Ingabe uke wachitha amahora amaningi kunalawo okufanele uhlehlise into ongayithandi ukuyenza? Kwenzeke kithi sonke. Iqiniso liwukuthi ukungabi nesisusa Kuyinkinga esithinta sonke, kodwa ngokuvamile kunzima kakhulu ukuyelapha ezinganeni.
Inkinga ukuthi ukungabi nogqozi ezinganeni kuba kubi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi futhi ungawalandela aze afike ebudaleni.
Kuthiwa isisusa kumelwe sisuke enhliziyweni futhi iningi imizamo yokukhuthaza izingane iyazehlisa. Nakuba lokhu kwakamuva kuyiqiniso, okokuqala kuye kwafakazelwa ukuthi kunephutha ezikhathini eziningi. Abacwaningi nochwepheshe bezengqondo bayathanda UCarol Dweck baye babonisa ukuthi ukusetshenziswa kwamagama athile kanye nokwamukela imikhuba ethile kungasiza ingane engenamdlandla.
Uma uzithola ukulesi simo, ngokuqinisekile usuvele ukubonile lokho ukubatshela ukuthi “badinga ukusebenza ngokuzikhandla” akukhulisi ugqozi lwabo. Kodwa ungadangali, konke akulahlekile. Ngenhlanhla, iminyaka yocwaningo mayelana nokugqugquzela kuqhamuke amasu awusizo okufanele wonke umzali onengane engenamdlandla akwazi ngawo:
1. Yiba nentshisekelo ezithakazelweni zengane yakho
Sonke sithanda ukwenza izinto esizithola zithakazelisa, futhi izingane azihlukile kunathi. Bazokhuthazeka kakhulu lapho benza imisebenzi othanda ukuyenza.
- Zama ukuthola ukuthi ziyini izithakazelo zengane yakho,
- mkhombise ukuthi unendaba nalokhu akuthandayo, noma kuhlukile kulokho obungathanda akwenze,
- thola izindlela zokuxhumanisa abakuthandayo namanye amakhono ongathanda ukuthi bawathuthukise. Isibonelo, amahlaya angaba yindlela enhle yokuzijwayeza amakhono okufunda futhi uthole ulwazi olusha.
2. Khumbula ukuthi impumelelo iyisifiso esizalwa nabo
Abantu abaningi bafuna ukuphumelela emisebenzini abayenzayo. Ukwehluleka okuphindaphindiwe kungaholela ekukhungathekeni nasekudumazekeni, futhi kungaholela ekuziphatheni okufana nokucasuka noma ngisho nentukuthelo nokukhathazeka okungapheli.
Izingane ezingajwayele ukuphumelela zingaba nokungakwazi ukuzisiza ezikufundayo, okusho ukuthi zingafunda ukuzibona njengezehluleki. Ngamanye amazwi, izingane bangase balahlekelwe umdlandla ngenxa yokuntula ukuzethemba emandleni abo okufeza imigomo ethile. Yilokhu kuntula ukuzethemba okushayela ukuziphatha okunjengokugwema, ukucindezeleka, "ubuvila," nesimo sengqondo sokunganaki.
- Qiniseka ukuthi banamathuba empumelelo,
- msize azi ukuthi akubona kanjani konke akwenzayo kahle,
- ubeka imigomo enengqondo ngemisebenzi eyinselele kodwa efinyelelekayo,
- qiniseka ukuthi bazi kahle ukuthi yini elindeleke kubo. Ngokwesibonelo, uma ngokuvamile bedonsa kanzima ngomsebenzi othile, zama ukuxoxa nabo ngalowo msebenzi futhi ubachazele lokho okulindeleke ukuba ufezwe nokuthi kwenziwa kanjani.
3. Mbonise amathuba angamsiza amkhuthaze
Isibonelo, ingane ingase ibe nentshisekelo ekudaleni imidlalo yevidiyo ngemva kokubuka amavidiyo athuthukiswe izingane ezingontanga yazo.
