Kunezinsuku lapho uzwa isidingo sokubaleka, unqamule amahora ambalwa bese uphuma kwi-monotony.
Into yokuqala efika emqondweni lapho sizwa izindaba zomama olahla izingane zakhe ukuthi ungumama omubi futhi akafanelekile ukuthola ukuqonda. Ake sibone ukuthi izimbangela ezingaba yini ezingamholela ekutheni athathe leso sinqumo esinzima.
Kunzima engxoxweni ngokushiywa kukamama enganeni yakhe hhayi ukubabaza ukuthi yini okwesabekayo! Angakwazi kanjani ukwazi! Ngeshwa bangakwazi. Kunezici eziningi zokulungisa isimo, imfundo engeyinhle, ikakhulukazi amanani, iminyaka nokuntuleka kokuvuthwa, umnotho omncane noma ukungabi nawo nhlobo, ukungazizwa ulungele, ukukhathazeka nokuba wedwa. Kukhona omama okuthi, ngemuva kokuba bekhona, bahlupheke ukucindezeleka kwangemva kokubeletha nabanye abebefomini ngenxa yesenzo sobudlova ...Isimo somndeni nemvelo lapho behlala khona kunganikeza okhiye besenzo esenziwe.
Kulabo bethu abangomama, kubonakala kungacabangeki ukushiya ingane, yize kunezikhathi ezinzima ezikhona. Kunjalo kunezinsuku lapho uzwa isidingo sokubaleka, nqamula amahora ambalwa bese uphuma emonotony, kepha kuyenzeka ukuthi uma uchitha ihora noma amabili ungaboni ubuso bengane yakho, uyinuka futhi uyigona, uzizwa ungenalutho futhi ungaphelele. Kulezi zimo isixhumanisi asinakuphikwa.
Emphakathini esihlala kuwo, osengumbono ojulile kunengqondo ukuzwa ukuthi ubaba usehambile ngoba ubephethwe amandla, kunalowo owenze umama. Kubaba size sibheke nezaba. Womabili amacala afanele ukugxekwa. Bazali, uma kukhona izithandani ezilethe ingane emhlabeni, zingabantu ababili abazimele, umthwalo kungowabo futhi uma kukhulunywa ngokuphelelwa yithemba, bobabili yibo abadinga ukuphunyuka.
Lapho ungumama
Uma ungumama uyashintsha ushaye izinto obukade ungaziboni phambilini. Lapho uba ngumama kufanele ulwele futhi uthuthuke usuku nosuku. Ukuba ngumama omuhle akuyona into ebalulekile kwizakhi zofuzo. Uyazazisa izikhathi zangaphambilini ozichithe ngokungcebeleka nokuzola futhi uze uzilangazelele ngezikhathi eziningi. Ngesikhathi uthi ubhorekile nesithandwa sakho, manje awusenaso ngisho nesikhathi sokuhlala phansi. Iphuzu lokuzibophezela nokuthembela ozizwa likhulu futhi uma ungaqinile kungakudla.
Okwamanje lapho ubamba ingane yakho ezandleni zakho uzizwa isibopho, uzizwa sengathi yingxenye yakho, kodwa ungazibona ungekho esimeni futhi ngokwengqondo ungekho noma ungaziboni uwulungele lowo mthwalo. Kwezinye izimo, ukulahlwa kukhethwa ngisho nokukhetha ngoba kulindelwa okungcono kakhulu kwengane. Ngokuphazima kweso usungumama futhi konke lokhu okungenhla kuphelile. Kufanele ucabange futhi uqonde ukuthi kufanele uvivinye umzimba futhi wenze izinto wedwa futhi kusizakale ingane yakho. Kumuntu ongakulungele ngokomzwelo, kungashaqisa.
Un ubabaIsibonelo, ezimweni eziningi, kuthatha isikhathi eside ukwamukela isimo esisha. Uyakuqonda ukuthi ubengubaba lapho ebona ukuthi impilo yakhe iguquka kanjani, lapho umlingani wakhe naye eseguqukile. Ukuzivocavoca usuku nosuku, kunikeza izinkomba zokuthi ikusasa lizoba njani. Indima kababa nomama kumele ichazwe ngokuqinile ukuze bangazilimazi noma bangakwenzi komncane. Ingane ibheka abazali bayo bese ithatha izenzo nezinkolelo zabo. Ngempela ingane ezwa ukulahlwa ngumama, izodinga usizo oluningi ukubhekana nakho.
