Abazali abaningi abakwazi ukubuyisana lapho izingane zabo ziqala ukubhekana nesimo sokuzithiba kubazali bazo. Kusukela eminyakeni eyisithupha yilapho ezinye izingane lapho qala ukugcina isimo sokungacabangeliBanamanga, banamawala futhi banethalente lokuphindisela. Sibhekene nalesi simo kumele sazi ukuthi wenzeni ngezingane ezinobushiqela.
Ayikho indlela engcono ukwedlula ukufundisa ngalo lonke uthando lwethu, ngaphandle kokukhohlwa ukungaguquguquki kwethu negunya. Uma sivumela izimpawu zobushiqela ukuthi zizinikeze lapho zincane, njengoba iminyaka ikhula kunzima kakhulu ukulawula. Umfana noma intombazane eneminyaka eyi-15 isivele inzima kakhulu ukuphatha ngenxa yokuhlubuka kwabo kanye nesimo sabo esiyinkimbinkimbi ukusiphatha.
Yini ingane enobushiqela?
Izingane zigcina ziphoqelela igunya lazo nokubusa ukuziphatha kwabo phambi kwabazali babo. Bayakwazi ukubaleka ngokukhohlisa okuncane nokuthi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kungadala isimilo esibi. Indlela abaphatha ngayo ukudala ukubusa kwabazali ibizwa 'i-emperor syndrome'.
Izingxoxo ziyaqhubeka, kukhona ukukhala nentukuthelo enkulu. Bayakwazi ukulimaza abazali babo kakhulu ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo futhi ababekezeleli ukuziphatha kwabo. Bayakhohlisa futhi banenkani impela, Bayazwelana nemizwa yabantu ababazungezile, ngakho-ke ayibumbeki kalula.
Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, lezi zingane ziba nolaka kakhulu njengoba abafana abathandwayo bayadalwa, babona impilo ngendlela yokuzicabangela hhayi kuphela nomndeni, kepha nobudlelwano babo. Ziza ukuthuthuka ukubekezelelana okuphansi kokukhungathekaUma okuthile kungahambi kahle noma bengafinyeleli emgomweni, bayathukuthela futhi babe nodlame.
Bangaba yintsha eye zingasilawuli ngendlela efanele isimo sazo esingokomzwelo, engazi ukuthi uzokhuluma kanjani. Ngeke bazehlise emithethweni efakwe kubo futhi bazohlala beziphatha bona njalo nokuzethemba okuphansi.
Singaziphatha kanjani izingane ezinobushiqela?
Kubalulekile ukuhlaziya uhlelo lwezemfundo olufundiswayo, uma kukhona okudinga ukuguqulwa kulokhu, kufanele bobabili abazali bayavuma ukusebenzisa imodeli efanayo yezemfundo. Awudingi ukubheka abanecala futhi kufanele uqale dala inqubo enhle, lapho ingane kufanele ilalele khona ngaphandle kokungabaza. Ngesikhathi kwenziwa ushintsho futhi kwenziwa nemithetho, kufanele ilandelwe ngangokunokwenzeka, ngaphandle kokukhothama noma ukuhoxa.
Impela kunezingxoxo eziningi lapho ingane ingafuni ukuthobela umthetho othile. Kubalulekile yehlisa umoya ungafiki. Uma ingane imemeza noma ihlambalaza, ungayinaki futhi ungabuyisi izinkulumo ezifanayo. Izinsongo azilungile nazo, njengoba zidlulisela ukungazethembi enganeni futhi zidala ukuphika okuningi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.
Kufanele uyiyeke ingane yehlisa umoya futhi intukuthelo iyaphela. Ngaphandle kokushiya indaba eceleni, kufanele usondele ngothando futhi menze ahlaziye isimo. Akudingekile ukudala impikiswano enkulu ngoba ayijwayele amagama, kepha yebo kukukhumbuza ngemithetho ebekiwe nokuthi kufanele ubahloniphe.
Ngokuxoxisana okuzolile Ungazisiza kakhulu izingane zakho, kungcono kakhulu kunokuphikisana nokuxoxisana. Kumele ake ngihlaziye isimo, kuwumqondo omuhle ukumenza azindle ukuthi imiphi imiphumela nokuthi hlobo luni lwemiphumela yokuziphatha kwakhe okungaholela kuyo.
Futhi akufanele ishiywe yodwa, ukuvumela izinkinga zabo zixazululwe yingane uqobo, kufanele baqaphele ukusekelwa kwethu okugcwele. Ukujeziswa okuqhubekayo, intukuthelo enkulu nokuthukuthela ngaso sonke isikhathi kwenza ingane izule uzizwe ucindezelwa kakhulu.
Kumele sisithule lesi simo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi nangokubekezela okuningi. Ukufingqa, uma ingane isivele iqala ukukhombisa izimpawu zokuziphatha kobushiqela, iseluleko esihle kunazo zonke beka imikhawulo njengoba incane, futhi okuningi, inqubo ejwayelekile.