kwengane eneminyaka engu-15 okwamanje kubanjwe ngubaba futhi uthathe isinqumo ngaphandle kwemvume yami ukushiya ikhaya lakhe yedwa isonto ngoba akafuni ukuya endaweni yeholide. Banobudlelwano obubi nendodana yami, kodwa ngenze konke okusemandleni ukuthi iye endlini kayise nodadewabo. Esontweni lonke ekupheleni ubehlala yedwa izinsuku ezimbili nobusuku obubili kuphela. Ukusho lokho ngithwala izandla ekhanda lapho ngithola ukuthi yingakho ngenze konke okusemandleni ami ukwenza ingane yami eneminyaka engu-18 naye. Ngabe kuyicala yini ukushiya intombazane eneminyaka eyi-15 ekhaya yodwa isonto elilodwa ???