Yini ukulahlwa kwengane?
Noma ngubani ongezi futhi anikeze ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo, ukuthanda noma ukuhamba nengane yakhe, naye uyamshiya.
Uma umuntu ophethe ingane, kulokhu umama, eyeka ukuyinakekela nokumnika ukunakekelwa okudingekayo, uyamshiya. Imvamisa sikuhlobanisa nokushiywa ngokomzimba, kepha futhi kungaba nemiphumela endaweni engokwengqondo. Ubaba noma umama ongamnakekeli futhi angamniki ukuxhaswa ngokomzwelo, ukumthanda noma ukuhamba naye, naye uyamshiya.
Izinhlobo zokulahlwa, kusuka kokumshiya emnyango wesibhedlela, nomakhelwane futhi ungaxhumani naye isikhathi eside, ukungayi kuye, enganikezi ukudla noma uthando isikhathi eside, engakhathazeki ngokuthi kukhona akudingayo, ungamvakasheli lapho ekhona ... Kungenzeka kube khona ukulahlwa okunomthwalo wemfanelo, ake sithi, lapho eshiywe ngenxa yezimo ezisindayo endaweni ephephile futhi kuhloswe ukuthi ingane ibe nokuphila okungcono, noma kunjalo umbono wakho futhi awusebenzi ngokuphambene nomthetho.
Ingane elahliwe iyoba nayo ukusilela kothando, ukungazethembi, ukungazethembi, ukuzenyeza, ngeke kuzwele kuhlupho lwabanye, uzozwa inzondo noma ukucasukela umama wakho uma ekulahlile, uvalo nokungabaza uma kukhulunywa ngokuba ngubaba noma umama phakathi kwezinye izinkinga ezingokwengqondo. Amacala lapho umama ashiya khona ingane yakhe ezindaweni lapho angafela khona anegazi futhi anokhahlo kakhulu, njengamacala akamuva omama abaphonsa izingane zabo ezitsheni.
Umthetho ngokushiywa kwengane encane
Imiphumela yezomthetho ngokushiywa kwengane encane ikhonjiswe ezindimeni ezingama-229 no-230 zePenal Code, ngokugqunywa ejele kusuka ezinyangeni eziyisithupha kuya eminyakeni emi-6. Ukulahlwa kwezingane kubhekwa njengecala elikhulu. Ubaba, umama noma umnakekeli umshiya endaweni eyodwa futhi azihlukanise njengomnakekeli. Ezindabeni zobugebengu, kuchazwa njengokushiywa ngokomzimba, kepha kungabandakanya nesici somzwelo.
Kunamazwe lapho kudabukisa khona ukuthi abanakekeli babo babashiya bengenakho ukudla, ukunakekelwa kwezempilo ..., futhi nakwabanye, iqiniso lokuthi banenhloso yokukulahla liyajeziswa. Labo abasola ukuthi ukulahlwa kufanele babike isimo kuziphathimandla ezinekhono, kumama nasenganeni okunguyena ongenacala nongasoleki okhona.
Izimbangela zokulahlwa kwengane
Izizathu eziholela ekutheni umama alahle ingane yakhe, noma ukuthi yini engemuva kwayo, azaziwa.
Kunezimbangela ezithinta umnotho, impilo yengqondo kamama, ukwesaba, udlame ... Njengomphakathi sivame ukwahlulela ngaphandle kokwazi futhi icala ngalinye linendaba ngemuva kwalo. Umama angaba yedwa ngenkathi ekhulelwe futhi ebeletha ngokulandelayo, ngaphandle kokusekelwa. Kulezi zimo kulapho ingqondo yomuntu idlala ngobuqili futhi umuntu azole futhi enze ngendlela engafanele.