- Ukuveza izingane ezinzuzweni zabanye emikhakheni abayithandayo kuyindlela enhle yokubakhuthaza. Nokho, lokhu akusho ukuqhathanisa izingane zakho nabanye noma ukulindela ukuba zifinyelele imigomo efana neyabanye.
- Ezinye izindlela zokukhombisa impumelelo yezinye izingane ezingontanga yazo ukubuka amafilimu, ukufunda izincwadi nezindaba, njll.
4. Ungabaniki "pep talk"
Into eyodwa isayensi (futhi ngokuqinisekile abazali abaningi!) eye yathola eminyakeni edlule yilokho "i-pep talk" ayisebenzi.
- Esikhundleni sokugxila ekusebenzeni kwangaphambilini, kungcono ukugxila ekusebenzeni okuzayo: Ucabanga ukuthi yini engayenza ngendlela ehlukile?. Uma wenza into efanayo ngaso sonke isikhathi, uzothola imiphumela efanayo.
- Esikhundleni sokukhuluma, bakhuthaze ukuba bazihlole.
5. Nikeza isikhuthazo nokusekela.
Kungokwemvelo ukukhungatheka lapho izingane zethu zibonisa ukuntula ugqozi. Engazi indlela yokubakhuthaza kusikhungathekisa nakakhulu! Iphuzu elibalulekile okufanele likhunjulwe ukuthi kungase kube nezizathu eziningana zokuntula ugqozi kwezingane: ukuntula ukuzethemba, ukuntuleka kokuhlanganyela ezinqumweni ezibakhathazayo (ukwenza umsebenzi wesikole wasekhaya nini, nini ukudlala imidlalo yevidiyo, imiphumela yokunganamatheli kulokho okulindelekile, njll.), ukukhungatheka, ukudumazeka, phakathi kwabanye .
- Wonke umuntu ubhekana nokwehluleka, futhi abantu abaningi babhekana nokwehluleka ngokuphindaphindiwe ngaphambi kokuba bazuze impumelelo. Khuluma nezingane zakho mayelana nokwehluleka kwazo. Bayaqonda ukuthi ukwehluleka kuyingxenye yempilo. Bazise ukuthi ukwehluleka kwethu akusichazi, kusenza sibe namandla. Khuluma nezingane zakho mayelana nokwehluleka kwabantu kamuva ababa ngabakhulu kokuthile.
- Xoxa ngezinguquko ezinhle ozibona ezinganeni zakho, ngisho noma lezo zinguquko zingaholeli ekuthuthukisweni ngokushesha. Uma ubona ukuthi uzama kakhudlwana, mtshele. Uma ubabona bezama kakhulu, kuvume lokho. Uma uqaphela ukuthi uzama enye indlela, mazise ukuthi ubonile. Ngihlale ngincoma umzamo hhayi ingane.
6. Funa usizo lochwepheshe ngenxa yokuntula ugqozi
Into esingavamisile ukuyizwa ngokuntula ugqozi kwezingane ukuthi kungase kubonise ukuphazamiseka kokufunda izinkinga ezingaxilongwa noma ezihlobene nokunakekelwa.
- Ukuphazamiseka okuthile kungazibonakalisa ekuziphatheni njengokuntula ugqozi, ukuzindela kanye nobunzima obukhulu bokugxilisa ingqondo. Inkinga yalezi ziphazamiso ukuthi zingenza ingane yakho ilahle ithemba ngenxa yokuhluleka njalo.
Ungangabazi ukuxhumana nochwepheshe uma uzizwa ukhungathekile ngenxa yokuntula ugqozi kwengane yakho. Uchwepheshe angakusiza ukuthi unqume ukuthi ingane yakho inokukhubazeka ekufundeni noma ezinye izinkinga futhi, okubaluleke kakhulu, ungayisiza kanjani leyo ngane.