Izindaba zezingane ezilahliwe zivame ukuzwakala, kepha, azaziwa izizathu eziholela ekutheni umama enze njalo, yini emuva noma ubani omshiye yedwa. Ukushiywa kwengane kukhulu kakhulu futhi nenhlalakahle yengane kufanele iqinisekiswe, kepha yize kunesenzo esibi kangako, umuntu obenesikhathi esibi kakhulu akufanele abethelwe.
- Izinga eliphansi noma elingekho le- ama-studio.
- Okuphansi izinga lezomnotho ukuhlangabezana nezindleko.
- Ngibe i- intombazane elahliwe noma ehlukunyezwayo.
- Okuncane noma cha ukusekelwa komndeni.
- Ngike ngahlupheka a ukudlwengula.
- Izinkinga zengqondo.
Ukudangala kwangemva kokubeletha
Kunamacala abucayi kakhulu adinga ukungenelelwa okusheshayo, ngaphandle kwalokho angaholela ekuziphatheni okungathi sína futhi alimaze ingane. Amazinga amaHormone ehla ngemuva kokubeletha futhi athinta ingqondo lomama. Kunomama abangalimazi ingane, kepha bayazilimaza, baze bazibulale bona. Owesifazane obelethayo angadinga ngisho nokulaliswa esibhedlela uma ehlaselwa ukukhathazeka, ukubona izinto ezingekho kahle, noma ukushintsha kwemizwa.
Abesifazane abaphakathi kuka-5 no-6 kwabangu-10, bangase bahlushwe ukucindezeleka kwangemva kokubeletha. Bazizwa bekhathazekile, abazimisele ukuba ngomama futhi abazi ukuthi, bangabaza kanjani amakhono abo, bazizwe bekhathele futhi ucindezelekile… Izithandani, uma zikhona, nomndeni kufanele unake kakhulu, unakekele futhi ukhathazeke ngomama ngemuva kokubeletha. Kuyalulekwa ukumnikeza lonke usizo oludingekayo hhayi ukumnqoba.
Umama olahla ingane yakhe imvamisa uqhelelene kakhulu nabanye abantu, ukungavikeleki, ukungazibophezeli, kuthonya impela ... Enganeni kungaba isenzo abasikhumbulayo impilo yabo yonke futhi esibaphawula ebudlelwaneni babo bezenhlalo esikhathini esizayo. Omama badinga inqubo yansuku zonke nengane yabo ukuqinisa isibopho. Isiqalo sinzima kakhulu, uyamthanda umuntu omncane oseze emhlabeni, kepha awumazi ngokujula. Ukwazi, ukubona, ukuzwa…, bakha izibopho nomuzwa.
Izikhathi eziningi, umama akatholi indlela yokuphuma, ngakho-ke ngokucophelela okukhulu kuyadingeka ukumkhombisa ukuthi ikhona. Akusizi ngalutho ukwahlulela nokucabanga. Omama abaningi bangamantombazane abangazi nokuthi bazinakekele kanjani futhi banokusilela okukhulu. Imvamisa bayazala ngaphandle kokukhulelwa okufisayo noma okujabulisayo ngoba impilo yakhe izungezwe ubunzima. Uma ubhekene nesimo ngaphandle kwesifiso, unokwesaba nokungavikeleki, uma ufinyelela umgomo, usenza udangele, ukhathele futhi ungaboni mqondo.
Bangishiyele izingane ezi-3 ezineminyaka engaphansi kwengu-10 ukuthi ngihambe nenye futhi yena akaziboni futhi akakhulumi nazo
Umama wezingane zami unezinyanga eziyi-14 ukuthi ngilahle izingane zami ezi-3, waya kwelinye idolobha, akakhulumi nabo ngocingo ngoba kuze kube yileso sikhathi unabo abavinjiwe, akabathumeli imali yesondlo sabo, akazikhathazi ngempilo yezingane zakhe ngaphandle kwesikole Wamukelekile nakancane, isehlukaniso sinikezwe mina ngaphandle kokusayina futhi kungacelwa ukuthi nginikezwe umkhawulo othile ukuze ngingasondeli ezinganeni zami angifuni ukufuna imali, kungenziwa noma yini ngakho
Usibali wami wangishiya nengane iminyaka emine. Ngimkhulisile ngamthanda njengendodana yami wavele wafika wangikhohlisa. Angazi ukuthi ngizoyibuyisa kanjani ngoba ayinaso isibongo somfowethu kwazise umfowethu wayefile ngesikhathi ezalwa. Unempilo engazinzile impela, ngingathanda ukuthi othile angiqondise ukuthi yini engingayenza ukubuyisa ingane yami
Kwenzekani lapho umshado uhlukana, futhi ukuhlelwa phakathi kwalaba bobabili kungukugcinwa okwabiwe kwamadodakazi abo, futhi umama uhlala enza izaba namanga okuthi angabi nabo? Ingabe lokho ukulahlwa? noma ukungabi nentshisekelo?
Umama uwabona kanye ngesonto, amadodakazi akhe athi afuna ukuchitha isikhathi esiningi naye, futhi impendulo kamama izaba zokungabikho lapho.
Bangikhohlisa ukuthi bangithathele indodakazi yami, ngenkathi ngisemncane futhi ngangingenakho ukwesekwa kwezezimali kunoma ngubani ("ingane ayikwazi ukuphatha omunye omncane" basho enkantolo) Sekuyiminyaka emibili ngingamboni. ngiyabona ... Namanje angikwazi ukumkhohlwa, akekho umuntu oqonda amacala afana nalawa.
Ngithole ezinsukwini ezimbili ezedlule ukuthi umama akayena umama wami wangempela? ukuthi utshelwe ukuthi kunentokazi ekhipha ingane futhi umama wayejabule ngoba wayesefuna ukuba nentombazane yebo umama wayesenezingane ezi-4 kodwa wayesafuna ukunginakekela nokuthi le ntokazi eyanikela. mina isipho sasingikhulelisile futhi lokho kwase kuzozalwa. Ngesikhathi ngizalwa umama wathola izindaba zokuthi ngizelwe vele uye endlini yentokazi ezongilanda enovalo lokuthi lentokazi izozisola kodwa cha le ntokazi yayingigcine ngingagqokile, 4days ngingadlile. kwaze kwafika umama ezongilanda losisi wanginika umuntu osengumama wami engingakaze ngimazi ngaye akakaze angifune njengoba ngineminyaka engu-24 uyeza ezobheka mina hhayi mina kodwa bathintana nami. mama ukuthi lo wesifazane ngihamba naye ngifuna ukuthi unomdlavuza onganqamuki futhi angafi ngoba ufuna ukuxolisa kimina ngokuthi odokotela sebemyekile.
Umama ungitshele lokho ngamehlo agcwele izinyembezi ngoba ungikhulise njengendodakazi yakhe futhi uzizwa enecala ngokungifihlela lokho isikhathi eside kodwa akakwenzanga ngoba ebemubi kepha kunalokho ngoba akangizisanga buhlungu futhi ukuthi angizange ngidale ukucasukela noma ngubani. Futhi manje njengoba le ntokazi inje ekugcineni, ingifuna ngenxa yecala likanembeza. Kodwa angifuni ukumbona noma yini, angazi ngisho negama lakhe, angazi lutho futhi ngicabanga ukuthi kuyinto engcono kakhulu.Ngifuna ukuqhubeka nempilo yami njengakuqala. Ngaphandle kwalokho ngithole ukuthi ubenikeze omunye umuntu ingane, ngicabanga ukuthi ungumfowethu, angazi ukuthi ukwenzeleni lokho ngoba kubangele ubuhlungu obukhulu namhlanje kubuhlungu futhi ngaphandle kwephutha lami, ngaphandle kokuthi ngifune ukuzalwa, ngizilimaza kakhulu. Angazi noma ngenze into efanelekile yini ukungayi ukuyombona kodwa ngicabanga nje ukuthi akakaze angifune ngibona sengathi angifanele.
Indodakazi yomyeni wami ihlala njengezithandani, okokuqala yayikholelwa ukuthi ngeke ikhulelwe futhi ithole ukwelashwa kokuzala ngoba kwakuyinkohliso yayo enkulu okwamanje. Lapho wayecabanga ukuthi ngeke akwazi, wakhulelwa intombazane eneminyaka emibili manje. Uzakwethu akazange amsize ngalutho, akukho akwenzayo ngaphandle kokumthethisa nokumthuka uma ebuya emsebenzini evela ezingeni lokuthi angazi ukuthi enzeni ngoba umthethisa ngakho konke. Enganelisekile ngakho, waphinda wakhulelwa futhi waba nenye indodakazi enonyaka owodwa ubudala. Ugogo nomkhulu kayise wamantombazane bahlala amakhilomitha ama-3 ukusuka kubo, banendlu enkulu, ipulazi lezinkomo elikhulu, imifino, izinkukhu, konke futhi ngaphezu kokubanikeza konke ukudla, amantombazane nawo ayabanakekela kusukela ngosuku lokuqala. Lapho lo mama enabo ekhaya, uvele adlale ngabo sengathi bangonodoli, uzigqoka lezo zingubo ezincane ezibukekayo nezixegayo, izicathulo ezihambisanayo, uzikama, futhi yilokho kuphela. Ngokubheka ukuthi bahlala enkabeni yesigodi lapho kunezindlu ezintathu kuphela, umfula, udaka, nohlaza. Bachitha isikhathi sabo besicela ukuthi sibathengele izingubo ezincane ezinhle esikhundleni sezingubo ezilusizo lapho behlala khona. Uhlala njalo efuna imali nemali ethe xaxa, futhi asazi ukuthi kungani. Ngesikhathi efika endlini yethu entsha wathi uzosilethela amantombazane ukuze
babehlala nathi, asikaze sisebenzisane nabo, (hhayi njengogogo nomkhulu kababa abanabo nsuku zonke kusukela beseyizingane) futhi wayeya emsebenzini futhi eze azobabona ngezikhathi ezithile. Esontweni eledlule uqhamuke ekhaya namantombazane amabili ahlala amakhilomitha angama-200 ephethe amapotimende amathathu ezingubo nezicathulo. Kepha akazange alethe okusanhlamvu, ubisi, amanabukeni, noma uhhafu wezinto ezidingekayo. Simtshele ukuthi ingane enonyaka ikhala kakhulu cha, kepha ingane eneminyaka emibili siyigcinile sayithengela konke okungalethwanga ngunina nayo yasazisa ngemuva kwezinsuku ezimbili ngoba sambuza ngoba intombazane yayingafuni ukudla lutho. Sasikhathazeke kakhulu. Intombazane yangibiza ngomama futhi njengoba ngangimtshele ukuthi umama wakhe wayengomunye umuntu, wayengaqondi. Izolo umyeni wami uye wayobuyisela kubazali bakhe kanti umama wentombazane wenze ihlazo lokuthi uyibuyise, nokuthi ubengayicelanga nokuthi uyishiye endlini kagogo nomkhulu (abangabaxoleli abahle futhi batholile ngothando olukhulu). Umama angaba kanjani nobugovu obungaka? Ngabe uqinisile ekhanda noma unokuhlukumezeka okuthile ngokwengqondo? Futhi ubaba wamantombazane, mncane kakhulu kunaye futhi akanakho okuhlangenwe nakho, uhlala ekubuyiseni futhi umkhohlisa ngamantombazane bese yena kuphela enquma. Ngolunye usuku u-confessba 'ukuthi angazi ukuthi ngenzeni, noma yini engiyenzayo, uhlala engithuka futhi engithethisa ”…. Uthanda amadodakazi akhe.
Sawubona kusihlwa, udaba oludlule luthakazelisa kakhulu, ngingubaba ophethe indodana yami, ngoba umama wakhe uthathe isinqumo sokuhamba nomunye umuntu, futhi lesi simo sinzima kakhulu endodaneni yami, ngithanda ungisize amathiphu nezeluleko zokuqhubeka nendodana yami kulesi simo ngiyabonga
Akucaci, impela akufanele kubethelwe ngoba kungowesifazane, manje uma kungowesilisa owenza isenzo esifanayo, impela uma kufanele abethelwe, ngaphansi kohlobo oluthile lwenkolelo eyakhiwe kabi. Izinga eliphindwe kabili elisetshenziswa ngabesifazane kulolu daba likwenza kucace ubuzenzisi lapho kusingathwa udaba lokushiywa kwengane.
Umama wangilahla ngesikhathi ngizalelwa esibhedlela, eminyakeni engama-46 edlule, angizange ngizibheke ngakho-ke angazi lutho ngomndeni wami ongizalayo kakhulu ngoBaba ongizalayo, iqiniso ukuthi ngiyakholelwa ukuthi icala likaMama ongizalayo anginalo Akumele ngisho kukhunjulwe ukuthi wayengithwele, ngalokho okwenzeka kwaqondana ngahlangana nabanye besifazane abalahla izingane zabo futhi iqiniso ukuthi abanandaba nalezo zingane, baqhubeka nezabo. ukuphila, bayashada noma bashade, banezingane eziningi futhi labo abalahlile babalulekile umama
Ngazi ingane unina ayilahla ekhemisi eSan Salvador, e-El Salvador, inezinyanga ezingu-18 ubudala. Ngenhlanhla abanikazi bendawo bayamazi ugogo ozala umama bamnika. Ugogo wayengowesifazane osekhulile, nokho wayenakekela umzukulu kanye nobunzima obuningi, njengoba wayempofu kakhulu, kodwa enothando oluningi? wakhulisa ingane. AKAZE abuye umama ozalayo, wathumela izincwadi kunina ongugogo wengane elahliwe ecela uxolo futhi ezithethelela ngokulahla ingane. Kwenye yezincwadi uthe useMexico usebenza kanzima ukusiza ingane, AKAZE akwenze. Ukuxhumana kwehliswe kwaba yizinhlamvu ezi-4 futhi akaphindanga wakhathazeka ngengane, wamshiya ecwile ekulahlweni okunonya nokungenabuntu. Ubaba omzalayo wenza okufanayo, owahamba nentombazane nomfana, izelamani zosana olulahliwe, ngaleyo ndlela banyamalala unomphela ekuphileni kwengane encane. Manje ngo-2021 lowo mfana useneminyaka engu-49 ubudala, ushadile unezingane ezi-4 azikhonzile futhi ngeke ngiqonde ukuthi kungani umama wami ongizalayo ANGINGATHANDI futhi wangilahla unomphela. Ngicabanga ngezizathu okungenzeka ukuthi zenze lokhu akwenza futhi kungavunyelwa kuphela ukugula okunzima noma ukufa uqobo, kodwa ngaphandle kwalokho AKUKHO LUTHO oluzokwenza. Ngisho nezinja zilwela imidlwane yazo zize zife. Iminyaka eminingi ugogo wayengenza ngikholelwe ukuthi umama ongizalayo washona empini yombango i-El Salvador yami ethandekayo eyabhekana nayo. Ngakhula kanjalo. Ngaze ngashada kwathi lapho indodakazi yami yesibili izalwa, ugogo washona ngo-2002, ngeshwa ngenxa yemvelo kanye nokukhula kwakhe, ngaleyo ndlela kuveza izinhlamvu engangizisho ekuqaleni, kangangokuthi ngathola ukuthi Umama wami we-biologic AKASHONA, kodwa wayelahliwe. Ngimbonga kakhulu ugogo wami, engihlale ngimfonela futhi ngizombiza ngoMama njengoba uNkulunkulu emfake endleleni yami njengengelosi engunogada. Ngaphandle kwakhe bengingeke ngibe muntu empilweni ngoba wangivikela ngisho kukho konke ukushiyeka nokulinganiselwa kwakhe. Ebusuku, eminyakeni yami, phakathi no-2021, ngisakhalela yonke indlela engiyihambile futhi imibuzo izwakala njengezinsimbi zesonto: kungani wangishiya? Wayengangithandi ngani?
UFuema: UMario Bustos
Sahlukana, 2 months later, nginomnikazi wendawo eqashiwe, (elele) ngase ngibamba owabanika isondlo (silala) ngabamba umfana ona 25 engangihamba naye ebusuku, ngahamba. Ingane yami eneminyaka engu-7 uZodwa, ngathi akwanele lokho, inobudlelwane obufana nalena esasinayo sineminyaka engu-9 nobaba wengane yayo yokuqala (washada 14 on 29) wamnika umama wakhe manje ulinde isosha laseMelika elizofika ngoDecember lithi angeke lihambe, sekuphele 3 months sehlukanisile bhala kuFacebook kuphela.